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March 28, 2024, 03:37:58 PM

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[Football]

Started by mayer, October 16, 2004, 03:17:34 PM

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ccbaxter

I don't like this thread.
Someone please stamp on it.

phes

Quote from: rudi on August 15, 2007, 09:06:23 PM
And, whisper it, Jol's a lovely fella, but don't you get the feeling he doesn't ever have a Plan B...?

Yeppy - he's tactically inept. I think I had an short debate with some one re. this in t'other thread a few weeks back. The guy is really bad.

Don't forget the shit goalkeeper, too. He's got to be just about the slowest goalkeeper in the top-flight, such a hesitant and un-natural shotstopper. And I wouldn't say blame the defence, because he looks shit for England, too. Nope, he's not our number five, let alone our number one.

What Spurs need is a good old fashioned bit of passion. I don't think "whaddup Jol" is the man to inspire this.

Robinson just seems to get worse and worse doesn't he? I think his worst flaw is coming to claim crosses. He consistently moves a little then hesitates, leaving himself in "no-man's land" as the football experts say.

Jim Jarmusch

The commentary on the goals of Liverpool's game last night are worth hearing. I can't pick out a favourite quote so many to choose from this odd coupled sports team.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ihd7vQZF5NQ

buttgammon

Touchdown! Class in a glass! This stuff is hilarious(ly bad).

t_kingpin

Thats great, a geordie & a yank!!
Kuyt..............No its Hyypia!!

buttgammon

I bet the American couldn't even understand the Geordie. I would imagine most people who aren't very well acquainted with British accents would struggle to understand a lot of British regional dialects.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Jesus, that American isn't bad, just jarringly incongruous- that Geordie however is unbelievable.

Crouch is omnipresent with telescopic legs.

Bulging net? Broken Spirits! (I think I might change my name to that)

Mr Colossal

#10719
He clearly says 'touched in!' though.

You've got to love Sid  Waddell... If you think that's bad, you should hear him suddenly leap out of his seat in an orgiastic frenzy at the most trivial of events whenever sky sports are showing 9 ball pool. It might actually be the same pairing, actually.


Its just the sudden cold>hot irregularity that makes it sound so bizarre. He also tries to hit the nail on the head and gets it laughably wrong on a regular basis....


I remember one occasion  where he blurted out 'He's like Socrates!  He knows all the angles!'


Lee Dixon did something similar on MOTD2 a week or two ago as well- he got a bit carried away with his little 'analysis' where one of the inferior minions like Gavin Peacock is given about 20 seconds to show us how insightful they are and wax lyrical about a certain player  who deserves their expert spotlight, and must have got a bit excited and thought he'd slip in a funny.... I think it was about that man city youngster, and after he'd finished Peacock or Stubbsy added 'yeah, looks like a name we'll be hearing for years to come', ready to move to the next piece. But then lee dixon made a sort of whimper, which drew everybodies focus back to him... He then realised he'd made some sort of mistake and had to fill the expectation with something so then awkwardly added 'Yeah... My phones been going off all night!' touching his shirt pocket as if it added some sort of proof a mobile phone was actually in there, and it hadn't stopped ringing because some Man City youngster, who he was completely unconnected to, came on and had a good game.

Which was met with an embarrassing deathly silence- a fatheaded Stubbs just looking at him oddly, promptly punishing an over-eager dixon, who sunk back into his seat with a gormless look of submission stretched accross his face, for getting a bit 'above his station',  with a glare that said 'well it's back in the dark cupboard for you' before adding  'Erm right... and moving on!'.



It was one of those blink and you'd miss it moments of bizarreness which i think can only be surpassed by Andy Townsends 'tactics truck babes' cutaway on itv's The Premiership, which has achieved legendary status amongst me and the mates who caught it that night, which really had to be seen to be believed.


(if anybody is curious, it involved an introductory cutaway to andy towsend in the 'tactics truck' - only this time, for reasons unknown, he was surrounded by a throng of glitter clad showgirls pointing towards him with their fans and tasselled playthings, Townsened sat smugly in the middle with his arms outstretched, lapping it up like some sort of football statistics-based pimp!  It cut back to a completely sedate Des Lynham, and the show carried on as normal, with not a mention of it being raised ever again!  )

hoverdonkey

Quote from: rudi on August 15, 2007, 09:06:23 PM
Stalteri, Gardner, Jenas and Keane shouldn't be starting in a team that's Champion's League quality, should they?

Malbranque NEVER plays in his best position, Chimbonda's good, not great, jury's still out on Zakora (calm down dear), Huddlestone doesn't play nearly enough, Lennon's the new Anderton, King's the new Lennon and Rocha only benefits the team when he's off the pitch.

Now, now. Come on. Stalteri only played because all three of our left backs were injured. otherwise he'd ger nowhere near the side. Gardner is our FIFTH choice centre half. He's prone to stupid errors, but for a fifth choice centre-half, he's really pretty decent. Who is Arsenal's fifth choice centre half? Jenas obviously divides the fans, the talent is there but he seems to lack the personality to impose himself on games, and as for Keane, we all know he's rubbish before Christmas. He'll still score 20 this season.

Chimbonda is great, wins every header, best right back we've had for donkey's years and Rocha, a slip against Arsenal aside when he was thrown in last season, has always done well. He's a great squad defender to have because he can play right across the back four. I'm running out of patience with Zokora, because he stops Jenas playing well. He's supposed to be a holding midfielder but you are just as likely to find him down the left wing, where big Tom at least allows Jenas to push on while picking out quality passes.

Other positives? Boateng scored again in the reserves tonight so he'll be around the first team squad in the next couple of games, which is when Jenas will really have to improve because Boateng is supposed to be ace. German young player of the year, while Taarabt and Bale on the left later in the season? Yes please.

My prediction: We'll finish fifth again quite comfortably and push for UEFA Cup glory.

The Plunger

Jenas is fucking dire. I'm always amazed when he turns out for England. Seriously, he's like a less injury-prone, less talented, pointless, younger version of Dyer.

session9

Quote from: Sid WaddellWhen Alexander of Macedonia was 33 he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer. Bristow's only 27.

chand

Quote from: Mr Colossal on August 29, 2007, 09:35:18 PMYou've got to love Sid  Waddell... If you think that's bad, you should hear him suddenly leap out of his seat in an orgiastic frenzy at the most trivial of events whenever sky sports are showing 9 ball pool. It might actually be the same pairing, actually.

Speaking of commentators losing it, this is a good place to put this clip from Sky Sports News, of Chris Kamara being driven to the very brink of insanity by the confusion over David Healy's goal that never was the other week.

[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2gIWIqTx5w[/youtube]

rjd2

Quote from: The Plunger on August 30, 2007, 12:09:37 AM
Jenas is fucking dire. I'm always amazed when he turns out for England. Seriously, he's like a less injury-prone, less talented, pointless, younger version of Dyer.
Totally agree Spurs seems a hme for over rated English players who cant cut it against the best such as Jermaine Dafoe and Paul bloody Robinson.

hoverdonkey

Who the Hell's Jermaine Dafoe?

duckorange


Lets choose one fucking football thread and stick with it!

rjd2

Quote from: hoverdonkey on August 31, 2007, 10:08:55 AM
Who the Hell's Jermaine Dafoe?
The most overrated Enlish striker about at the moment.
Oh spelling mistake!

England 2-0 Israel. Barry, Terry/Ferdinand.

Pogue Mahone

Is this the real football thread then?


quadraspazzed

Ireland 1-0 down to the Czechs, playing badly, and looking like they're on their way out of the competition once and for all.

All I can say is I hope this has silver lining and Staunton is finally sent packing.

stephenjwz

anyone see that fanbanta program on channel 4? If you didn't I reccomend that you don't.

buttgammon

I almost watched it last week but realised it sounded shit and decided to steer clear. Having glanced at it briefly I think I was wise.

rudi

I just saw it.

I was balancing things on my lap and the remote was out of reach so I actually sat through the whole thing.

It's very, very bad.

actwithoutwords

Next person to post in this thread rather than the newer football one is an absolute cunt...

rudi

Sorry about that (I went there!!11!!1).