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Film cliches you want to fuck off

Started by popcorn, September 25, 2017, 01:48:30 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Dr Rock

I suppose All About Eve is this genre, except the understudy, although perfectly talented, is a schemer looking to steal the part, not get it by fortune.

(IIRC)

Ignatius_S

Quote from: thecuriousorange on October 04, 2017, 08:47:39 PM
Crime lab staff/FBI computer boffins being able to zoom in on a blocky low-res image and "enhance' it with magic software. This creates new pixels that were never there to begin with and impossible HD detail.
It is hastily explained with a few meaningless mumbo-jumbo techy sounding terms and buzzwords.

Do they still do this? I remember first baulking at it happening in some 90s X Files episode. You can see in the clip it's been pretty rife.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Vxq9yj2pVWk

I suspect that was a continuation of how forensic science had been traditionally portrayed. For example, it was a modern version of what Dragnet was doing from the 1940s; although it wasn't the first crime procedural drama in the US, it was by far the most influential one.  Information would come back from the crime lab (usually from Ray Pinker, who was featured in the video game, LA Noire) sometimes at a surprisingly quick rate.

Partly, this was done for reasons of expediency, which I suspect was the reason why so many shows used the kind of thing you're talking about. However, it's worth noting that Dragnet at the same time showed police investigation to often be a laborious process and in an single episode, the case could be worked on for months.

Going back to what you were talking about in today's television, it's now very common for it to be played for laughs.

Ignatius_S

Quote from: Dr Rock on October 06, 2017, 01:05:18 PM
I suppose All About Eve is this genre, except the understudy, although perfectly talented, is a schemer looking to steal the part, not get it by fortune.

(IIRC)

That's a great film to use as a comparison as it's related but quite a different beast –more of a dark flipside.

AsparagusTrevor

Quote from: Ignatius_S on October 06, 2017, 01:17:21 PM
Quote from: thecuriousorange on October 04, 2017, 08:47:39 PM
Crime lab staff/FBI computer boffins being able to zoom in on a blocky low-res image and "enhance' it with magic software. This creates new pixels that were never there to begin with and impossible HD detail.
It is hastily explained with a few meaningless mumbo-jumbo techy sounding terms and buzzwords.

Do they still do this? I remember first baulking at it happening in some 90s X Files episode. You can see in the clip it's been pretty rife.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Vxq9yj2pVWk

I suspect that was a continuation of how forensic science had been traditionally portrayed. For example, it was a modern version of what Dragnet was doing from the 1940s; although it wasn't the first crime procedural drama in the US, it was by far the most influential one.  Information would come back from the crime lab (usually from Ray Pinker, who was featured in the video game, LA Noire) sometimes at a surprisingly quick rate.

Partly, this was done for reasons of expediency, which I suspect was the reason why so many shows used the kind of thing you're talking about. However, it's worth noting that Dragnet at the same time showed police investigation to often be a laborious process and in an single episode, the case could be worked on for months.

Going back to what you were talking about in today's television, it's now very common for it to be played for laughs.

Yeah there's been plenty of parodies of this the most recent one I saw was in an episode of Preacher where the protagonist tried to get a VHS enhanced by some boffins in a shop which they failed to do adequately.

One of the most egregious examples played-straight was Enemy of the State where they manage to fucking rotate a still image in 3 dimensions to see an object hidden behind someone. That was a real 'shout "FUCK OFF!" at the screen' moment.

Brundle-Fly

I was watching that UK/French TV drama, The Tunnel recently and I think the serial killer using a voice changer has to now bow out gracefully. I think the Saw franchise took it to its natural conclusion.

Brundle-Fly

Quote from: AsparagusTrevor on October 06, 2017, 01:42:30 PM
I suspect that was a continuation of how forensic science had been traditionally portrayed. For example, it was a modern version of what Dragnet was doing from the 1940s; although it wasn't the first crime procedural drama in the US, it was by far the most influential one.  Information would come back from the crime lab (usually from Ray Pinker, who was featured in the video game, LA Noire) sometimes at a surprisingly quick rate.

Partly, this was done for reasons of expediency, which I suspect was the reason why so many shows used the kind of thing you're talking about. However, it's worth noting that Dragnet at the same time showed police investigation to often be a laborious process and in an single episode, the case could be worked on for months.

Going back to what you were talking about in today's television, it's now very common for it to be played for laughs.

Yeah there's been plenty of parodies of this the most recent one I saw was in an episode of Preacher where the protagonist tried to get a VHS enhanced by some boffins in a shop which they failed to do adequately.

One of the most egregious examples played-straight was Enemy of the State where they manage to fucking rotate a still image in 3 dimensions to see an object hidden behind someone. That was a real 'shout "FUCK OFF!" at the screen' moment.

The best 'zoom into an image/ small detail reveal' I've seen recently that was entirely justified is in Philomena (2013) of all films.

AsparagusTrevor

I'd love to see a scene where someone presses 'enhance' on an image in a movie and this appears:


Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: AsparagusTrevor on October 06, 2017, 01:42:30 PM
I suspect that was a continuation of how forensic science had been traditionally portrayed. For example, it was a modern version of what Dragnet was doing from the 1940s; although it wasn't the first crime procedural drama in the US, it was by far the most influential one.  Information would come back from the crime lab (usually from Ray Pinker, who was featured in the video game, LA Noire) sometimes at a surprisingly quick rate.

Partly, this was done for reasons of expediency, which I suspect was the reason why so many shows used the kind of thing you're talking about. However, it's worth noting that Dragnet at the same time showed police investigation to often be a laborious process and in an single episode, the case could be worked on for months.

Going back to what you were talking about in today's television, it's now very common for it to be played for laughs.

Yeah there's been plenty of parodies of this the most recent one I saw was in an episode of Preacher where the protagonist tried to get a VHS enhanced by some boffins in a shop which they failed to do adequately.

One of the most egregious examples played-straight was Enemy of the State where they manage to fucking rotate a still image in 3 dimensions to see an object hidden behind someone. That was a real 'shout "FUCK OFF!" at the screen' moment.

They can actually do that sort of thing these days though. Subtle difference in reflected light allows them to construct an image from a different vantage point to what the camera was originally in.

It only works in lab conditions and is quite ropey though.


Bazooka

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on October 06, 2017, 03:07:44 PM
They can actually do that sort of thing these days though. Subtle difference in reflected light allows them to construct an image from a different vantage point to what the camera was originally in.

It only works in lab conditions and is quite ropey though.

Indeed, image enhancement exists today, not as streamlined as it is portrayed on the silver screen. The bigger issue is that none of these individuals, especially hackers use a mouse, they have some how memorized every shortcut/quick key for every function possible ever, including zoom in x1,0000.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Bazooka on October 06, 2017, 03:14:13 PM
Indeed, image enhancement exists today, not as streamlined as it is portrayed on the silver screen. The bigger issue is that none of these individuals, especially hackers use a mouse, they have some how memorized every shortcut/quick key for every function possible ever, including zoom in x1,0000.

I think a lot of people who use photoshop and edit video do use the shortcuts more than the mouse.

Similarly a lot of developers swear by the command-line text editor vim as once you learn the key commands it's quicker than taking your hands off the keyboard.

Blumf

magick cctv_in.jpg -resize "20000%" cctv_out.jpg


mothman

Quote from: dr beat on October 06, 2017, 11:14:46 AM
One that the Fast Show nicely skewered was the one where a young inexperienced performer has to suddenly fill in at the last minute and steals the show.  Although admittedly I can't actually recall any films in which that happens.

Singing in the Rain? Or has that been mentioned already?

zomgmouse

Red Dwarf had a good "zoom and enhance" parody in one of the newer seasons, apologies if it's already been linked.

Blumf

Quote from: zomgmouse on October 06, 2017, 10:51:06 PM
Red Dwarf had a good "zoom and enhance" parody in one of the newer seasons, apologies if it's already been linked.

Wasn't that the episode that was one big Blade Runner homage?

zomgmouse

Quote from: Blumf on October 07, 2017, 01:03:11 AM
Wasn't that the episode that was one big Blade Runner homage?

Yeah, pretty much. Or rather I think the start and end were that, or at least the premise of it. The whole show was said to be inspired by that film in general.

newbridge

I'm amazed that they are still making Magical Negro movies in 2017:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PltWQ8kQe04

Icehaven

Not a cliche so much as a personal bugbear but it really niggles me in films when people don't close doors behind them. It's not even always to emphasise that they're in a hurry, sometimes they'll just be getting out of a car and going into a building, or carrying shopping into their house, and the scene will continue and I'll just keep thinking "but your front door is still open!"
See also not paying taxi drivers.

Bazooka

Quote from: icehaven on October 08, 2017, 07:54:20 AM
Not a cliche so much as a personal bugbear but it really niggles me in films when people don't close doors behind them. It's not even always to emphasise that they're in a hurry, sometimes they'll just be getting out of a car and going into a building, or carrying shopping into their house, and the scene will continue and I'll just keep thinking "but your front door is still open!"
See also not paying taxi drivers.

The taxi driver doesn't get thanked or even get a goodbye.

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

Quote from: icehaven on October 08, 2017, 07:54:20 AM
Not a cliche so much as a personal bugbear but it really niggles me in films when people don't close doors behind them. It's not even always to emphasise that they're in a hurry, sometimes they'll just be getting out of a car and going into a building, or carrying shopping into their house, and the scene will continue and I'll just keep thinking "but your front door is still open!"
See also not paying taxi drivers.

There's a scene in a James Bond film, it might be " Dr. No "  where he's in  a hotel and getting all settled in his
room and that, and starts running a bath. Then he gets distracted, and finds himself in the adjacent room with a James Bond dolly bird, and ends up spending the night with her, you know what he's like. But he's left his bath running! Do we see the subsequent scene where a furious hotel manager is demanding Bond pays up for flooding his room? Do we bollocks! Ruins the whole film.

lipsink

In modern films when characters say "Oh! My bad."

They seem to have at least cut down on the whole 'characters texting/taking selfies at inappropriate moments LOL!' cliche.

Phil_A

A detective on the case of a serial killer will, at some point, exclaim in exasperation "HE'S LAUGHING AT US!"

Seen in The Bone Collector,
https://youtu.be/wdyHrAbMVmE?t=110

Slight variation seen in the trailer for The Snowman.
https://youtu.be/BF2Ksrxu_QY?t=91

Brundle-Fly

Quote from: icehaven on October 08, 2017, 07:54:20 AM
Not a cliche so much as a personal bugbear but it really niggles me in films when people don't close doors behind them. It's not even always to emphasise that they're in a hurry, sometimes they'll just be getting out of a car and going into a building, or carrying shopping into their house, and the scene will continue and I'll just keep thinking "but your front door is still open!"
See also not paying taxi drivers.

...and not saying goodbye at the end of a phone call.

greencalx

Most of mine have been mentioned, though I will amplify the ringing of a bell at the end of every scene in a school-based drama - those bells must ring about 300 times a day.

Ultimately a lot of this is dramatic license but some things are unforgivable, like having actors badly mime the playing of a musical instrument. They can go to enormous lengths to make injuries, stunts, etc all look believable on-screen but any old fool can tell that the note isn't changing when that bow changes direction and vice versa. Just use a fucking stunt double goddammit.

mrpupkin

A nervous singer gets off to a shaky start and some twatty audience members are rolling their eyes and laughing but then the song goes "good" and the twats see the error of their ways and then they're all fucking loving it.

Actually I don't want this cliché to fuck off its hilarious.

greenman

Quote from: mrpupkin on October 09, 2017, 04:06:31 PM
A nervous singer gets off to a shaky start and some twatty audience members are rolling their eyes and laughing but then the song goes "good" and the twats see the error of their ways and then they're all fucking loving it.

Actually I don't want this cliché to fuck off its hilarious.

Natalie "fall on my arse yet get acclaimed as the best ballerina ever" Portman is a variation on this.

Gulftastic

Quote from: mrpupkin on October 09, 2017, 04:06:31 PM
A nervous singer gets off to a shaky start and some twatty audience members are rolling their eyes and laughing but then the song goes "good" and the twats see the error of their ways and then they're all fucking loving it.

Actually I don't want this cliché to fuck off its hilarious.

Here's a version of that

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OuC57M5v27E

Sorry about the poor quality.

Bazooka

Quote from: mrpupkin on October 09, 2017, 04:06:31 PM
A nervous singer gets off to a shaky start and some twatty audience members are rolling their eyes and laughing but then the song goes "good" and the twats see the error of their ways and then they're all fucking loving it.

Actually I don't want this cliché to fuck off its hilarious.

Pretty much the x-factor/got talent thing. The cruel panel and audience look on as a perhaps a larger chap walks into the stage, only to singer opera really well.

QDRPHNC

Quote from: Konki on October 05, 2017, 08:10:28 AM
Another camera-based one, and I'm not even sure it'd be classed as a cliche, but it always pisses me off, is when some action happens then later on in the film someone is watching it back on cctv except the cctv footage is exactly the same as what we saw earlier; same camera angles, same panning and zooming. Just shoot if from ONE OTHER ANGLE, you lazy fucks. Occasionally they'll put a filter on it to make it look a bit fuzzy but that is frankly insulting my intelligence.

The worst one ever for this kind of thing is The Running Man. At the start there's a scene with Arnie having a fight in a chopper, including a POV angle of him getting smashed in the face with a gun. At the end, we see "security footage" of the event, which is exactly the same as the beginning including the POV shot.

Even my 10 year old brain knew this was balls.

lipsink

Quote from: mrpupkin on October 09, 2017, 04:06:31 PM
A nervous singer gets off to a shaky start and some twatty audience members are rolling their eyes and laughing but then the song goes "good" and the twats see the error of their ways and then they're all fucking loving it.

Actually I don't want this cliché to fuck off its hilarious.

This happens in T2 doesn't it?

AsparagusTrevor

Quote from: lipsink on October 11, 2017, 03:04:58 PM
This happens in T2 doesn't it?

Yeah, if I remember right the T1000 does a dance routine to Canned Heat by Jamiroquai, Arnold, Sarah & John Connor look unimpressed, but the rest of the crowd burst into huge applause.