Royal Family Watch

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Was great to see the fams influence exerted during the hacking trial

Oh wait

Almost like as per usual they only start giving a shit when it affects them personally.

[Glebe]

HARRY: My tears for Africans.

[BlodwynPig]

a wonderful festive cuntfest

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-38304158

"He then squeezed one of thehis berries on it and was like 'I find this stuff weird' and then she was like 'oh, I really like it'.

"Then he wanked off with the tree on his shoulder, holding her hand, and she was holding in her other hand a bunch of mistletoe."

The real cunts in the story

[yesitsme]

Why doesn't the one that's married to Kate shave that ridiculous bit of hair off?  Look pal you're bald, face it.  Get a diamond encrusted 12 blade Faberge bic out and have done with it.

[Glebe]

Christmas at Hogwarts has become "major twatfest".

[touchingcloth]

He was like "I find this stuff really weird", and she was like "oh, I really like it."


End them with axes immediately.

[touchingcloth]

Kensington Palace said it would not comment on the matter.[/size]

Why would they? Why would anyone? Why would you even ask for a comment? How would you even ask for a comment?


"We've heard from our sources that Harry has bought a Bantermas tree."


"..."


"Can you comment on Harry buying a tree?"


"Get in the fucking tower."

[BlodwynPig]

Palace press office send BBC a story about Prince Harry buying a christmas tree.

BBC journalist "Can we get a comment from the Palace regarding this story?"

"No"

BBC journalist smirks and files another hefty payslip in the cabinet.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Banterprince Balding Fast

Not long now

Days even

[touchingcloth]

What's that on your bonce, my liege?


A diaphanous wisp of Hewitt.


Can I have one also, sire?


Roger, and aye, if you suckle on the balding royal dong.


Forsooth. And what garb, what vestments must an interminable whelp such as I don when imbibing of thine reddish member?


Brocade.

[BlodwynPig]

PR firm priming again.

Fozzy Bear gets his own special puff piece

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38355368

[mook]

suck back, he's morphing into rory mcgraph(sp?). the cunts

[mook]

state of it! one hundred & fifty eight years of sickening privilege & they can only muster up one shit eating grin between them. 

[BlodwynPig]

If you stare at the queen for a bit, she ages hideously

[mook]

nah... i don't like looking at her for too long.

there's a little dot of something on my monitor, when i scroll it to just the right place ol' queenie gets a biindi. imagine how furious that would make prince phil!? the cunt.

[shiftwork2]

This country is fucking bonkers isn't it?  In a bad way.

[Blue Jam]

Interesting happenings over at my guilty pleasure, the Royal Gossip forum- ie, the forum which is even more scathing about the royals than we are:

http://royalgossip.forumprofi.de/index.php/topic,8994.0.html
   

MOVED: Prince Harry is dating Meghan Markle V
« on: December 16, 2016, 02:45:05 pm »
This topic has been moved to Members Only Board.

http://royalgossip.forumprofi.de/index.php?topic=8991.0

Thank you for your patience with this. Mods are discussing the best way to research and vet the large volume of members applying.  That takes time and we don't have a large staff to handle it all.  As soon as this is stabilized we'll reopen it.  Thanks again!  YM

There's been a lot of discussion of Meghan Markle- five threads so far, she's like their very own Corbyn- and now discussion is restricted to the top secret members' only forum[nb]Damn, I'm going to have to register now, aren't I? I want to see what sordid stuff is in there...[/nb] and members are vetted, presumably because Kensington Palace and Quentin Letts are lurking and want in. Along with that unprecedented "leave my bird alone" letter from Banter Harry and that Popbitch article detailing the legal threats from Mrs Banter's people, this is all getting rather creepy.

All those inane articles about Bants and Meghan being "spotted" doing mundane things, wearing matching bracelets etc seem to be part of some big plan to micromanage the public's perception of this relationship too. I reckon it must be pretty serious and Meghan is being groomed to be Princess Banter, like the time when Waity Katie was given a bodyguard and that signalled that she was about to join The Firm. So romantic, aren't they? Anyway, I wouldn't be at all surprised if we get a 2017 royal wedding or if Prince Philip is spotted haggling for a second white Fiat Uno.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

No tomb for Elizabeth and Charles, no long slow sleep of death embalmed. Burned like the heathen kings of old.

[Glebe]

Is it just me or does Charles have a fat hand?

No tomb for Elizabeth and Charles, no long slow sleep of death embalmed. Burned like the heathen kings of old.

Meanwhile, Phillip will be roused out of his racist slumber and encouraged to take charge again. He has no hope of victory, but he will face them nonetheless.

[Blue Jam]

Is it just me or does Charles have a fat hand?

GOUT.

"Oh Mummy, when will you just do the decent thing and die, heheheh?"

[Never son, never. I am in league with David Icke's Lizard People and Brucie, dream on sunshine]

[Serge]

state of it! one hundred & fifty eight years of sickening privilege & they can only muster up one shit eating grin between them.

This looks like one of those movie posters where they couldn't actually get the cast together for a group shot and have just badly photoshopped them into one hideously unrealistic image. It is a 'shop, isn't it? They're not in the same room.

[Glebe]

If you stare at the queen for a bit, she ages hideously

Forsyth isn't the only one who has a Dorian Gray-style portrait in his loft...

[BlodwynPig]

Time to retire, ma'am?

"Time to die"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38380285

[ollyboro]

Cocks and tits bitten off by a pack of rabid corgis.....In the study.

[Spoon of Ploff]

Forsyth isn't the only one who has a Dorian Gray-style portrait in his loft...

Only the queen's painting isn't in the loft: it's walking around married to her grandson Boom-Tishh_hhhh.

[touchingcloth]

Karma to anyone who can stomach photoshopping that picture so that Charles is wopping out his fat, gouty cock, which is certainly an act which would explain both of their expressions.

[touchingcloth]

Time to retire, ma'am?

I've seen things you plebs wouldn't believe. Paraplegic sons of empire rowing a ridiculous barge. I watched Micahael Fagan leap naked in the dark over the Buckingham palace gates. All those moments will be lost in time, like signets on Charles. Time to retire.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38380285

Rutger Hauer's let himself go.

[BlodwynPig]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38380285


Rutger Hauer's let himself go.

That's really good

[Glebe]

"I WANT MORE LIFE... FUCKER!!"

[touchingcloth]

This is a rather nice demonstration - if demonstration be needs be - of where Wills picked up his nation beating laziness. What does it mean, exactly, to step down from a job when your job involves literally no work? I'd have more respect from some millennial cunt publicly and lavishly announcing that they were giving up political activism, and meaning by it that they were no longer go to retweet hashbooks on The MyBo.

And this is also a rather nice demonstration - if demonstration be needs be - of where Chas picked up his gouty digits. Look at queenie's fucking graspers! She looks like one of them machines from off of open face coal mining.