CaB memes you don't understand

[Cerys]

Never been sure about the origins of 'smerky let plekry', despite it being a very pleasing combination of letters.  Presume it was contained in a drunk post.  You don't see it much these days.

Tum te tum te tum....

[touchingcloth]

Thanks, Dex, and double thanks to Consignia for the twofer. Please take my balls and do with them as you will.

[zomgmouse]

Also, the Waxwork Rene thread is one of the funniest things I've ever witnessed on CaB, and I'm glad the old rascal still pops up from time to time.

Someone once explained Waxwork René to me (I think it was Mr Simnock at a meet) but I've since forgotten. What is this?

[Glebe]

Someone once explained Waxwork René to me (I think it was Mr Simnock at a meet) but I've since forgotten. What is this?

And it's all thanks to Louis Tussaud's House of Wax, Great Yarmouth.

[zomgmouse]

And it's all thanks to Louis Tussaud's House of Wax, Great Yarmouth.

But what is it

[Bum Flaps]

But what is it

It's the one on the left.

[Consignia]

Thanks, Dex, and double thanks to Consignia for the twofer. Please take my balls and do with them as you will.

ありがと。あんたの玉を抜いました

[touchingcloth]

ありがと。あんたの玉を抜いました

Desu desu desu amen desu.

[machotrouts]

FWIW I think people should post more pictures of their willies here. I would be happy to rate them.

It's shocking how long I've been waiting for a thread dedicated to cocks of the mentally disturbed. Get on with it, everybody

[touchingcloth]

Here's my penis:

[pancreas]

Here's my penis:

When I look at the image you have linked it says it is not found. That means your penis is invisibly small. 0/10 for touchingcloth's penis amirite.

[touchingcloth]

That's measuring along the top though so 2/10 if going from the balls.

[Cerys]

Let's just post pictures of willies.

[pancreas]

That's measuring along the top though so 2/10 if going from the balls.

Sorry mate you don't get to rate your own penis amirite.

[pancreas]

Let's just post pictures of willies.

Hello! 8/10 great penis amirite.

[touchingcloth]

Sorry mate you don't get to rate your own penis amirite.

Ill rate you're penis if your not careful mate and u kno what all that homosexualing does 2 a penis

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

On "mate", I've always processed that in a darker way than how Adam and Joe used to say it. They would always draw out the aaaaaa and if you were to pen a transcript of one of their shows you'd probably punctuate the word with an exclamation mark, whereas I've always read a CaB "mate" as terse, annoyed and very much punctuated with a full step. Mate.

A CaB "mate" should also be uttered with a disappointed sigh.

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

But what is it

As Glebe explained, it's a haunted-looking effigy of Rene from a third-rate wax museum in Great Yarmouth. That's all, really.

[Ambient Sheep]

Making a possibly risky assumption here, which is that being a young-ish resident of Australia, zomgmouse may not actually know who René is.  Hence my following reply:

But what is it

A waxwork of René Artois, the lead character in long-running and oft-repeated 1980s British sitcom 'Allo 'Allo!, as played by actor Gorden Kaye.

Wikipedia doesn't mention if the show was broadcast in Australia, but apparently ABC sell DVDs of it there, so they probably did at one point.

[Dex Sawash]

I assumed waxwork rené was a band and there were probably loads of threads in oscillations.

[Cerys]

Waxwork Réné really has to become a band name.

[Glebe]

Waxwork Réné really has to become a band name.

The problem is they'd melt under the stage lights.

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

Waxwork Rene will never melt. Waxwork Rene is immortal.

[zomgmouse]

Making a possibly risky assumption here, which is that being a young-ish resident of Australia, zomgmouse may not actually know who René is.  Hence my following reply:

A waxwork of René Artois, the lead character in long-running and oft-repeated 1980s British sitcom 'Allo 'Allo!, as played by actor Gorden Kaye.

Wikipedia doesn't mention if the show was broadcast in Australia, but apparently ABC sell DVDs of it there, so they probably did at one point.

The show is definitely known here. I figured that that was the protagonist of the show. I was just wondering if there was more to it than just a bad wax figure but apparently not!

As Glebe explained, it's a haunted-looking effigy of Rene from a third-rate wax museum in Great Yarmouth. That's all, really.

I think I get it now.

[sick as a pike]

I thought the value was that it's the one figure among many which, by accident or design, actually looks representative. Among all the "...so, is that supposed to be Gary Lineker ...or Denis Healey?" there is one profound, noble figure, confused to be surrounded by piss-weak simulacra

[Gurke and Hare]

For fucks sake, I didn't read that thread, but I made almost the same joke as my last sentence here as I did there:

I'm a fucking broken record.

The main Fawlty Towers thread in the Comedy Forum has lots of people saying their favourite thing about the show, and then when it gets bumped six months later saying pretty much all the same things again. It's great.

As Glebe explained, it's a haunted-looking effigy of Rene from a third-rate wax museum in Great Yarmouth. That's all, really.

Well, that's going in the testimonials section on their website.

[weaseldust]

Dismissing someone with a simple, weary, devastating "Mate" is one of my favourite recent CaB memes, but it appears to have faded away now.

Mate.

Also, the Waxwork Rene thread is one of the funniest things I've ever witnessed on CaB, and I'm glad the old rascal still pops up from time to time.

YES!

that was me! i am waxwork rene. i don't even know who the original rene is, which is probably why he's at the edge of the picture which i think is what made it good

original thread (images are gone sadly):
http://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,26875.msg1405882.html

p sure the guardian and others stole my fucking photos for various articles. i sometimes wonder if i'm partly responsible for the closure of that place. haha.

[thenoise]

Favourite bamlem moment: the time we chad that heavy snowfall and someone pissed it in the snow. I might have dreamt this, but it was still great.

Verbwhore/Cabber: I like 'CooBooCrew', although I have never actually used it before.

[zomgmouse]

I'm really sad our forum minced oaths went away, and though I do absolutely and wholeheartedly relish the ability to say "cunt", there's a wee small part of me that wishes it still said "mimsy woo woo". Partly I have fond associations due to the fact that a bit of wordplay relating to that term led to one of my very first karma points.
Though while we're here, where did these minced oaths come from and who made them up?

[weekender]

From memory, Barry Admin was getting mildly frustrated with Huzzie not being able to spell the word 'the', so he introduced the functionality that replaced 'tee ee haitch' with 'THE FUCKING THE' (or something like that), on the grounds that it might be funny.  This functionality is still here today, as you cannot write 'THE', 'Cecil Parkinson', or 'the' without it being auto-corrected to something else, as I found out when I was writing this post.

So, once the first experiment was an obvious and resounding success, he started doing it with other phrases such as the one you mentioned above. 

Once he'd tasted power though, he couldn't stop.  He did it with more and more phrases, laughing manically as us minions wondered what was going on.

There's a few other tell-tale issues, but this was basically how Barry Admin became the power-crazed Nazi that still runs the forum to this day.

Don't believe me about the Nazi thing?  Let's take a look at the latest post he's made:

As for running the bunker, I assign staff to stock and research at the same time. I believe they still produce the same amount when they're doing both things, but your supplies will run out quicker.

Had a bad run with research there, like 5 weapon camos in a row over the whole week. Still loving my incendiary bullets, and thermal heavy sniper scope though.

As I understand it, these are behind-the-scenes codes for how to run a forum.  The 'bunker' is obviously CaB, 'stock' is Paypal donations, 'research' is how many times someone clicks the Amazon banner which supports CaB.

I'm not sure about the full meaning of the second sentence, but I think it's clear that with this post I have proven that this forum is being run by a Nazi who treats CaB as a war zone.

If it weren't for the fact that I fully sympathise with Nazi ideals I wouldn't stay here, I really wouldn't.