Just been invited to a mass organised orgy

[Neville Chamberlain]

She does, but he doesn't know if that'd make him happy either. Maybe he should give it a go. Only he doesn't know where to start.

I don't want to this to go much further. I'll talk to my friend, see what he thinks...

[Danger Man]

Jesus fuck. The man's a fucking machine.

The Ron Jeremy of marriage

[Soup]

Life's too short for me to have a dry cock

My cock's too short for me to have a dry life

[mothman]

A friend of mine has had sex with his wife about five times in the past five years, and each one of those occasions was instigated by him. To be honest, my friend says, although his wife consented as long as it was over quickly, it started to feel a bit rape-y and now he no longer bothers, despite talking to her about how the total lack of intimacy in their relationship is giving rise to all sorts of feelings of anger, sadness and resentment. Anyway, my friend wonders, what are his options now? :-(

Our decrease has been gradual over a long time, but it's not got that bad yet (or as dire at the situation at Nose Towers). As to why, it's difficult to describe, there are many possible reasons I don't fully understand or feel comfortable about going into here right now. She doesn't like to talk about it. I make light of the situation - which is my default mode for just about everything - but it doesn't go down well. I don't think she's cheating on me: just because she's the person she is (plus there are the practical/logistic demands it would make; she doesn't have the time!). Things usually improve - dramatically! - when we're on holiday, especially given we're returning to our favourite destination; if they don't this time, then, well, maybe the conversation we avoid havng will need to take place.

[ASFTSN]

- but it doesn't go down well.

I tried so hard not to quote this I am sorry.

Re:  the holiday thing - that would suggest to me that it might be all a bit stress related?  When you're on holiday you're both a bit more relaxed and so things are working out more like you'd prefer?  For all the talk about sex being a stress reliever I find nothing puts me off more than when I'm an anxiety/stress ridden wreck.

[Mr_Simnock]

One thing you don't here these days much is that you don't HAVE to have sex in a marriage for it to be happy, you really don't. All to often people get hung up about it too much.

[mothman]

I tried so hard not to quote this I am sorry.

Oh, behave!

Re:  the holiday thing - that would suggest to me that it might be all a bit stress related?  When you're on holiday you're both a bit more relaxed and so things are working out more like you'd prefer?  For all the talk about sex being a stress reliever I find nothing puts me off more than when I'm an anxiety/stress ridden wreck.

Almost certainly. We have a child with lots of issues, by the time we're finished dealing with that we just want to sleep. This is one of the aforementioned issues.

One thing you don't here these days much is that you don't HAVE to have sex in a marriage for it to be happy, you really don't. All to often people get hung up about it too much.

This is true. It's annoying and, yes, frustrating, but it's not the end of the world. This is what would probably not make me a good swinger, or member of SNG's mate's orgy-club (as I'm not sure they're necessarily the same thing). There's a certain mindset I'm lacking.

[Shit Good Nose]

One thing you don't here these days much is that you don't HAVE to have sex in a marriage for it to be happy, you really don't. All to often people get hung up about it too much.

Yes, for all the issues here, we (and I) are otherwise happy.  In my case it's a case of no sex but a happy life, or sex but facing constant accusations and not being able to do or say anything right.

[José]

my missus wanked me off on the reg when both my arms were in casts, without the slightest hint of a grumble.
that's the definition of true love right there.

[Soup]

my mum wanked me off on the reg when both my arms were absolutely fine.

[drummersaredeaf]

What if you splurted up the rigid sleeve?

[drummersaredeaf]

Oh. YOUR arms.

[paruses]

What if you splurted up the rigid sleeve?

they're all rigid sleeves after I've....etc

[José]

oi, my arms are the requisite length for self pleasure you cunt.

[Shit Good Nose]

oi, my arms are the requisite length for self pleasure you cunt.

SUUUUURE they are.  We've all seen a T-Rex trying to wank...

[Shit Good Nose]

So the christmas fuckfest in Ibiza (Ib-itza) came...and came...and came and went.

Lots of fucking, basically.  Presents, non jizzy ones, were exchanged as well.

Sounded like a few of them were hoping to get jiggy in the sea and do some public shagging, but they didn't realise that it's a not a year-round summer place and the weather was like late autumn/early winter here whilst the sea was cock smalleningly cold, so they stayed in the house.

Those that attended enjoyed it, though, and they're considering going to another country again next (this) christmas.

I hope to have some more juicy details in the coming days, as I only briefly spoke to my mate about it for a few minutes this afternoon.

As Brucie used to say - keeeeeeeeeeeep fucking!

Not had any updates over the last few months due to an apparent combination of illnesses and work (most of the "meets" were cancelled as a result), but I've been told about this year's christmas fuckfest - they're going to combine the fucking with a ski holiday, somewhere in France.  They've booked a massive lodge somewhere and have hired two instructors (who won't be invited to the fucking...) for those that have never skid before.  Also they're welcoming their first transgender member!  Male to female.  I'm not sure how far into the change they are, but apparently a couple of the other members are particularly excited about it. 

Good to hear that in amongst all the depravity there's a good positive inclusivity story here.

[biggytitbo]

Wouldn't it be cheaper just to book a room upstairs in a pub?

[Shit Good Nose]

Wouldn't it be cheaper just to book a room upstairs in a pub?

Well yes, but let's just say quite a few of the members are comfortably well off and like a bit of luxury.  Also, due to the size of the group and number of members that usually go on these things (between 20 and 25), even the higher-end pricy jaunts end up being quite reasonably priced once the cost is shared out (this ski one is working out to about £250 each - that includes flights, accommodation for the week [over christmas], ski passes and instructors).

[mothman]

Plus it's probably how they started off. Onwards and upwards, as it were.

[Cuellar]

Are any of them at all sexy though (if you say yes I'm going to fall into a deep depression)

[Shit Good Nose]

Are any of them at all sexy though (if you say yes I'm going to fall into a deep depression)

Yes - I've seen pics of some of them.  BUT there are several who are, objectively, "uggos" and others who are average/normal/whatever you want to call them.  I've said before that the most popular male member of the group is a very average looking middle aged bloke, but he's popular with the lady members (he doesn't swing both ways like a few of the other members) because he's a top cocksman.

I'm regularly told that in this group attractiveness is held fairly low in consideration.

[biggytitbo]

Well yes, but let's just say quite a few of the members are comfortably well off and like a bit of luxury.  Also, due to the size of the group and number of members that usually go on these things (between 20 and 25)...

A leisure centre then.

[SteveDave]

A leisure centre then.

Or an All Bar One

[Shit Good Nose]

Or an All Bar One

At £7 a pint?!?!?!  Don't think so... Nice chips, though.

[Cuellar]

Yes - I've seen pics of some of them. 

CHRIST

[Shit Good Nose]

CHRIST

NOT mid-fucking... Just normal, fully clothed pics from FB (they're all FB friends, but there isn't a FB Fuckfest group).

[Cuellar]

It was more a cry of anguish that actual sexy people do this - there's a world of sexy people doing sex things and I'm not involved.

[Shit Good Nose]

Surely it's worse that there's a world of uggos doing sex things and you're not involved?

[biggytitbo]

You could actually hire an old refurbished warehouse out for this for less than a £1000, invite as many people as you want, get some bouncing castles, paddling pool, hot dog stalls in etc.

[BlodwynPig]

Surely it's worse that there's a world of uggos doing sex things and you're not involved?

Rather be all "uggos".

"Like swine, I writhe in the filth of your souls" (Deke Strang in Minotaur 9)