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Euphoria II: The Fertile Brain.

Started by Glebe, June 24, 2017, 09:51:50 AM

Previous topic - Next topic
A tree frog comes skidding down your winder pane like a fuckin space invader, croaking out this weekends lottery numbers.

You steal the keys to a church organ and drive a cathedral south, flattening everything out into an eternal midlands.

#662
A line of chaffinches doing the "oops upside your head" dance across a confused cow's arse.

You trigger the new post glitch and write some shit to cancel it out, aren't you NICE

Spoon of Ploff

Karl's operation to let him shit through his penis is a complete success.

Fishfinger

Quote from: Spoon of Ploff on March 05, 2019, 05:44:46 PM
Karl's operation to let him shit through his penis is a complete success.

Later, he would marry Jenny von Westphalen, grow hair, and write seminal works that would inform controversial political movements. Buried in London. Now here's Carol with the weather.

Glebe

Ronald finds a lovely plum in his handbag!

ToneLa

The three best words in any language

And. Your... Away!

Honestly if you can't understand the simple joy of that sheer uncompromising freedom then I must have to subjugate you in a carpark under uncompassionate orange light in a fuckin boot... And I don't even drive!!

ToneLa

You release your exhortations at a young lady with a rhythm section and she is entirely compassionate towards your sense of, let's be Francis here lads, boogie

ToneLa

You fuckin learn tae suck on yir ain cock

rasta-spouse

A hooded youth comes towards you on a dark street. Christ, what's that glinting in his hand? It's a business card with the urls to some of his Firefly fanfiction that you'll really enjoy!


Ferris

Being pleasantly tired at the end of a long day wheeling your infant son about in his pram on a very long walk going nowhere in particular. 6 more months off work to do the same again.

No booze for me, squire - I'm after a decent night's sleep. 11pm? Time for me to hit the hay!

(Until he wakes me up at 4am, eh readers?!)

Glebe

A delicious coffee cake is washed down with the perfect cuppa!

Pingers

A real life one:

In November I planted a damson tree on some open land near me (this is in an inner city suburb, aka 'the front line'). I love damsons, not just for their flavour but because they have gone out of fashion - they make me think of an older England, an idealised Hardy-esque bucolic where people eat water cress out of unpolluted streams and pluck damsons and now-cancelled varieties of apple from abundant orchards on their walk home. So I like the idea of planting fruit trees in urban areas for anyone to enjoy.

On my way home today I noticed that someone else has planted a plum and an apple near to my damson. I can only assume that they have done this after seeing my little tree. If the council cunts leave these alone then we have the beginnings of a little orchard in our neighbourhood.

The fact that someone followed suit, particularly at the end of what has been a shit couple of weeks for me where I've struggled to see the good in anyone, is perfect.

Glebe

Quote from: Pingers on March 15, 2019, 06:20:32 PMI love damsons, not just for their flavour but because they have gone out of fashion - they make me think of an older England, an idealised Hardy-esque bucolic where people eat water cress out of unpolluted streams and pluck damsons and now-cancelled varieties of apple from abundant orchards on their walk home. So I like the idea of planting fruit trees in urban areas for anyone to enjoy.

That's fantastic, Pingers.

ToneLa

Yir sister gave you twenty bar so instead of poisoning your soul with K cider, you get in a load of Birra Moretti and you're away!

Glebe

A delicious cupcake brings joy and light to already smashing day!

pancreas

It is a cupcake made of human shit! Which is perfect as you are a coprophage!

Glebe


Fishfinger

Martin Amis swivels twice, ruminatively, on his expensive desk chair, enjoying the aroma of his ass-towel. Then the epiphany. He smirks and leans forward to tap the name Tod Friendly into his WordPerfect document. Yes. A vast and clever improvement upon Holly Caust. He rises, approaching the mirror, ciggie dangling from impertinent lips. You delicious genius, he thinks. The bathrobe parts as he reaches for his cock.


I'm pretty sure this actually happened.

Glebe

The entire Hi-De-Hi! cast bliss out to the sound of Swervedriver and look out to sea as the sun goes down behind them.

Heat. People gather, laffter, golden bubbles in light.

seepage

Quote from: Foggy Buntwhistle on April 20, 2019, 08:56:58 AM
Heat. People gather, laffter, golden bubbles in light.

mens' shorts spoil the fun, though

Glebe

A gentle, multi-coloured bubble comes bobbin' down with joy and goodness!

Ferris

Inside and warm on a wet rainy day

Fishfinger

#685
Sara Pascoe does a big old laugh right into your ear. Just once though. Be a bit much otherwise.

Fishfinger

There's more affordable, own-brand whiskey in your blood than actual corpuscules. Whatever they are. You used to know.

Glebe

You perform only a limited number of errands and remain relatively scent-free of 'em, mate.

Glebe

We haven't heard from the Fluffin in awhile, but by cracky he's back with a vengeance!

Glebe

You abandon negative social media and stop living in your head and forget all negativity and cruelty and hate and rediscover the joys of fresh air and lovely places!