That's all I got

[Ferris]

Putting the "ire" into "Ireland".

[petril]

Replacing the word "heart" with the word "arse" in song titles

Total Eclipse of the Arse
My Arse Will Go On

Etc etc

Somewhere in my Arse

[Ferris]

Putting the malt into malta

[petril]

putting the boot into Bhutan

[Ferris]

putting the boot into Bhutan

Now you're catching on!

[DoesNotFollow]

@oatmeal.com

[Spoon of Ploff]

Tie a piece of string to something and take a photograph.


I might try this later if I can be bothered.

[Chollis]

"You've got to sniff a botty or two" to the tune of Oliver's Pick a Pocket or Two

[willpurry]

Branches of Grot decreed essential.

[Old Gold Tooth]

FuckDonald's

[Captain Z]

Singing "smash the system" to the tune of "stop the pigeon".

[petril]

Bertrand Gachot's barmy army

[non capisco]

Lockdown with your cock down

[Spoon of Ploff]

Pockets full of sprockets.

[PlanktonSideburns]

Tie a piece of string to something and take a photograph.


I might try this later if I can be bothered.

tempted. phones up in the loft. will do it tommoro if the idea still takes me

[PlanktonSideburns]

through the earth, wind, fire and flames

[Old Gold Tooth]

Pritt stick
Shitt prick

[Pink Gregory]

Violent Beauregarde

It's like she is in the book, but instead of chewing gum, she's just battering children and kicking adults in the back of the calf.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Blind date but the girl contestant is Purple Aki.

[GMTV]

Joey Bukkake of the Gape Syndicate

[petril]

You are invited to be part of Marc Gene's posse

[the midnight watch baboon]

Something based around the fact that all Jimmy Savile wanted was to know which tense he lived in

Now...Then?
Now? Then.
Now! Then!

That and lots of kidz' vanilla arses.

[Huxleys Babkins]

A.A. Milnecraft

"Oh, bother" said Pooh as he got eaten by a square zombie thing.

[Ferris]

A. A. Gillne.

Christopher Robin shoots a baboon and writes about it in the Telegraph.

[pancreas]

J.R.R. Hartley, Fly-fishing in Gondor.

[darth andy]

King Rag Part 1


Driving mud minded down a dual carriageway
Locked eyes with a driver over the divide
a gruesome second
He beckoned
And reared,
driving bait,
It was him;
King Rag.

no knuckled white knuckled,
Shaved head no hair
ribs gleamed off the wheel shouting
'It's rude to stare'
But it was only a second
Then it was normal road
And I didn't see it for long but I was sure it was him,
But that could not happen today   .

[darth andy]

Crab sandwiches with a friend

Me and my friend
My friend and me
Ate Crab sandwiches
For our tea

He didn't like them
I didn't like them
Crabs are weird things from the sea

[Ferris]

Porridge is like liquid cookies. Think about it.

[darth andy]

King Rag Part 2

Standing in line normal and ache as usual
Queue is longer but nothing to shuffle or tut at,
Voice ahead 'this is mine and I never want it ever gain , take it!'
Cannot extrapolate intention from aggressive interaction
Try to act like other people
It's damn King Rag, Worm King
Puckered fleshy skull all twisted up in sinew
Normal as hell,
Would he recognise me?
Rag retreats to inner bite and jacket falls and gone
I was next in line anyway

[darth andy]

King Rag Part 3

Sad that graham passed away when we were young he said we could be cousins
But he had growing pains
But we could be cousins if we wanted
Pretending to spy on churchgoers
Then that man asked grahams dad to talk away from the car