Author Topic: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon  (Read 106081 times)

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #960 on: January 16, 2019, 05:43:53 PM »
My accent is a horrible mish-mash of accents and dialects. I like to think it makes me sound like a global citizen, but tbh I probably just sound like a berk. Such is life.

Hey, half-empty/half-full: you might sound like a global berk.

A globerk.

St_Eddie

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #961 on: January 16, 2019, 06:11:16 PM »
I remember being in NYC and asking for a tomato juice, about 5 times, to a very confused waitress. When I said tom-ay-to juice she understood straight away.

A similar thing happened when I went to New York with my family as a kid.  My Mum and Dad asked a New York resident for directions to Battery Park and it just went back and forth for a good minute or so; "where's Battery Park?", "where's Baaa wha?!".  Eventually it snapped and he said, in a heavy New York accent, "ooohhhhhh!  Baaaaattery Park!".

American's are weird like that but then again, I suppose that they're not as exposed to our accents as we are to theirs, what with our cultural adoption of their films and TV, which is a part of everyday life for us, but much more limited to our American cousins, when it comes to their consumption of British media.

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #962 on: January 16, 2019, 08:35:27 PM »
"I have got some big tits for you. Tits. Tits. Tits bits. Tit bits! I don’t know what the fuss is about actually. They’re just pointed sacks of fat on a woman’s upper torso for goodness sakes. What’s the big deal people. I mean we’ve all got our favourite…gland. Mine happens to be the…mammary"

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #963 on: January 16, 2019, 08:47:08 PM »
Just remembered the amazing detail of how Alan's strangled "LYNN! LYNN!!!" in his Toblerone flashback changes effortlessly to a casual "...hello Lynn?" once he picks up the phone. (remembered it because I'm eating Toblerone now, although I haven't yet encountered weight gain/the urge to drive to Dundee in my bare feet)

St_Eddie

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #964 on: January 16, 2019, 10:47:11 PM »
"I have got some big tits for you. Tits. Tits. Tits bits. Tit bits! I don’t know what the fuss is about actually. They’re just pointed sacks of fat on a woman’s upper torso for goodness sakes. What’s the big deal people. I mean we’ve all got our favourite…gland. Mine happens to be the…mammary"

"What is point in pointed sacks?"

"What is point in life?"

Utter Shit

  • Snotty Bumstead
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #965 on: January 17, 2019, 10:41:09 PM »
What is point point-to-point?

græskar

  • I want to dance, can you help me
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #966 on: January 17, 2019, 11:16:40 PM »
"I have got some big tits for you. Tits. Tits. Tits bits. Tit bits! I don’t know what the fuss is about actually. They’re just pointed sacks of fat on a woman’s upper torso for goodness sakes. What’s the big deal people. I mean we’ve all got our favourite…gland. Mine happens to be the…mammary"
...aryTHE INDEPENDENNNNNT"

Mobius

  • he who hingeth aboot getteth hee haw
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #967 on: January 17, 2019, 11:59:53 PM »
Get well soon Eddie Shadow

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #968 on: January 19, 2019, 05:12:52 AM »
Always get tickled by his preposterous hand overs to Dave Clifton. This gem from I'm Alan Partridge S02E04:

It's 1 A M, as the whole of Norfolk sleeps, something truly evil stirs.
His coffin lid opens with a shuddering creak… *creeeeak*
An owl hoots… *DANNY FRANCHETTI'S JAZZ BOX* (sorry that's the new digital system)…

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #969 on: January 19, 2019, 07:13:37 AM »
From that same episode, a perfect moment for our Brexit times:

"Do you want to go to prison? Do you? Do you want to go to prison?"
"You tell me prison is very cushy. It’s like holiday camps."
"I was making a point about something else."

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #970 on: January 25, 2019, 07:34:11 PM »
'it's called an aereolator'

QDRPHNC

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #971 on: January 25, 2019, 07:54:13 PM »
A pint of bitter and a plate of crackers, please!

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #972 on: January 25, 2019, 07:58:13 PM »
(after having a big shit at the bravery awards)

"I should get a bravery award for that"

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #973 on: January 26, 2019, 02:37:53 AM »
(after having a big shit at the bravery awards)

"I should get a bravery award for that"

“...she drove off”

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #974 on: January 26, 2019, 08:28:38 AM »
“...she drove off”

"Beep beep, room for a brave one?"

The Lurker

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #975 on: January 29, 2019, 04:54:56 PM »
"There have been more complaints from farmers about, well, what you said"
"How many?"
"50"
"Oh, your age"

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #976 on: January 29, 2019, 07:15:14 PM »
A pint of bitter and a plate of crackers, please!

A pipe of Pringles will suffice...

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #977 on: January 29, 2019, 07:32:03 PM »
A pipe of Pringles will suffice...
Not a crescent of crisps?

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #978 on: January 29, 2019, 07:36:46 PM »
Sack Lynn for being unloyal – disloyal, and for joining in fun in a way that excludes her employer. And sack her for being an absolute idiot, and inefficient. Then, can you call Bill Oddie and - That’s something else.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #979 on: January 29, 2019, 07:37:24 PM »
A pipe of Pringles will suffice...

“A clump of cress”
« Last Edit: January 29, 2019, 08:12:04 PM by FerriswheelBueller »

Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #980 on: January 30, 2019, 02:06:19 AM »

Norton Canes

  • The leper heart will see you for what you are
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #981 on: January 30, 2019, 01:13:49 PM »
Sack Lynn for being unloyal – disloyal

I think that might actually be my favourite Partridge utterance of all time.

Cuellar

  • Push off my wire
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #982 on: January 30, 2019, 01:39:53 PM »
"When I get stressed, I drive 50 miles to an out of town Asda and do my shopping dressed as a sexy woman. As I walk round the aisles I can hear the other customers saying who the hell...is that sexy woman the time is eleven thirty"

Hard to convey just how funny I find the delivery of that final sentence and I probably got the time wrong.

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #983 on: January 30, 2019, 02:15:55 PM »
"It's Mid Morning Matters Thursday Book Club or..." (presses button) "Mid Morning Matter Thursday...Book Club"

St_Eddie

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #984 on: January 30, 2019, 02:16:37 PM »
Sad to hear that your man there, James, is feeling bad.  It wasn't his, or any of the actors, fault that the reunion show was a right of royal shitshow.  Not the actors fault.  Producers fault.  Bunch of clueless idiots.

EDIT: Wrong thread, obviously.  iPhone 7's being a cunt.  Want to copy & paste?  Don't buy a iPhone 7.
« Last Edit: January 30, 2019, 02:36:04 PM by St_Eddie »

Chollis

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #985 on: January 30, 2019, 02:20:06 PM »
I think that might actually be my favourite Partridge utterance of all time.

Was just thinking the same.

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #986 on: January 30, 2019, 02:22:39 PM »
"Thatcher pop four piece: Duran Duran."

gilbertharding

  • Not even the rudest man in the Beatles
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #987 on: January 30, 2019, 02:30:37 PM »
Sad to hear that your man there, James, is feeling bad.  It wasn't his, or any of the actors fault that the reunion show was a right of royal shitshow.  Not the actors fault.  Producers fault.  Bunch of clueless idiots.

Should have booked Bill Oddie.

kalowski

  • Sooner or later
Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #988 on: January 30, 2019, 02:30:51 PM »
I have just been falling over with laughter at the "disguised voice" during the addiction action section.

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

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Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
« Reply #989 on: January 30, 2019, 02:32:21 PM »
Sad to hear that your man there, James, is feeling bad.  It wasn't his, or any of the actors fault that the reunion show was a right of royal shitshow.  Not the actors fault.  Producers fault.  Bunch of clueless idiots.

That sounds like a *completely* forgotten gem from the Alan Partridge canon.
(Don't worry, readers; I know that The Boy Eddie has posted this "Inbetweeners" related comment in the wrong thread, really! ; ) )