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Film cliches you want to fuck off

Started by popcorn, September 25, 2017, 01:48:30 PM

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Brundle-Fly

The mawkish standing ovation in the final five minutes of a film (usually for a misunderstood maverick that is finally vindicated).  For added corn, the nemesis of the piece has to begrudgingly acquiesce and slowly join the applause with a weak resigned smile. This trope even occurred in the final episode of LOG s3

eg: Disclosure (1994)


Brundle-Fly

I still think this is one best videos Cracked.com ever produced

Trailer For Every Oscar-Winning Movie Ever
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbhrz1-4hN4

up_the_hampipe

Quote from: popcorn on September 25, 2017, 04:20:35 PM
When a woman has a wank, it's empowering, liberating, and rebellious.

When a bloke has a wank, he's pathetic.

I want wanking equality.

Do you want both to look pathetic or empowering? I'm not sure I'd like to see a man proudly beating his meat.

Alberon

Quote from: Replies From View on September 25, 2017, 07:32:24 PM
Characters shaking their head and muttering "Gordon Bennett!"


I mean who can even remember who Gordon Bennett was in 2017?  Yet they still stir him up!

I must admit I still use the phrase.

Does that mean I'm in a film?

If I am it seems to be one of those tedious arthouse ones where nothing happens over a very long period of time. I mean I haven't been in a gun battle for months and I can't remember the last time something exploded in a big ball of flame around me.

spock rogers

The hero is down. The bad guy points their weapon at the hero, says a line. A shot rings out. You think the hero has been shot... but no! The hero's friend, (who we thought was gone), has returned and taken out the bad guy at the very last second.

Every time I see that one now, (quite a lot), I literally tell the TV show/film to fuck off.

Shit Good Nose

Quote from: Alberon on September 25, 2017, 09:21:56 PM
I can't remember the last time something exploded in a big ball of flame around me.

With you walking through it in slow motion.  Wearing sunglasses.

I like the slow-motion dive towards the camera with an expanding fireball explosion behind.

Phil_A

Quote from: spock rogers on September 25, 2017, 09:23:32 PM
The hero is down. The bad guy points their weapon at the hero, says a line. A shot rings out. You think the hero has been shot... but no! The hero's friend, (who we thought was gone), has returned and taken out the bad guy at the very last second.

Every time I see that one now, (quite a lot), I literally tell the TV show/film to fuck off.

See also: the hero has the bad guy cornered and the bad guy is about to reveal crucial piece of information BUT THEN! a shot rings out, bad guy is dead! Now we'll never know what he knew, how extremely frustrating!

Avril Lavigne

Quote from: popcorn on September 25, 2017, 04:20:35 PM
When a woman has a wank, it's empowering, liberating, and rebellious.

When a bloke has a wank, he's pathetic.

I want wanking equality.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBsFQIs_W58
(Click this link if you are currently at work)

zomgmouse

[tag] tvtropes: the thread [/tag]

Quote from: Replies From View on September 25, 2017, 07:32:24 PM
Characters shaking their head and muttering "Gordon Bennett!"


I mean who can even remember who Gordon Bennett was in 2017?  Yet they still stir him up!

Memetic language. Phrases get stuck in usage and eventually origins are forgotten but the phrases are still active.

Repeater


olliebean

Quote from: Bazooka on September 25, 2017, 06:29:46 PM
This and I have some important information to tell you but we have to meet in person whilst I leave you hanging, you have just seen an Alien, it's not a blood test at the doctor's.

"I'll explain later" falls into this general category, too. Any time a character withholds vital information when they have no reason to do so other than that the writer doesn't want the audience to know it yet.

Another one: any time a character walks backwards into the road whilst talking to someone, I don't even need to say it - you all know what's almost certainly going to happen next.

Serge

Quote from: olliebean on September 26, 2017, 10:31:20 AM"I'll explain later" falls into this general category, too. Any time a character withholds vital information when they have no reason to do so other than that the writer doesn't want the audience to know it yet.

Yeah, this one really fucks me off. A particularly bad example was in 'Jurassic World' - I know, what are the chances, etc - when the Raptor expert is shown the new genetically modified dinosaur and told which other dinosaurs it's made up from, with one exception, which only comes out later in the movie so he can say, "Strewth! It's part-Raptor!" I mean, why wouldn't you tell the Raptor expert that the dinosaur is part-Raptor? It's already too late for him to say, "Well, I think that would be a terrible idea."

Fambo Number Mive

A lot of modern film action fights seem to follow the Matrix style of one person beating up several people because he or she can move much faster than they can. It's very boring.

Bad guys going on and on about the success of their plan, just before the good guy they have captured beats them up.

Cuntbeaks

#45
Baddies being despatched with a single blow or gunshot. No screaming, wailing, pools of blood, recovery or any indication that they were ever alive to begin with. Usually in groups of 15 at a time.

Going deeper into the haunted house, asking if there's anyone there.

Not taking the opportunity to kill off a nemesis, instead talking shit for half an hour before an escape is made, bullet ricochets/misses from 2 yards.

A smaller, weaker foe annihilating a group of 30 armed rough necks by using skill. The baddies wait patiently to be knocked the fuckout, one at a time, with a single blow.

Mister Six

"Old friend."

Said in a sinister way by the villain to the hero, or in a sad way by a hero to either a dying pal or to the villain they know they must stop.

Is there a lazier and more hackneyed way of showing a long-time connection between two people? And has anyone ever actually said this? Extra awful when used after it's long been established that the pair are long-time chums.

asids

The good guy(s) defeat what appears to be the main villain or target they have to take out, but wait! Suddenly, a figure appears, laughing heartily and clapping his hands sarcastically. "Well done for doing the work for me/falling right into my trap/getting rid of him, he was becoming a problem. But the real evil is ME! Now I will kill you!"

Something along those lines anyway.

popcorn

I would like science fiction stories to get on with the business of blowing my mind with the scale and mystery of the cosmos without the need to "humanise" things with trivial sentimental plots about mothers and fathers and sons and daughters, because that's what really matters. I know those things matter, I'm not here to learn that.

Sexton Brackets Drugbust

I'm aghast the new Bladerunner trailer contains the line:

"You do not know what pain is yet. You will learn."

When it now sounds more like something South Park would have done in one of their many 'generic movie dialogue' parodies.

olliebean

A couple that are specific to comedies (and faces):

- The only reason anyone in a comedy ever changes a baby's nappy is so that the baby can hilariously pee on their face.

- The only reason anyone in a comedy ever scatters a dead relative's ashes is so that the wind can hilariously blow the ashes back into their face.

saltysnacks

'Me and you are not so different'

Usually said by a murderous sociopath to a slightly angry person.

non capisco

A main protagonist at the end of a film throwing an object that represents their life from the beginning of the film into a sea or river. Usually a cop with their badge but can be anything. I am disgusted with my past self but I have learnt a valuable lesson so I will hoy this into the sea and that will psychologically be that.

A law enforcement agency arriving at a gang member's house to arrest them/search the property on a day they are holding a children's birthday party. The gang fella will invariably say something along the lines of "On my kid's fuckin' birthday, you cocksucker?!!" and his wife will also be going garrity screaming "You're upsetting the kid! Look, she's fuckin' cryin'! SHAME ON YOU! SHAAAAAAME ON YOU!"

HORROR FILM:- An old record player playing a 1920s/30 song and then a ghost kid scuttling in the background going "HEE HEE HEE HEE!"

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: non capisco on September 26, 2017, 11:37:11 PM
A main protagonist at the end of a film throwing an object that represents their life from the beginning of the film into a sea or river. Usually a cop with their badge but can be anything. I am disgusted with my past self but I have learnt a valuable lesson so I will hoy this into the sea and that will psychologically be that.


Cops all meeting up for a weekend family BBQ, the new guy gets to know them etc and is usually undercover or later on a grass. The rules of the street etc are usually laid out to said noob at this time too.









zomgmouse

Quote from: Cuntbeaks on September 26, 2017, 05:49:56 PM
Baddies being despatched with a single blow or gunshot. No screaming, wailing, pools of blood, recovery or any indication that they were ever alive to begin with. Usually in groups of 15 at a time.

Also the opposite of this when a precision sharpshooter or trained assassin or lethal fighter or hard machine warrior who's been an infallible destroyer the entire film suddenly forgets how to shoot straight at the film's climax as a cheap attempt at tension.

up_the_hampipe

Quote from: olliebean on September 26, 2017, 08:10:07 PM
The only reason anyone in a comedy ever scatters a dead relative's ashes is so that the wind can hilariously blow the ashes back into their face.

They just did this on Episodes the other day.

colacentral

When there are characters and they talk to each other. This must happen in almost every film!

When there's your main character who's good, and he just happens to be trying to stop a baddie. How many times have we seen this?

When there's two single characters, almost always one male and one female, and they're going out on dates, flirting etc. And they always end up together at the end. We've seen this a million times!

Blumf


Kids in America always have big fucking huge bedrooms with loads
of cool stuff. Even when they are portrayed to be in poor families.