Humpty Gorgon.

[Glebe]

Humpty Gorgon's favourite ice lolly is the Twister.

[zomgmouse]

Humpty Gorgon sat on a wall,
Humpty Gorgon had a great fall.
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again
Because he was a mythical beast
Who eviscerated the living shit out of man and horse alike;
Just ripped them to fucking shreds.

[Glebe]

Humpty is fascinated with mythological beasts, possibly because his surname is Gorgon. Or it might actually be Gordon, but he changed it because he is fascinated with mythological beasts.

And his first name might really be Humphrey...