Royal Family Watch

[Blue Jam]

Man who stepped back from public service because he is a nonce to get award for public service:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/prince-andrew-among-royals-honoured-25080498.amp

He really is the CoD's favourite isn't he?

[imitationleather]

Your mum giving you a medal has to be the lamest thing ever.

Is he five years old or something?

[Uncle TechTip]

Man who stepped back from public service because he is a nonce to get award for public service:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/prince-andrew-among-royals-honoured-25080498.amp

He really is the CoD's favourite isn't he?

If he falls, the institution falls with him.

[touchingcloth]

Is paying money to an international noncemeister to be able to have sex with one of his underage trafficking victims really as bad as all that? It would seem like a silly thing for Andrew to have to give up his career selling arms to Middle Eastern despots over. A storm in a teddy bear's teacup.

[Blue Jam]

Bants and Syoots have released the first pic of daughter Lilibet and it appears Archie is growing into a right little Mini-Bants. The Hewitt genes are strong:



Being dressed in your dad's trademark style still beats being like Damien McOmenface and being forced to dress up as a Victorian schoolboy.

(big fan of rolled-up shirt sleeves myself, not gonna knock it)

[Blumf]

Headlines I'd like to send back in time 50+ years:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-59839351

Virginia Giuffre: Prince Andrew accuser seeks evidence he could not sweat

Lawyers for a US woman who has accused Prince Andrew of sexual assault are seeking proof of the British royal's alleged inability to sweat.

[jamiefairlie]

Headlines I'd like to send back in time 50+ years:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-59839351

They're all sweaty by the time the lawyers are finished with em.

[Blue Jam]

Prince William turns 40 today and some pics are out to mark the occasion:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-61873273

He's wearing a hat in all of them.

So much for all the praise he got for doing this privately because he's genuinely just a nice guy, while EVIL MEGHAN would have had a Netflix crew there. I don't think these pics were taken on cameraphones by randoms wanting selfies.

[Ferris]

He's wearing the same hat because all 3 photos were taken during his 15 minutes of charity last week.

Definitely not a hastily arranged PR exercise because they needed photos where he's not driving about in a colonial Range Rover or standing next to an unconvicted nonce.

[robhug]

and just out of picture an army of bouncers with automatic weapons aimed at anyone within 100 yards of the baldy twat.

[Butchers Blind]

Never trust a bald man wearing a cap.

[Bad Ambassador]

Never trust a bald

[Fambo Number Mive]

Queen currently in Edinburgh

...Following her arrival in Edinburgh, the Queen took part in the Ceremony of the Keys on the forecourt of the Palace of Holyroodhouse.

During the ceremony, which marks the beginning of Royal Week in Scotland, the monarch is symbolically offered the keys to the city by the Lord Provost.

But tradition dictates that she then returns them, entrusting their safekeeping to Edinburgh's elected officials...

Wonder what would happen if the Queen refused to give the keys back.

[Ferris]

Or just keeled over after receiving them and unable to return because she's dead.

What are the keys for anyway? Not like the city's locked, you just go up the A74(M), can't miss it.

[Ferris]

No mention of Charles and his suitcases of millions of euros from a sheikh? For shame, CaB.

It was given to his charity, of course after being deposited in a Coutts bank account. His charity banks with natwest according to their financial statements but don't worry about that, just details.

[Des Wigwam]

Has this been mentioned yet? Was in latest Popbitch digest. Sadly the headline has now been amended.

What has Kate Middleton done to upset online news aggregators? A few weeks ago we mentioned that MSN's AI-driven site had scraped a story from an obscure French blog and republished it as: "Prince William And Kate Middleton Separate As Duchess Moves Out With Children".

With no humans around to monitor it, the story was left up for nearly 24 hours before anyone intervened.

Kate is suffering a similar indignity after the Yahoo News aggregator republished a story it found on Town & Country magazine's website yesterday. T&C have since changed the unfortunate original headline (one British Vogue ran with a version of too, before changing it) but no-one seems to have tipped off Yahoo News yet.

Which means they're still proudly using the headline: "Kate Middleton Looks Business Chic in White Power Suit to Celebrate Windrush Day"

[Butchers Blind]

No mention of Charles and his suitcases of millions of euros from a sheikh? For shame, CaB.

It was given to his charity, of course after being deposited in a Coutts bank account. His charity banks with natwest according to their financial statements but don't worry about that, just details.

Money for experimental gout treatment.

[dissolute ocelot]

Or just keeled over after receiving them and unable to return because she's dead.

What are the keys for anyway? Not like the city's locked, you just go up the A74(M), can't miss it.

Oi! Glasgow's up the A74, Edinburgh's the A1.

Loving this Guardian Evil Queen for a story about the Queen being evil in Scotland. She looks like she's deciding which of your internal organs she'll eat first.

[Ferris]

I would switch to the A702 and swerve through Biggar before it devolved into the M74 (though I accept the M1 is probably a faster route).

[Alberon]

No mention of Charles and his suitcases of millions of euros from a sheikh? For shame, CaB.

It was given to his charity, of course after being deposited in a Coutts bank account. His charity banks with natwest according to their financial statements but don't worry about that, just details.

It was just resting in one's account.

[Blue Jam]

No mention of Charles and his suitcases of millions of euros from a sheikh? For shame, CaB.

It was given to his charity, of course after being deposited in a Coutts bank account.

Goutts more like.

[Uncle TechTip]

Not to defend the sausage-fingered failure but Coutts is just a brand for NatWest.

Still well dodgy and a nice twofer with the news that the queen has been meddling in Scottish laws for 50 years.

[Fambo Number Mive]

The Queen is set to get another £30m of public money.

The Queen is in line to get a £30m bonus due to a little-known rule that means the size of a taxpayer-funded grant can never go down.

The Royal Family's income is generated, in part, by the Sovereign Grant, which is funded by the taxpayer and paid for by the government. The payment is currently £86.3m a year.

The size of the Grant, which is used to fund things like royal trips abroad and maintenance of properties, is normally equivalent to 15% of the profits made by the Crown Estate, although that has been increased to 25% recently to pay for extensive renovations to Buckingham Palace.

According to the i newspaper, the Crown Estate made significantly less profit in the past two years due to the impact of the pandemic.

While this should have reduced the size of the Sovereign Grant, the amount of money paid by taxpayers will actually stay the same due to the existence of a little-known clause called the "golden ratchet".

The rule, which was introduced by the Cameron government in 2012, states that the Grant should remain the same as the previous year, even if the Crown's profits have decreased.

It means the size of the taxpayer-funded payout can never go down, even if the profits from the Crown Estate does...

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/queen-to-get-30-m-cash-boost-despite-cost-of-living-crisis-155733471.html

The Independent also have an article on this but it is subscriber-only despite being important news that as many people as possible should be aware of.

So at a time when inflation is rising and people are struggling more and more with the cost of living, Cameron's government have made sure that someone who lives in a palace gets a multimillion pound bailout.

[Blue Jam]

"What are you implying, Jacinda?"

Ardern gifts Prince William book about potato as she wraps up Europe tour

I guess a book about an egg would have been too unsubtle.

[Blue Jam]

Fucksake Bants, stop making me like you:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-62090652

[Glebe]

Never trust a bald, phimotic man wearing a cap.

Ardern gifts Prince William book about potato as she wraps up Europe tour

[king_tubby]

#PrinceofPegging is a trending hashtag on the old Twitters.

For some unknown reason.

[Blumf]

Joined a group of gypsies, going house to house selling pegs

[Ferris]

All wills for British citizens must be made public.

However, it has been judged to be good and right that Phil the Greek's will is exempt from such pleb laws so no one knows what's in it.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2022/jul/29/judge-was-right-to-ban-media-from-prince-philip-will-hearing-court-rules

Perhaps they will review this once he finally goes (which hopefully is several years away yet).

[Blumf]

I'm not sure Harry still wants all that Nazi memorabilia