Author Topic: LEGEND GARY  (Read 132269 times)

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2940 on: August 13, 2019, 10:46:44 AM »
"Just banter, Daz. If England had won we wouldn't need to compensate with some turd throwing"

NSFW: https://www.swindonadvertiser.co.uk/news/17833039.charges-dismissed-two-wiltshire-men-accused-lobbing-poo-train/

dex

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2941 on: August 13, 2019, 03:46:14 PM »
The Ledge enjoys ringing Nick Ferrari on his LBC show and asking loaded questions such as "do you still knock your mrs around?"

"Helps them out, Daz. Helps them out."

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2942 on: August 13, 2019, 11:17:08 PM »
Ledge buys a mask of a skeksis from The Dark Crystal on Amazon. Daz comes back from the shops one day and as soon as he opens the flat door, Ledge jumps out into the hall.

"RARRRRRGGHHHH!!!"

"Fuck's sake, Gary, you scared the living shit out of me!"

"Tch! Daz, you fucking little nerd! I'll fucking kill yeh yah wimp, c'mere!"

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2943 on: August 14, 2019, 12:32:04 AM »

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2944 on: August 14, 2019, 06:50:21 PM »
"You're a pathetic fucking little loser nerd freak, Daz."

Daz starts crying.

"Just bantz, Daz. Just bantz."

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2945 on: August 14, 2019, 09:39:59 PM »
Legend Gary gives a piggyback ride to an old flame.

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2946 on: August 15, 2019, 11:36:43 AM »
Gary cadges change outside the offie until noon.

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2947 on: August 16, 2019, 05:13:00 AM »
Daz does a bit of window shopping around the Arndale Centre to the sound of the Noseybonk theme.

dex

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2948 on: August 16, 2019, 09:53:12 AM »
Gary gets a tattoo of Winnie the Pooh holding a balloon.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2949 on: August 16, 2019, 03:18:51 PM »
Gary emails his local paper saying he is happy to form a government of "lads" to sort out Brexit.

Pubes Daz will be Minister without Portfolio, Legend Gary will be Prime Minister, Minister for Sport and Minister for Culture.

The letter is not printed and his email address is blocked.

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2950 on: August 16, 2019, 03:21:14 PM »
Ledge and Daz are watching Britain's Roughest Chavs on some crappy channel or other.

"Next time you're feeling bad about yourself, just be thankful you ain't sunk to the level of this bunch of lads, Daz!"

"Yes, Gary, I'm thankful I haven't. I'm thankful I haven't..."

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2951 on: August 17, 2019, 02:35:11 AM »
"Fancy a pint, Daz?"

"Nah Gary gonna stay home and get some knitting done."

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2952 on: August 17, 2019, 01:01:47 PM »
"Gary! Gary! Gary! Gary!"

"Stop fucking about Ledge and press 'START'. Here's the joint."

Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2953 on: August 17, 2019, 03:12:49 PM »
Gary sing-shouts The Theme from S-Xpress to a cabbaged tramp in a doorway.

2 in the afternoon.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2954 on: August 17, 2019, 03:20:50 PM »
Legend Gary steals the groundsman's tractor and runs over Steve Smith 'for the nation/lols'.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2955 on: August 17, 2019, 05:27:46 PM »
Legend Gary pretends to be the King of Denmark, and sings in the streets of Oslo.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2956 on: August 17, 2019, 05:34:34 PM »
Oh no, Legend Gary is on one of his farting binges again.

And I mean binge
« Last Edit: August 17, 2019, 05:47:11 PM by Shoulders?-Stomach! »

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2957 on: August 17, 2019, 06:36:55 PM »
"Happy Birthday Daz, here you go mate!"

"Oh brilliant Gary, cheers man! Just let me get the wrapping off... looks like a games console, or..."


Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2958 on: August 19, 2019, 04:22:36 PM »
"Fancy another game of FIFA, Gary? Gary?"

"Oh sorry Daz, I was temporarily distracted by a fog of ennui."

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2959 on: August 20, 2019, 02:20:22 PM »
"Daz, I have a confession to make. I don't like football."

"Ha ha, wait till I tell the lads about this, Gary!"

Daz is found dead in a field in Essex the next day.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2960 on: August 20, 2019, 09:09:28 PM »
Legend Gary's burkini goes down a storm with the lads, the local constabulary, and as far as he can tell 'the rest of those Tunisian cunts'

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2961 on: August 20, 2019, 09:16:23 PM »
Legend Gary is credited for the first 'Wank On', which was recorded during the first 'Shag Off' in 1983

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2962 on: August 20, 2019, 09:26:07 PM »
Legend Gary takes a break from pranking the world by visiting a hot dog stand.

the midnight watch baboon

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2963 on: August 20, 2019, 09:38:42 PM »
Legend Gary has got It 2 on deev. Drew that clown cunt on the cover himself, in arty black biro.

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2964 on: August 21, 2019, 12:43:11 PM »
"Bored, Daz. What will we do?"

"How about trying out the new VR thing I got, Gary?"

"Yeah, go on then!"

"By the way, Gary... you know that Black Mirror episode 'Striking Vipers'?"

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2965 on: August 23, 2019, 10:08:10 PM »
"Here Gary, I-"

"Nah fuck it, Daz. Not arsed, mate. Not arsed."

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2966 on: August 25, 2019, 02:03:19 PM »
"I has been bitten by a darcula Daz, beware, raaargh!!!"

"Unconvincing, Gary. Unconvincing."

dex

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2967 on: August 25, 2019, 03:25:04 PM »
Not safe for work? Don't fuckin' matter mate cos I ain't got a job. Ha!

Glebe

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2968 on: August 26, 2019, 07:23:16 AM »
"Here Daz, do you-"

"NO, Gary."

"You ain't heard what I was gonna say yet."

"Sigh. Okay then, go on..."

"D'you fancy strangling a load of cats and fucking them over a bridge at cars?"

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: LEGEND GARY
« Reply #2969 on: August 27, 2019, 04:35:32 PM »
"Sir Legend of Gary, I presume? On guard."

"Ah, Sir Pubes of Daz. We meet again. Take that, you foul tyrant"

"Hah, my sword is more than a match for your puny blade."

"If you two don't put the baguettes down, pay for the damage and leave I'm calling the police."