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Film cliches you want to fuck off

Started by popcorn, September 25, 2017, 01:48:30 PM

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Ornlu

Quote from: lipsink on January 25, 2019, 12:47:07 PM
I never understand why in films sometimes people are gagged with a pair of socks shoved in their mouth. Can't they just spit the socks out?

Christ, I can't even imagine. My gag reflex would deploy instantly. If someone bound my arms and suddenly shoved some rolled-up socks in my mouth I'd probably just retch til I threw up.

Bazooka

Agreed, I've been close to vomiting just brushing my teeth.

kalowski

Quote from: magval on January 26, 2019, 08:24:18 AM
One I've really come to hate is a sociopathic bad guy, sometimes even good guy, saying something threatening or asking someone to do something horrible or even impossible, then glaring at them for a second and bursting out laughing and adding "relax, I'm just fucking with you."

Often with that exact phrase.

This can be done well ("what the fuck is so funny about me?" for example), but I'm just sick of it. One of the lazily employed building blocks for modern films, like so many of these are.

None of these clichés would be so had if writers tried to just change them a little, but often they appear beat for beat in film after film.

Good spot. And you are correct to point out that the Goodfellas scene is a shining example of how it should be done.

Icehaven

Someone turning up to a old people's home or psych ward pretending to be a relative of a resident (who's conveniently in enough of a state for it to be believable that they don't 'remember' them) because they want to talk to them about something, and they get let straight in. 

greencalx

In crime dramas, where informal enquiries are made of a potential witness / suspect, getting suddenly huffy and saying "Is that all inspector?"  I suspect in real life if you tried to get a plod to fuck off like that you'd be down the nick before you can say George Gentley.

(In fact, in real life in my experience, the conversation goes like this: "Did you happen to see someone trying to break into your neighbours shed at three o'clock this morning?" "No, sorry, I was asleep" "oh, ok, sorry for bothering you")

magval

That neck cracking thing that hard cunts do.

mothman


magval

Oh aye, to themselves. Don't mind it when necks are snapped by hand but not so keen on the hardman visual shorthand of cracking their necks instead of their knuckles.

touchingcloth

Extra! Extra! Read all about it! *handy shot of a front page detailing the antagonist's fall from grace or protagonist's success*

Quote from: touchingcloth on January 27, 2019, 10:39:59 PM
Extra! Extra! Read all about it! *handy shot of a front page detailing the antagonist's fall from grace or protagonist's success*

Or could be a montage of still photos.

Phil_A

An eccentric outsider scientist is bought on board to an stalling government project that their best guys gave been working on for months, solves their problem in thirty seconds.

lipsink

Person watches news story. Gets phone call. "Are you watching this?"

St_Eddie

Quote from: lipsink on January 28, 2019, 12:26:20 PM
Person watches news story. Gets phone call. "Are you watching this?"

Either that or a person gets a phone call.  "Turn on the TV!".  Person turns on the TV and the relevant news programme comes straight on, without the person having to change the channel.

Ballad of Ballard Berkley

Quote from: St_Eddie on January 28, 2019, 04:16:52 PM
Either that or a person gets a phone call.  "Turn on the TV!".  Person turns on the TV and the relevant news programme comes straight on, without the person having to change the channel.

This must've been subverted in a comedy at some point? I can't think of any examples, but it's such an obvious gag: person receiving urgent phone call switches TV on and the first thing they see is Homes Under the Hammer. Further hilarity ensues when they comment on what they're watching as if it really is incredibly shocking and important.

I am Graham Linehan.

lipsink

Quote from: St_Eddie on January 28, 2019, 04:16:52 PM
Either that or a person gets a phone call.  "Turn on the TV!".  Person turns on the TV and the relevant news programme comes straight on, without the person having to change the channel.

If it's in a bar, the person will be about to take a swig of a drink and stops suddenly when they hear the news report in the background.

samadriel

Quote from: Ballad of Ballard Berkley on January 28, 2019, 04:23:40 PM
This must've been subverted in a comedy at some point? I can't think of any examples, but it's such an obvious gag: person receiving urgent phone call switches TV on and the first thing they see is Homes Under the Hammer. Further hilarity ensues when they comment on what they're watching as if it really is incredibly shocking and important.

Arrested Development did it.

"Imagine the impact if that had come on right when we turned on the TV!"

magval

Person not used to smoking joints coughs like fuck after having a go.

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: St_Eddie on January 28, 2019, 04:16:52 PM
Either that or a person gets a phone call.  "Turn on the TV!".  Person turns on the TV and the relevant news programme comes straight on, without the person having to change the channel.

Then they'll watch for about 30 seconds while they get the pertinent information then they turn the TV off because during an ongoing serious news story there couldn't possibly be anything to be gained by just leaving the TV on.

Berthas Fat Leg

People being boring or whingeing about their first world problems - whilst in a spaceship.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Berthas Fat Leg on January 29, 2019, 08:03:43 PM
People being boring or whingeing about their first world problems - whilst in a spaceship.

People being boring or whingeing about their first world problems - whilst living in the 21st century, with the Internet, videogames and loads of other amazing technology.  When you're living in the present, it's easy to take things for granted, even if that present is within our future.

Brundle-Fly

Returning to the gaffer tape/ sock in/ covering the mouth thing. The heroic person immediately covering up the mouth of the person they have just rescued with a shush finger indicating they should both be silent.
See also the villain getting annoyed with anybody who is crying or talking too much. "If you say just one more thing!, I'll" etc etc

zomgmouse

Exaggerated microphone sounds/feedback when someone nervous is about to perform.


lipsink

People who say the words out loud while they're typing them on to a computer.

In music films, the record company guy who appears after a gig to tell the up-and-coming star that they've "really got something. Here's my card, we should do something." are usually English.

If a character is depressed and down on their luck they'll have stubble. Flashbacks to when they were doing great and they'll be clean shaven.

kalowski

Quote from: lipsink on February 01, 2019, 10:44:33 AM
People who say the words out loud while they're typing them on to a computer.
And the unrealistic screens when people are hacking. Rather than just a list of code, it's like a 1980s ZX81 game with skull and crossbones images for forbidden links etc.

beanheadmcginty

Husband and wife get into bed. They have so many pillows that they are practically sitting bolt upright, yet this is perfectly normal to them and they are able to go to sleep.

Quote from: lipsink on February 01, 2019, 10:44:33 AM
People who say the words out loud while they're typing them on to a computer.

Well, I sometimes do that.  It's realistic to sometimes show people who are as weird as me.

Quote from: lipsink on February 01, 2019, 10:44:33 AM
If a character is depressed and down on their luck they'll have stubble. Flashbacks to when they were doing great and they'll be clean shaven.

Just brought to mind the old cartoon cliche of someone whose been burning the midnight oil.  They're often shown with stubble, as well as rings under their bloodshot eyes-often propped up with matchsticks-and chain-smoking, while cupping their chin in a hand whose arm's elbow leans on a table or their knee.

Icehaven

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough."

mothman

Quote from: beanheadmcginty on February 01, 2019, 08:43:28 PM
Husband and wife get into bed. They have so many pillows that they are practically sitting bolt upright, yet this is perfectly normal to them and they are able to go to sleep.

Americans always have loads of extraneous cushions arranged artistically on their perfectly made beds, which gave to be removed to get into said bed.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: beanheadmcginty on February 01, 2019, 08:43:28 PM
Husband and wife get into bed. They have so many pillows that they are practically sitting bolt upright, yet this is perfectly normal to them and they are able to go to sleep.

L shaped duvet that manages to cover the woman up to her shoulders but the man up to his belly button.