Royal Family Watch

[BlodwynPig]

I would have watched the entire thing had Graham Norton, in Eurovision mode (or even Noel Furlong mode) had been the commentator.

Or maybe the Rifftrax.

Norton's camp sarcasm is a bit passé these days?

[Attila]

Norton's camp sarcasm is a bit passé these days?

Dunno, but I like him for Eurovision anyway.

[BlodwynPig]

Dunno, but I like him for Eurovision anyway.

Ok, well I liked Wogan in the 80s/90s until his sarcasm developed into blatant jingoism. I hope Norton is not regurgitating yet same Daily Mail outrage masquerading as comedy indignation

[Norton Canes]

Whitney Houston? Is The Sun trying to tell us something there..?





Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh dear, Meghan, you have got some surprises in store.

[Attila]

Get your bids in early

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-44197388

[momatt]

Take the Royals in a new direction?

What, actually doing something? Or just subtly changing the direction in which they all do fuck all (except breed)?

[Blue Jam]

Get your bids in early

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-44197388

Other items given to the guests include a bottle of water, a chocolate coin, a fridge magnet, a badge and a 20% off voucher for the Windsor Castle gift shop.

...a torch, a CurlyWurly, a book of stamps, a free digital watch with denim strap, a vodka miniature, a Bic-style razor and a copy of the Daily Express. Ooooooh, it's a good paper...

[Blue Jam]

(wot no printed marshmallows?)

[pigamus]

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bi93xbFnURf/?igref=ogexp&utm_source=fb_www_attr

[Blue Jam]

Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh dear, Meghan, you have got some surprises in store.

Are Ladbrokes offering odds on the length of time it takes for her spirit to be utterly broken? I reckon The Firm will manage it in about a year, maybe less if they get Syoots on the same medication Kate is on.

[Attila]

Are Ladbrokes offering odds on the length of time it takes for her spirit to be utterly broken? I reckon The Firm will manage it in about a year, maybe less if they get Syoots on the same medication Kate is on.

She's already had lessons in crotch-level handbag clutching

[Blue Jam]

That's a nice dress and a nice hat. I bet Kate is just out of shot, looking at her stylish and age-appropriate outfit and thinking "Mwahahahaha, just you wait until you see your new wardrobe..."

[Blue Jam]

...and here's a Bad Lip Reading- hurrah!

https://youtu.be/SKV6h_5XFbk

(blimey, Wills is looking very odd here, like a cartoon of the real thing)

[Attila]

...and here's a Bad Lip Reading- hurrah!

https://youtu.be/SKV6h_5XFbk

(blimey, Wills is looking very odd here, like a cartoon of the real thing)

Lost it at the exchange about puppets and free will.

[ollyboro]

She's already had lessons in crotch-level handbag clutching

Could be mistaken, but the black kid channeling his inner action man has almost certainly got a fully blown Piers Morgan in his pants. There's standing to attention and there's standing to attention.

[Blue Jam]

...so has Charles, he's just hiding it behind his top hat.

[Norton Canes]

Are Ladbrokes offering odds on the length of time it takes for her spirit to be utterly broken? I reckon The Firm will manage it in about a year, maybe less if they get Syoots on the same medication Kate is on

Did this get mentioned?

Megan Markle to undergo six months of brainwashing and subjugation royal etiquette training

[Alberon]

I can just imagine it. Every time she shows any resistance or raises an objection Philip revs the Fiat Uno parked in the corner of the room.

[momatt]

What a load of self-important bollocks.  These cunts genuinely think they're special and different.

Daily Mash nailed it:
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/celebrity/meghan-to-spend-six-months-learning-how-to-wave-20180524173504

THE Duchess of Sussex is to be taught how to be an 'effective royal' by learning how to wave correctly.

The Queen's assistant private secretary Samantha Cohen is firmly convinced that, for example, it is possible to wave at the public from a passing carriage 'badly' and is desperate to show Meghan 'the right way'.

A palace insider said: "An 'effective royal' is a contradiction in terms. An 'ineffective royal' is an oxymoron.

"The public might think there's a difference between the ones who turn up at events smartly dressed and the likes of, say, Prince Edward, but he does all that too. It's just nobody turns up or cares.

"To be royal all you have to do is be royal. It's like, how much better can you be at cutting a ribbon? There's a ceiling on the skill. And it's low."

[Alberon]

You've got to be able to engage in short bursts of vacuous small talk with a Common Person without vomiting on them in utter disgust and, to be fair, Meghan is probably way ahead of most if not all of the other Royals in that.

[Attila]

Now I wanna marry a royal, and take all of the refinement lessons, so that at the opportune moment, I can do this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uozGujfdS0

[Mantle Retractor]

I saw this in a garden centre yesterday. My wife wanted some compost and a fern, that's why I was there:



and I am sharing it with you now in the hope that you too experience the anger, repulsion, despair, hatred and soul-crushing melancholy that I did - all in the space of about two seconds.

There's also, inevitably, one of the CoD but I can't bring myself to link it in the same post. Rest assured it features an equally smackable, smug pose on the cover.

[the]

Ironically, showcasing a picture of Phil looking distinctly slitty-eyed.

If you gave a description to a police sketch artist and said '... and he was dressed like a toff!' - ^that's exactly what they would draw.

A guffawing entitled chump, occupying a completely undeserved slab of the unthinking deferent attention slathered on these human nobodies.

[Blue Jam]

The conditioning has begun:

[Norton Canes]

They've made the criticism pretty explicit by referencing The Handmaid's tale. Like it.

[Blue Jam]

Gotta love a bit of Incubator Chic.

[BlodwynPig]

Top hat on Harry proving that this so-called modernising of the royals after the wedding is bearing fruit

[kalowski]

Top hat on Harry proving that this so-called modernising of the royals after the wedding is bearing fruit

Under his eye.

[imitationleather]

What was Southgate doing in the wood?

Burying Neymar.

[Blue Jam]

Spot The Difference: