Author Topic: Retro Review - The Quakernin'  (Read 1904 times)

Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« on: February 17, 2004, 08:48:53 PM »
CUE: Level 42: Running In The Family..

WIth Joseph and Emiiiiiiiilllllllllllllly, HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHH, ARGGHHGHGHGH, HAHAHAHAHHAAAhaaaa, hahahahahah,...ARGHHHhh, hoo,...heee...AHHHHHHH, HAHHAHAHAHAH, HAHAHAH...I hate that song...

It is I, Unfwego Muloko-Bolowee-Chinchogo-Jarjarbinksa, hahahahahhah...
My fwiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnddddsss, hahahhaha. Still bwingin you all da latest moo-vays to open here in sunny ol' Zimbabwe!
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA, ooooohhhhh-hoooo-hoo-hoo, ARGHHahahha.
My fwiieeeeeeenddsssss, hahahahahahahahHAHAHAHAhee.

Today I am talking about a most fun moovay called 'The PlaTOON!', HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAarghhhhh, hahahhahhooHOO!!!!

It is starting wid dee man from 'Hot Shots', hahhahaHOO! Him be going on holiday, to CHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! HAHAHAHAHHAHA, hoo!
Hims be shooty, shooty, shooty, shoooty, SHOOTY, then there be, BANG, BANG, BANG-BANG-BANG-RTRTRTRTRTRTRTTTTTTTRRRRRTT!

My fwieeeeeeeeeenddddddddddddsssssssssss! Hoo!

It also stars Tom Bereenger and Willem Defoe....


I enjoyed it mostly, it was all fun all the way around, but my youngest daughter, Unlaywaybolobobobonobonobioboecinquentoforddatsun, she be crying, 'myaaaaa, myaaaaeahhhh, myaaa', she be findin' dee violence MOSTLY distubing...HAHAHAHHAHHHHARGHHHHHHH, AHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHA, HAHAHAHHAHRGHHHHHHhhhhhhh, ahahahhah, HOOOOOO!
Which I regret.

I am also liking it becase it has dee lead singer from 'Living Color', ahhhh memories.....

My mother died while writing dat song.


So to sum up, HOOP!

And now I hand you over to Quincy LeVerene, who is a blatant homosexual...
HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHAH, ARGHHHHHH, HAHAHAHHhhahahahahhahoophoophoophoophoophoop, ARRGHHHKKK, HAHAHAHHAHAH...he would be burnt to death in my country.

- - -

CUE: Prince Ft Sheena Easton - You Got The Look

Ta Unfwego.

>You be speakin' like girl, OHOHOHOHOOHAHAHHAHARGHahhahahahhaa..

Err, yeah.

Platoon, or as it was known in Japan, 'Mega Penis Of The Futile Few', is a curious film, directed by famous gay director Oliver 'Embargo Stone, at no point does it even ATTEMPT to hide what it really is. A love story between two men, set against the backdrop of some war or other. It is notable, that every single actor, cast and crew member that worked on the film now live in a commune on the outskirts of Arkansas. Where they are, at last, free to express their love for one another while wearing extremely tight Levi's and nothing more.

A little known fact is that the entire film was actually shot in Cornwall, except the scenes that weren't.

Fans of the film will be glad to know that the long awaited 'Directors Cut' will FINALLY be available from March 5th. The most obvious inclusions being the now legendary 'three-way-toss-salad' scene between Defoe, Berenger and Sheen, which apparently took forty seven days to shoot, and was regretably edited out of the final cut. The more observant of you will notice Oliver Stone in the background masterbating into the chin of a vietnamese youth, as played by Dom Deluise.

Also, it now ends with everyone being friends.

So, there we go, right I'm off to buy a pitbull.

Next Week: The Godfather, or as I call it 'Italian Spunk Tastes Like Salami'


Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #1 on: February 17, 2004, 08:53:13 PM »
Please don't stretch the page, edit that will you?  Thanks.  Better sort out MM and SE mods while I remember.

What's with all the "AHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHKKKK!!!-HOOP! " or "//////////////////////////////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\" shit by the way?  It looks like you're actually saying something that might be worth reading in that post but I'm not about to fish round the toilet bowl in the hope of finding something that's not shit.

« Reply #2 on: February 17, 2004, 09:07:03 PM »
Yeah, what's up with that?

The old site never did that, dagnammit.

I have no idea how to edit my own posts?

'I like ya Neil, I always liked ya, best god damn bartender from here to Illinois, or Katmandu for that matter'.

But ya forgetting the golden rule, EVERYTHING I write is horse-shit.

That said, keep ya pecker up, and may it be fellated by buxom german bitches of obtuse virtue.


fanny splendid

  • Chaos Reigns
Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #3 on: February 17, 2004, 09:21:12 PM »
Next to the 'quote' button, in the top right hand corner of each of your posts, there should be an 'edit' button.

Click on that, and edit away.

Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #4 on: February 17, 2004, 09:33:45 PM »

'The Force Is Strong With This One'
« Reply #5 on: February 17, 2004, 10:21:31 PM »
Fucking Genius.

I applaud you sir.


Vermschneid Mehearties

  • phpBB A lesson in quantity over quality
Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #6 on: February 18, 2004, 10:56:09 AM »
EVERYTHING I write is horse-shit.


  • I tire of you... and your tiresomeness
Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #7 on: February 18, 2004, 01:10:17 PM »
Quote from: "Vermschneid Mehearties"
EVERYTHING I write is horse-shit.

Well at least he's got the guts to admit it ; )

Smackhead Kangaroo

  • Losing is always an option
Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #8 on: February 18, 2004, 03:57:22 PM »
Guts you say? it'd be delusion to deny it.

Vermschneid Mehearties

  • phpBB A lesson in quantity over quality
Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #9 on: February 18, 2004, 06:20:20 PM »
You've created a bit of a paradox there sproglet.

1.If that 'quote' wasn't there, and I was referring to myself as someone whose every word is horse shit, then you've agreed with what I've said, disproving a contradicting point. It also means that you can never ever disagree or seriously argue against any of my opinions in the future, because you'd basically be arguing against horse-shit opinions. But that in itself will be innacurate, because:

2.I'm quoting someone. But you knew that, and used it for some petty point scoring exercise. Which is fine if you really want to do that. So..

3....good job I didn't think about this too much. You'll probably just write 'Cunt' and then never visit again...


  • I tire of you... and your tiresomeness
Retro Review - The Quakernin'
« Reply #10 on: February 18, 2004, 08:33:09 PM »
Quote from: "Vermschneid Mehearties"
You've created a bit of a paradox there sproglet...

Yadda, Yadda...  Badda Bing, Badda Bong...  Betty Da Boop...

I'll only withdraw it if you promise to stop giving dogs such a hard time.