Author Topic: That's all I got  (Read 102709 times)

Glebe

  • Please beware as there is a draclea on the loose.
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1710 on: October 18, 2020, 12:27:24 AM »
Are you saying his cage is named "nah"?

Nah, I ain't.

The Shining except Boris Johnson is Jack Torrence? "Ooh, here's Boris!" Or something like that? Is that funny?

What is humour?

petrilTanaka

  • Are we counting shites?
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1711 on: October 19, 2020, 11:29:18 AM »
we're the Tweenies son, and we haven't had any facking dinner

Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1712 on: October 19, 2020, 12:21:26 PM »
A microscope that lets you see what's happening inside your microwave. In real time.

Glebe

  • Please beware as there is a draclea on the loose.
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1713 on: October 19, 2020, 04:07:48 PM »
If you like a lot of chocolate on y'biscuit then you are AIDS-tier.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1714 on: October 19, 2020, 07:36:36 PM »
Gunpowder, Treason, and Cock.

The Mollusk

  • We whipped 'em, didn't we?
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1715 on: October 21, 2020, 07:08:48 AM »
Kansas’ Big Book of Things to Shout at Football Matches

1. GO ON MY FUCKIN WAYWARD SON!!!!!


...

hmm

Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1716 on: October 21, 2020, 10:15:14 AM »
Need some kind of theory connecting everything in the world called "pinto".

Captain Z

  • CABBALD
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1717 on: October 21, 2020, 02:19:47 PM »

The Mollusk

  • We whipped 'em, didn't we?
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1718 on: October 23, 2020, 08:44:31 PM »
I vant to suck your dick

touchingcloth

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Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1719 on: October 25, 2020, 07:28:47 AM »
Legend Gario 64.

Cuellar

  • I'm over here
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1720 on: October 26, 2020, 04:19:54 PM »
Bone Again Christian

Pingers

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Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1721 on: October 26, 2020, 05:35:07 PM »
Are Brave Boys Adventure Golf. On hole 2 you have to putt the ball into Bobby Sands' mouth and it rolls into his stomach.

Mr Banlon

  • If you're gonna go nog, you gotta go Mingus
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1722 on: October 26, 2020, 06:12:37 PM »
Arkwright goes to buy a birthday card for Granville. Comes back with a copy of Christian Discourses.

Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1723 on: October 26, 2020, 11:22:23 PM »
Every time a Tesco self-service till rings, an angel gets its wings (stuck in an automatic door).

petrilTanaka

  • Are we counting shites?
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1724 on: Yesterday at 01:59:43 PM »
Kansas’ Big Book of Things to Shout at Football Matches

1. GO ON MY FUCKIN WAYWARD SON!!!!!


...

hmm

things you hear at airports:

1. I'm very sorry sir, your wayward son will have to travel in the hold on this flight

FerriswheelBueller

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    • I am antsy for baseball in the off-season.
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1725 on: Yesterday at 03:28:37 PM »
Something about Kenneth Williams and Sid James joining Kansas and only writing one song.

batwings

  • Timewaster seeks same. No timewasters please.
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1726 on: Yesterday at 04:04:14 PM »
Funnily enough Roland, the dreams in which you're dying are the best i've ever had too.

pancreas

  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1727 on: Yesterday at 04:31:11 PM »
Carrying the Can. Thriller starring Daniel Radcliffe as an employee in the quality control department of Heinz who must prove his innocence after he is framed for spiking a whole day's worth of beans with Ipecac.

Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1728 on: Yesterday at 04:33:26 PM »
Can The Can, with Philip Schofield. ITV, Saturday Night. You probably have to show you can do things, maybe in some kind of can?

Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1729 on: Yesterday at 04:36:49 PM »
Can-Du Attitude. In the mythical land of Can-Du, people are optimistic about achieving goals.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1730 on: Yesterday at 04:59:35 PM »
Can-Du Attitude. In the mythical land of Can-Du, people are optimistic about achieving goals.

Can-Du in the Wind

The follow up documentary, detailing the failure of the mythical land of Can-Du and its people to achieve any goals at all.

pancreas

  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1731 on: Yesterday at 05:09:31 PM »
Can-Du Crush, gory mobile phone game where you have to suppress rebellions in the land of Can-Du during its time under the control of the East India Company. Got banned from the App Store following BLM protests.

Pingers

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Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1732 on: Yesterday at 10:02:16 PM »
A version of Cinderella where it's not a shoe but a 6" diameter butt plug.

An erectile dysfunction product called Lazarus. It doesn't work, they just thought it would be funny.

Replies From View

  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
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Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1733 on: Yesterday at 11:22:33 PM »
what if you were bitten by a radioactive anus

non capisco

  • A ridiculous boy on a makeshift vehicle
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1734 on: Today at 12:02:05 AM »
https://www2.b3ta.com/lets-fist-again/

OOH OOOOOH, I THINK YOU'LL FIND IT'S ALREADY BEEN DONE, ACTUALLY! Get a life, Captain Z, you square. I've got a life, why don't you get one?

non capisco

  • A ridiculous boy on a makeshift vehicle
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1735 on: Today at 12:05:15 AM »
How about come on baby, let's do the fist?

pancreas

  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1736 on: Today at 12:28:16 AM »
I fist a girl and I like it

pancreas

  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1737 on: Today at 12:32:45 AM »
Bucket Fist: terminally ill patients get a visit in hospital by a celebrity they admire. But with a twist fist. Hosted by Esther Rantzen.

FerriswheelBueller

  • CaB rear of the year 2020
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  • Take it easy, but take it.
    • I am antsy for baseball in the off-season.
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1738 on: Today at 12:45:45 AM »
OOH OOOOOH, I THINK YOU'LL FIND IT'S ALREADY BEEN DONE, ACTUALLY! Get a life, Captain Z, you square. I've got a life, why don't you get one?

I’ve been singing this to myself and chuckling away at my own inventiveness. I realize now I’ve been Derren-Browned and what I thought was a free choice of obscene song was actually implanted in my brain.

Replies From View

  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
  • Golden Member
  • *****
  • Gargoyles have milk bags.
Re: That's all I got
« Reply #1739 on: Today at 08:49:30 AM »
That song where they go “ohhhhhh threee fingers two toes one up one down and chisel me up keep moving, three fingers two toes one up one down and chisel me tits keep moving, three fingers two toes one up one down and chisel me cock keep moving, they all keep tumbling down” except it’s a kids show and everyone is naked and also parched


So parched that there’s little glasses of water arranged near the camera and throughout the chisel dance the performers are constantly rushing up to the little glasses and gasping and trying to hoover out even the tiniest droplets from them using their mouths.  But they are scared of their producer so they quickly return to their dancing spots to continue the chisel dance.