Nintendo Switch

[Kelvin]

Wait, can you not turn that stuff off?

[The Boston Crab]

No

[Kelvin]

Fuck me. How can they be so useless? It's beyond belief.

[Beagle 2]

Even if these games weren't awful, and maybe three of them are worth a candle, controlling them with the joy-con is a terrible experience. So I would consider buying these:

...so that I had a proper D-pad for all my games that work better that way, and the inevitable Snes releases. Except, wait... it doesn't work when slotted to the side of the switch? And it only works with NES online games anyway? Fucking Nora.

I suppose I'll get one of these. But they look a bit cheap and nasty.

The crapness of the joy-cons is actually starting to ruin my enjoyment of the console full stop to be honest. Now it's a success and all that can we have the actually nice-to-hold handheld-only version please.

Right, that's all my moaning about Nintendo done for the day. Time for a shit.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Even if these games weren't awful, and maybe three of them are worth a candle, controlling them with the joy-con is a terrible experience. So I would consider buying these:

...so that I had a proper D-pad for all my games that work better that way, and the inevitable Snes releases. Except, wait... it doesn't work when slotted to the side of the switch? And it only works with NES online games anyway? Fucking Nora.

I suppose I'll get one of these. But they look a bit cheap and nasty.

The crapness of the joy-cons is actually starting to ruin my enjoyment of the console full stop to be honest. Now it's a success and all that can we have the actually nice-to-hold handheld-only version please.

Right, that's all my moaning about Nintendo done for the day. Time for a shit.

Impressions for that Hori D-pad joycon have been really positive bar the battery drainage issue.

[Kelvin]

Even if these games weren't awful, and maybe three of them are worth a candle, controlling them with the joy-con is a terrible experience. So I would consider buying these:

...so that I had a proper D-pad for all my games that work better that way, and the inevitable Snes releases. Except, wait... it doesn't work when slotted to the side of the switch? And it only works with NES online games anyway? Fucking Nora.

I suppose I'll get one of these. But they look a bit cheap and nasty.

The crapness of the joy-cons is actually starting to ruin my enjoyment of the console full stop to be honest. Now it's a success and all that can we have the actually nice-to-hold handheld-only version please.

Right, that's all my moaning about Nintendo done for the day. Time for a shit.

You shouldn't have to do this, but the Switch Pro controller is excellent, if you can afford one. The joy-con grip has always been rubbish imo. I'm honestly surprised more people havent complained about it, considering most people presumably don't have a Pro controller.

[Ferris]

Christ, the absolute state of the Switch. I have one and am enjoying the new Mario and that, but it's like Nintendo are getting it wrong on purpose just to test peoples' limits.

[Mango Chimes]

I use the Switch pretty much exclusively in handheld mode and don't have a problem with the joycons (except when the right one disconnects mid-play – hoping the mysterious recent joycon update might fix that...)

[The Boston Crab]

Some of the worst takes going itt rn

[The Boston Crab]

Dark Souls Network Test has begun

[The Boston Crab]

Your missinnn it is mate

[The Boston Crab]

Why do I ever bithrr

[The Boston Crab]

I'm not actually drunk, just genuinely staggered that nobody here is on the DS Network Test!

[Consignia]

For all the shit about the NES games... Dr. Mario is pretty good. Worth the subscription, I reckon.

[Ferris]

Some of the worst takes going itt rn

rrr

[falafel]

I'm not actually drunk, just genuinely staggered that nobody here is on the DS Network Test!

Waiting for launch mate. Why bother if progress doesn't carry over? Also the window of opportunity is shite (dinnertime? Really?).

[The Boston Crab]

Yeah, that's totally fair enough but if the online doesn't work properly, I know who to blame for not helping out with the stress test.

[Timothy]

Thinking about selling my Switch. The only game I was looking forward to (Ace Attorney) is also coming to PS4.
Not much great games on the horizon as far as I know of. Not much of a SSB fan.

What are some great releases you are looking forward to?

[Kelvin]

Thinking about selling my Switch. The only game I was looking forward to (Ace Attorney) is also coming to PS4.
Not much great games on the horizon as far as I know of. Not much of a SSB fan.

What are some great releases you are looking forward to?

Metroid Prime 4, Luigis Mansion 3, Daemon X Machina, Yoshi, Bayonetta 3, that leaked Starfox racer, that full Pokemon game out next year (not the watered down one due this November), Dark Souls, that Ubisoft space shooter, and inevitably a ton of indie games.

[Timothy]

Luigi Mansion and Pokemon sound great. Not much a fan of Bayonetta, I already played Dark Souls and most indies on PC and I doubt Metroid will be a Switch title. Probably turns out to be for the Switch U.

But most of the games probably will be on the next console anyway. So therefore I'm not sure about keeping the Switch.

[colacentral]

Metroid Prime 4 has already been announced and the Switch has only been out for 18 months so not sure where you're getting this next console stuff from.

There's going to be Animal Crossing if you're into that sort of thing, and probably a Mario Kart sequel at some point. It's also going to be the ideal way to play any future indie games. There's Mario Party coming too.

If you like Nintendo games I don't see any reason to get rid of it. I'd put money on there being a top-down Zelda for it at some point as they won't be developing those for the 3DS anymore. There'll probably be a Mario Maker sequel and Paper Mario type game.

[The Boston Crab]

Genuine laughter at Metroid not being a Switch release, and then Switch U. Respect.

[Timothy]

Ha, just annoyed that most "new" titles are old Wii U games, thats all.

[Ferris]

What the fuck is the Switch U? Have Nintendo abandoned ship on the Switch and moved to the next console (leaving me bereft of games)?

See my earlier comment, re: them getting it all wrong on purpose to see where people's limits are.

[The Boston Crab]

Psyvariar Delta coming out this week on Switch in the EU, apparently.

It's possibly, arguably, the best shmup on the system. I also understand why some people think it's the best shmup ever. When the pad starts HD rumbling and buzzing away as you're grazing loads of mad bullets and the robotic voice is going LEVEL UP LEVEL UP LEVEL UP LEVEL UPPPPP you will think it's the best thing you've ever done in your whole life.

Held my son in my arms as he's laughing with glee is way below got a one thousand buzz combo on Psyvariar stage one.

[Kelvin]

What the fuck is the Switch U? Have Nintendo abandoned ship on the Switch and moved to the next console (leaving me bereft of games)?

See my earlier comment, re: them getting it all wrong on purpose to see where people's limits are.

There is no next console. Switch is a success, and unless something unforeseeable happens, the most we'll get is an iterative variation on it in a few years, as with the 3DS.

Obviously there's always fake rumours and leaks, but no serious, credible outlet has ever suggested something new is coming.

[Ferris]

There is no next console. Switch is a success, and unless something unforeseeable happens, the most we'll get is an iterative variation on it in a few years, as with the 3DS.

Obviously there's always fake rumours and leaks, but no serious, credible outlet has ever suggested something new is coming.

Ok good.

[Kelvin]

Okay, now that I've stuck up for the useless wankers, next allow me to stick the boot in.

Good god, that NES service is terrible. Unplayably so, imo. Button layout Is awkward and uncomfortable, and it all feels so insultingly rushed and cobbled together. The one positive I can offer is that they've at least ripped off a higher quality of emulator this time, and the games do at least look half decent, compared to the hideous, washed out versions that they previously sold on Wii U.

I reckon I might just hold out and see if they update the games with remappable buttons before attempting to play though the 3 good ones.

Also, as a PSA, there's a good chance your game saves haven't been backed up to the cloud as it only seems to initiate the process when you shut down a game, meaning existing saves in older games are still not backed up. You'll need to go into system, data management, and then manually initiate the process on each game. At least that's my experience. You can also press + on any game at the home screen and update it through there. After that it will update whenever you play them.

I honestly don't know how they can delay the service for so long, and still offer such a broken, slapdash product at the end of it all.

[Mango Chimes]

Gradius might as well just give you one life.

[Twed]

The one positive I can offer is that they've at least ripped off a higher quality of emulator this time

If you've taken away that they ripped off an emulator from the .nes header thing then you may have misunderstood.