1001 things to do before Clowne

[poo]

1001. Rim a loony
1000. Make ghost noise
999. Visit Shropshire

[Glebe]

998. Fisticuffs.
997. Shronk.
996. Sparrowhawks?

[Spoon of Ploff]

995. Take away the first number you thought of
001. ... put it back again
993. Learn to play the zither

[madhair60]

992. Pasty
991. Another pasty
990. Half a one
989. Can't manage any more mate
988. Oh go on then

[Uncle TechTip]

987. Mate
986. Mate
985. Mate

Mate

[Kane Jones]

984. Eat a plateful of boiled human hair
983. Incinerate a gaggle of geese
982. Fart on a balustrade
981. Charge headfirst into a set of bastards

[Puce Moment]

980. Compliment a Trevor

[Kane Jones]

979. Punch a Margaret in the solar plexus.

[Spoon of Ploff]

978. Oh, I've just thought of another one.

[Dannyhood91]

977: Put an entire hill in your mouth.

[Dex Sawash]

976. FINISH THE BASTARD XMAS VERSUS

[Puce Moment]

975. Check piping bags are free of shit before using on cake.

[kittens]

974. cauterise anus shut
973. crush one testicle in a g clamp
972. peel bellend from penis with your fingernails

[Dannyhood91]

971. Listen to every song there is
970. Birth a pebble
989. Ruin a grubby mans dinner

[Dannyhood91]

971. Listen to every song there is
970. Birth a pebble
969. Ruin a grubby mans dinner

[Kane Jones]

968. Milk a bat

[kittens]

967. force a branch from a monkey puzzle tree backwards up a horse's asshole

[captaincockring]

966. Visit Whitwell, Hodthorpe and Creswell.

[Mr Eggs]

965. Make cockskin wanking glove.

[Clatty McCutcheon]

964. Become a mid-ranking official in your local dominoes' league
963. Learn the names of all the principal watercourses in Powys and the most common form of silt found on their stream-beds.
962. Have sex in 'all the positions' whilst dressed as Ramsay Macdonald.

[poo]

961. Tuna crunch
960. Wank-drive
959. Do a 180 darts

[Fishfinger]

958. Bring piss to a shitfight.
957. Bring a nun to a fistfight.
956. Bring a gun to a bunfight.

[canadagoose]

955. Eat chips, cheese and gravy with Lt. Col. Gloylot Boswego and his brother.

[Glebe]

954. Gollycogs.
953. Reginald D. Hunter.
952. "Put it back, Nevis!"

[Puce Moment]

951. Learn and then teach tapestry.
950. Tickle a mime.
949. Make a wish upon a falling man.

[poo]

948. Jugout a smirn

[Glebe]

947. Snuggly whumkins.
946. Jungle juice.
945. Frotty's knotty problem!

[doppelkorn]

944. - 941. Alphabetise the Boasson-Hagen reports
940. Shred reports
939. Panic-buy sellotape

[Howj Begg]

938. Write  the novel The Ingenious Gentleman Don Quixote of La Mancha by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra.

[Bhazor]

937-145 Lube up and accept the inevitable