Author Topic: Gruesome Trevor.  (Read 15978 times)

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #90 on: August 28, 2017, 01:50:20 AM »
Gruesome Trevor subjects the Chinese family across the way to a lecture in British ethics, before going home and doing a massive dump and examining and smelling it for half an hour.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #91 on: August 29, 2017, 09:32:57 AM »
"By jove, by junket, by dumpling dee, if ye spy a darkie, bad luck to thee!"

Grue's daughter regrets letting him speak at her wedding.

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #92 on: August 29, 2017, 10:14:17 AM »
Gruesome Trevor throws up into his dungaree pocket after eating one too many squid and gooseberry sandwiches.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #93 on: August 29, 2017, 09:46:15 PM »
Bove trots out the old cliche "Not gay just curious" when he is caught wanking over pictures of Dale Winton printed off the Internet. For the local Women's Institute, coffee morning will never feel quite the same again.

JoeyBananaduck

  • Blame It On Mom
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #94 on: August 29, 2017, 10:40:00 PM »
Bove trots out the old cliche "Not gay just curious" when he is caught wanking over pictures of Dale Winton printed off the Internet. For the local Women's Institute, coffee morning will never feel quite the same again.

And what does Gruesome Trevor do about it?

Smeraldina Rima

  • A slug-ridden cabbage
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #95 on: August 29, 2017, 10:58:37 PM »
Trevor sometimes transforms into Bovine Tom:

"By Jenkins, by Bradbury, I'll not have no darkies!" Easy Tom, not all the checkout staff can be white!

It's a bit like Twin Peaks. Trevor puts a mouse's heart inside a dissected Action Man and the mouse slowly dies. Giving up on his plan to see Action Man experience love he throws the piece of plastic in the stinky number 2s bin and adds the mouse heart to his meatballs.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #96 on: August 30, 2017, 05:15:38 AM »
And what does Gruesome Trevor do about it?

He complains to the relevant authorities about the lack of privacy at the local community centre. "It was a quiet afternoon, and no one was around!", he storms. "The caretaker should have locked the doors on his way out, by cracky! Would have certainly prevented a load of moaning woman from just swanning in and disturbing my solitary pleasure-fest!"

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #97 on: September 02, 2017, 07:31:51 AM »
GrueTrev pushes various small vegetables into his neighbour's toilet door keyhole, in order to stop him getting out.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #98 on: September 03, 2017, 06:55:01 PM »
Trevor sometimes transforms into Bovine Tom

He certainly does, Smeraldina, and by ironic coincidence, Tom sometimes finds that he's "gorn all gruesome!"

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #99 on: September 04, 2017, 09:29:40 AM »
Gruesome Trevor is peckish at 3 am after getting in from a local lynching. He decides to cook a 7 bird roast, a Robin being the center piece, but he's run out of stuffing. No bread in the house, so he empties his parents urn and mixes Mum and Pa's ashes in with some corned beef and vinegar. The Moore Hen is not fatty enough, throws the whole thing in the bin.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #100 on: September 04, 2017, 09:59:11 AM »
Trevor gets his father's old hunting rifle out of the wardrobe and goes out onto heath and shoots a noisy youth in the head. He just shoots him, point blank, without a second thought.

Smeraldina Rima

  • A slug-ridden cabbage
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #101 on: September 04, 2017, 11:43:36 PM »
Trevor opens an undercover child torture facility beneath the floorboards of Grue's Vegan Greengrocers. To keep the five-o off the trail, Trevor buys a few satsumas and lettuces from Morrisons and resells them at near face value, the lettuce cheaper because he uses the leaves to wipe bogies, the satsumas more expensive to make up for the lettuce loss leader.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #102 on: September 15, 2017, 12:46:50 AM »
Trev posts dog excretia to some non-whites who live round the crescent.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #103 on: September 16, 2017, 10:50:02 PM »
GT pushes a midget under Mrs. Figsworth's lawnmower.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #104 on: September 18, 2017, 07:31:46 AM »
GT names and shames a local foreigner, by distributing Photostat copies of  a passion letter he writes describing said non-Englander as "smelly, awful and degenerate." He celebrates his small victory in the small community of Plumnuts with a vigorous knob-wash, finishing with a satisfying dump which lingers on the palette for literally hours.

Smeraldina Rima

  • A slug-ridden cabbage
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #105 on: September 18, 2017, 11:03:36 AM »
Having run out of Parmesan, Gruesome Trevor grates himself.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #106 on: September 20, 2017, 04:10:48 AM »
Gruesome moulds a life-size model of himself out of found dog-shits.

Smeraldina Rima

  • A slug-ridden cabbage
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #107 on: September 20, 2017, 01:16:08 PM »
Gruesome Trevor hangs around the Whirling Waltzers as the fair comes to town and eventually he offers to take over for a while so the spinner can have a fag and a candy floss. He takes a leaf out of the book of the man on his break but also intentionally skims himself on the cars as he dances around the curved rotating floor completely dazzled by the combination of energy drinks he'd taken. The spinner comes back from his break and Trevor goes to lie down underneath the Orbiter to see if it will land on him.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #108 on: September 21, 2017, 08:32:21 AM »
Trevor concocts a cocktail of his own design, using paraffin, meths and a prize selection of good, British beefs.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #109 on: September 22, 2017, 03:25:03 AM »
"By UKIP, b'Stormfront, b'BNP, I say nay lad, we shall not have the foreign likes of ye here!" declares Grue, whilst shitting and wanking in a costal area.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #110 on: September 22, 2017, 06:20:02 PM »
Gruesome likes to rummage in the bins behind the local Aldi of a Friday's eve. Never know what gruesome morsels one might find to add to the pot!

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #111 on: September 23, 2017, 11:43:30 PM »
Gruesome Trevor gets a lifetime ban from the aquatics department of the garden centre for tickling the carp.

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #112 on: September 25, 2017, 11:35:16 AM »
Gruesome Trevor awakes blearily late on a Saturday morning, having consumed 10 pints of Guinness in a darkened corner of the Poacher and Pissflap followed by a bhuna from the takeaway across the road. He looks over to the small cage on his nightstand, the Canary lies dead in the bottom of it.

"thought so" he says.

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #113 on: September 25, 2017, 02:25:48 PM »
Gruesome Trevor terrorizes an old childhood nemesis and his family who have moved into the area by wearing a costume made of salmon skin, figs,glow sticks and pigs trotters and scuttling around in the garden screaming a blood curdling scream.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #114 on: September 26, 2017, 08:20:03 PM »
"Be ye morsel, nor muggins, I'm coming for thee!" cries Grue every morn, before assailing the milkman with rabid anti-Semite nonsense.

Smeraldina Rima

  • A slug-ridden cabbage
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #115 on: September 27, 2017, 03:09:31 PM »
After one too many deep penile insertions, Grue's pisses are now two second splashes, liquid jobbies.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #116 on: September 27, 2017, 03:22:26 PM »
On the bus one afternoon, Gruesome lectures an old Filipino woman about the value of good British ethics. He then diarrheas himself all over the shop, and people laugh at his harsh, angry face.

Glebe

  • Wobbly caper!
Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #117 on: September 28, 2017, 11:02:58 AM »
"By Branson, by jove; by brisket, by Bronson; by tinker, by gypsy, by gum; I'll not have my country ruined by the overuse of toilet paper and sanitary products, aye, as is, by cracky! by Norris."

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #118 on: September 28, 2017, 01:24:08 PM »
Gruesome Trevor gets a job in a children's nursery but gets sacked on his first day for stapling a nappy directly onto a baby's skin.

Re: Gruesome Trevor.
« Reply #119 on: September 29, 2017, 02:41:06 AM »
Gruesome Trevor uses a snorkel tube to suck his eyeball out, then he peers up his nose