Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon

[good times]

I may not have the quote precise but:

"first of all I must say... your handwriting is ex-quisite"

[kalowski]

"Baby Sitting by King Herod."
"Marriage Guidance by King Henry the Eighth"
"Or How to Lose Squash Gracefully by Anne Diamond."

[pigamus]

"They call them bag for life, must have a dozen in the boot of the carrr"

Well yes Alan - not throwing them away is kind of the point!

[Huxleys Babkins]

"Baby Sitting by King Herod."
"Marriage Guidance by King Henry the Eighth"
"Or How to Lose Squash Gracefully by Anne Diamond."

Coogan's delivery on that line is amazing.

https://youtu.be/kZTCIH2t4BA

[Dave The Triffids]

This mental breakdown from MMM s01e05 3 mins in:


(Alan is determined not to mess up his appearance on a fellow NND host's morning show, and has drunk two cups of coffee after arriving far too early to the studio)


Host: ...sounds delicious. So! It's 7:01 and it's time for a review of today's papers with... Alan!

Alan: Right you are! So, I have got some big tits for you tit tits tit-titbit bit tits bits tit titbits! Titbits!

Host: (laughing) Freudian slip there - oh dear sorry about that

Alan: I don't know what the fuss is about really I mean... (gestures having breasts) they're just pointed sacks of fat on the upper torso of a woman for goodness sakes. What's the big deal, people? I mean, you know we've all got our favourite - all got our favourite - um - gland. Mine just happens to be the - uh -mammory-The Independent leads with "Government in Secret Spending Cuts"...

(He reads out yesterday's headlines - because he arrived too early to have picked up the new headlines, and therefore must improvise a traffic report to fill the dead air: "just-just-just-just drive sensibly, for Christ's sakes!")

It's the little wobble in his voice when he says "The Independent" that makes this..

[Bobloblawslawbomb]

For those of you into impressions, Terry Mynott (from The Mimic) regularly does an Alan impression on his twitch stream and it is, to be fair, ruddy good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jmP3LmDbiA

[Magnum Valentino]

Sounds much more like an impression of Steve Coogan. Much more Manchester twang there than Alan has.

[kalowski]

I have a soft spot for anything that has Alan using a go pro type camera (like the rally driver segment on TDT. "A modern camera about the size of a small panatela cigar")

[Mobius]

I love Alan's impression of Giles Brandreth in Nomad

[Mobius]

Does anyone know who voices the caller in MMM Series 2 Episode 1, the one about blowing up Noel Edmonds in Hampton Court

Some of the callers feel very Down The Line

[BeardFaceMan]

I think that one was Dan Skinner.

[buttgammon]

I love Alan's impression of Giles Brandreth in Nomad

Yes, that one's splendid!

[buttgammon]

The way he says his cleaner's name in Oasthouse is seared into my mind. I'm currently trying to teach my pet rabbit his name and have accidentally got him to respond to anything said in that cadence, so he may actually think his name is "Ro-sa".

[jobotic]

"Good therapy or barmy old cack?"

[Mobius]

In Scissored Isle Alan says his dog Seldom only eats boiled eggs but in From The Oasthouse he describes planing the bottom of a door off to pass thin slices of meat to Seldom

[paruses]

"If you speak again I will physically hit you".

Also:

"What is it? WHAT IS IT?"

SADLY neither are well known enough to be said as menacing asides in a meeting, I have discovered.

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

Sounds much more like an impression of Steve Coogan. Much more Manchester twang there than Alan has.

True, but to be fair it's a very accurate impression of Coogan.

[wooders1978]

In Scissored Isle Alan says his dog Seldom only eats boiled eggs but in From The Oasthouse he describes planing the bottom of a door off to pass thin slices of meat to Seldom

Dogs tastes change to be fair - I have rotate to new biscuits every couple of months because my spoilt little bugger turns her nose up

[Captain Z]

But there is also a whole bit in Oasthouse where he boils 16 eggs for Seldom.

[Leej88]

Murderer you killed my son.

[Dave The Triffids]

I'm not sure if it's in I, Partridge, Nomad or Oasthouse (or even in one of those Guardian interviews Partridge sometimes does) but there's a section where Partridge talks about touching Noel Edmonds' leather jacket only for him to wheel round, knock Alan's hand out of the way and "adopt the karate stance".
It's only a throwaway comment but the image it conjures up is absolutely fantastic.

[weaseldust]

will you apologise to finteh?

[popcorn]

Alan talks to a vicar. Don't remember what this is from, one of the Gibbons specials I guess? The guy who plays the vicar does a great job.

[Mobius]

"People have always asked me, why do you hate Edmonds? It makes me laugh. Ha! I don't hate Edmonds. I don't give a shit about Edmonds. I hate the things he does, sure. I hate the way he behaves. I hate his personality and his appearance. But hate Edmonds himself? No, sir. Wouldn't give him the satisfaction."

[alltalknotrousers]

Dogs tastes change to be fair - I have rotate to new biscuits every couple of months because my spoilt little bugger turns her nose up

Also, later in Scissored Isle, Seldom is described as knowing about the Pepperami in the glove compartment

[Norton Canes]

From the latest Popbitch mailout:

"Brian Eno's daughter had an Alan Partridge themed cake at her wedding. [Scroll down; it's worth it]"


It certainly is.

[JamesTC]

Bagsy the DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! slice.

[bobloblaw]

Bagsy the DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! slice.

Needless to say, I had the last slice

[jobotic]

Love the questions.

Did you get fucking hammered?

Did your dad knock anyone out?

[Fambo Number Mive]

Ooh...it's a good cake

I hope they didn't get any chocolate mousse on the pillows during the honeymoon.