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More terrible book covers

Started by Captain Crunch, October 09, 2017, 06:52:56 PM

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Chriddof

At first glance I honestly thought that was a book about Roswell.

MoonDust

Oh wow that is awful.

It looks like a VHS cover of a low budget UFO documentary from the 90s. That's immediately what I thought.

Edit: I had similar thoughts to Chriddof.

Glebe

Quote from: marquis_de_sad on November 23, 2018, 08:26:42 PMFrom the band bios thread

Behold:


That's going to sit in a comfy chair and the words 'Armchair Thriller' will come up... on the, er, screen.

Maurice Yeatman



"We love your book, vicar, but we've had second thoughts about the cover if you don't mind. We need to attract younger buyers."






Maurice Yeatman

Here's Savile's foreword to the above, a kick in the teeth to anyone who believes he was a monster who didn't have hidden depths.


JifMoose

I've been getting a lot of books from the archive.org openlibrary. It's great, but for some reason I've fallen into a hole of computing books from the 90s - and my word are there some dodgy covers:



Want to iron your shirt for the portrait on the cover of your biography, Tim? Nah, I'm fine...



What will sell a book on the inventor of the first web browser? Piety!

MattD

Quote from: Rich Uncle Skeleton on November 08, 2018, 12:23:53 AM


Probably repeating someone word for word from the previous thread which I haven't read, but this one looks like it's setting out to test "don't judge a book by its cover" to the absolute limits. Who on earth could have possibly thought that was a good idea for both the standard and extended versions?

Still amazed at what is probably the best music book I've ever read that this cover passed quality control! It only took the best part of a decade for Lewisohn to write it, you'd have thought they'd have time to come up with something decent.

marquis_de_sad

Quote from: Rich Uncle Skeleton on November 08, 2018, 12:23:53 AM


Probably repeating someone word for word from the previous thread which I haven't read, but this one looks like it's setting out to test "don't judge a book by its cover" to the absolute limits. Who on earth could have possibly thought that was a good idea for both the standard and extended versions?

Quote from: MattD on March 08, 2019, 11:19:07 PM
Still amazed at what is probably the best music book I've ever read that this cover passed quality control! It only took the best part of a decade for Lewisohn to write it, you'd have thought they'd have time to come up with something decent.

It looks like it's just come up to the screen with a whooshing sound, where it's going to hang for a few seconds, pulsating, before it whooshes off again to make way for the new Atomic Kitten video on cd:uk.


gilbertharding



Apologies if this has been posted before. Let's face it, it's unlikely anyone from here would have seen this and not posted it...


Mister Six

James Bond's famous surrealist period.

Hey, Punk!

I'll have a dry martini, both shaken nor stirred.

marquis_de_sad

Ceci n'est pas une Aston Martin DB5

flotemysost

Bond's undiscovered prog album.

Not terrible, but the cover for Nicholas Hytner's memoir about the National Theatre struck me as a bit retro and 'budget'-looking for an edition that came out a couple of years ago:



The paperback's much nicer:


Hey, Punk!

Quote from: flotemysost on April 06, 2019, 01:09:54 PM
The paperback's much nicer:



The word riveting never sounds sincere to me.

Deyv

It's Alan Bennett, of course it's not sincere. He's taking the pith out of reality.

Famous Mortimer

Quote from: JifMoose on March 08, 2019, 10:13:56 PM



What will sell a book on the inventor of the first web browser? Piety!

Adam McKay hadn't let himself go yet.


gilbertharding

Quote from: gilbertharding on April 03, 2019, 04:26:27 PM


Apologies if this has been posted before. Let's face it, it's unlikely anyone from here would have seen this and not posted it...

Just noticed the Golden Eyeball floating in the sky.

Icehaven

Was it a legal requirement to put tits on book covers in the 70s (as well as have them writing forewords)?

Spoon of Ploff

Saw this in m'local Waterstones 'other day:



Less an existential threat to a blinded humanity by mobile flesh eating plants, and more one man's upset at the state of his cannabis crop.

gilbertharding

It's a while since I read The Day of the Triffids - but from what I remember that cover is a fairly accurate representation of exactly how sad about it all blinded humanity was.

marquis_de_sad

Quote from: gilbertharding on April 11, 2019, 02:31:33 PM
It's a while since I read The Day of the Triffids - but from what I remember that cover is a fairly accurate representation of exactly how sad about it all blinded humanity was.

I think you must've read the La Redoute edition.

gilbertharding

A google image search for 'John Wyndham Books' and I'm wondering if he's ever been published with a cover which wasn't terrible.

Even the first edition Penguin paperback looks like The Revenge of Fotherington-Tomas.





Johnny Yesno

Quote from: Raskolnikov on June 30, 2019, 11:11:45 PM
This is, apparently, real



Blimey, those illustrated platinum editions are really something. And there's loads of them. A sample:





buttgammon

Truly awful; they're even worse than the horrendous Wordsworth Classics editions.







The last one is the best, as it looks like the designer literally only read the first paragraph. Despite the disgusting cover, it's actually fairly popular among Wake scholars, because it's one of the few editions that has line numbers.

Raskolnikov

This is my favourite Wordsworth Classics cover, an alternative version where the painting transforms into a hipster.


Maurice Yeatman

Quote from: buttgammon on July 01, 2019, 09:38:17 AM
Truly awful; they're even worse than the horrendous Wordsworth Classics editions.



I can't believe the publisher left the apostrophe out of the title. Inexcusable. 
First person to post that there isn't supposed to be an apostrophe is an absolute stinker with no friends!!! Hang on, they'll see this bit if they quote me.