Author Topic: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th  (Read 4742 times)

madhair60

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Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« on: November 03, 2017, 08:23:54 PM »
Have a serious word with yourself. Being an adult who likes fireworks, full stop. Jesus.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #1 on: November 03, 2017, 08:25:58 PM »
It's not usually adults mate.

itsfredtitmus

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #2 on: November 03, 2017, 08:26:12 PM »
might go light some now

Spoon of Ploff

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #3 on: November 03, 2017, 08:28:28 PM »
pets tho

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #4 on: November 03, 2017, 08:30:09 PM »
Fireworks can just fuck off, sick of the constant irritating noise in the background and it seems to go on for weeks as people just do it when it's convenient for them rather than on the day. Get fucked mate.

itsfredtitmus

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #5 on: November 03, 2017, 08:30:24 PM »
just lit one

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #6 on: November 03, 2017, 08:30:55 PM »
Definitely a get in grave for me. I once spent 2 weeks in Broadstairs leading up to Nov 5th while I was contracting and it basically sounded like a firing range all evening as people (I assume kids) relentlessly let off bangers and rockets both before and after the main date. I suppose there isn't much going on around those parts at that time of year.

biggytitbo

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #7 on: November 03, 2017, 08:31:14 PM »
It used to be a lot easier to buy fireworks so they'd go off constantly for a fortnight each side of Nov 5. Now it's a few fizzles and only the odd tramp burnt alive.

Alberon

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #8 on: November 03, 2017, 08:33:47 PM »
Have a serious word with yourself. Being an adult who likes fireworks, full stop. Jesus.

What about Scientologists who want to set off fireworks for their Diwali festival? Surely that’s okay, isn’t it?


Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #10 on: November 03, 2017, 09:07:47 PM »
Muslims have as much right at Eid, as you do on bonfire night, to stick a banger up a cat's arse

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #11 on: November 03, 2017, 09:15:47 PM »
Mother was friends with a little bald man who lived in a council estate. She'd do tasteful charcoal drawings of us and he'd sell them with his business talent, a great arrangement, but we had to go to his house a lot. He liked fireworks and he set them off. Took ages, we had to stand in the garden for 20 minutes whilst he planted them in the flowerbeds and tried to get them to go off. Not an instant thing. First time I had mac and cheese, at his house, seemed like the kind of thing he'd eat, unimpressive. Some great food milestones on that council estate, mother had a prostitute friend, a tiny ugly prostitute and she made us turkey twizzlers and they were burnt and her children ate them straight off the baking tray, only time I ever had turkey twizzlers.

Traditional families too, always the men who do firework work, no firework women, unheard of. Don't know any fireworkers now, I have better taste in friends than mother, not drug-addled, and I'd think less of anyone who did it.  No real firework development, they're the same as they've always been, tiresome, and if there was genuine innovation like in the soft-play wholesale world then I'd have maintained an interest. Same old bang. 

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #12 on: November 03, 2017, 09:24:04 PM »
S4C

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #13 on: November 03, 2017, 09:24:10 PM »
Have a serious word with yourself. Being an adult who likes fireworks, full stop. Jesus.

Diwali and that mate got a problem

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #14 on: November 03, 2017, 09:30:09 PM »
Doing my fucking head in with the fireworks already.  POPPETY POP!!  CHECK US OUT!!  WE HOPE THAT ALL YOU RANDOM OVERHEARERS LOVE US BECAUSE OF THE FIREWORKS WE ARE GIVING YOU!!

I'm considering inventing a device that makes fireworks only audible to the people who have paid for them.

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #15 on: November 03, 2017, 09:33:36 PM »
Love how 350 boring days a year but yeah hate the days something different from the grinding shit happens

Fairwork displays, good

Being on sale to the general public, bad

Of mate

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #16 on: November 03, 2017, 09:34:21 PM »
I like to think every time you see a neighbour's firework "oh that's like £15"

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #17 on: November 03, 2017, 09:44:43 PM »
I like to think every time you see a neighbour's firework "oh that's like £15"

Or "I do hope that speared one of their eyes."

Paul Calf

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #18 on: November 03, 2017, 09:46:50 PM »
Colours and shapes, eh? What's the point in them? They're all made up of lines and white reflects all the colours. What's the point in colours and shapes? Fucking infantile cunts demanding CMYK-gamut varieties of polygons. People should be banned from perceiving colours, shapes and sounds because I don't like them. I hope these idiot Tory shape-and-visible-spectrum-perceivers die of arse cancer.

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #19 on: November 03, 2017, 09:54:52 PM »
Colours and shapes, eh? What's the point in them? They're all made up of lines and white reflects all the colours. What's the point in colours and shapes? Fucking infantile cunts demanding CMYK-gamut varieties of polygons. People should be banned from perceiving colours, shapes and sounds because I don't like them. I hope these idiot Tory shape-and-visible-spectrum-perceivers die of arse cancer.

* Paul Calf picks up the green pen

"Dear Stewart Lee..."

Have you ever even heard other people's fireworks while you're trying to do anything else?  It's not a complaint against colours and shapes in the slightest.

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #20 on: November 03, 2017, 09:58:29 PM »
 shit fawkes cunts

Paul Calf

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #21 on: November 03, 2017, 10:04:58 PM »
Have you ever even heard other people's fireworks while you're trying to do anything else?  It's not a complaint against colours and shapes in the slightest.

Sorry. I was trying to parody the hyperbolic rage against November's festival of the dying light.

itsfredtitmus

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #22 on: November 03, 2017, 10:15:02 PM »
Mother was friends with a little bald man who lived in a council estate. She'd do tasteful charcoal drawings of us and he'd sell them with his business talent, a great arrangement, but we had to go to his house a lot. He liked fireworks and he set them off. Took ages, we had to stand in the garden for 20 minutes whilst he planted them in the flowerbeds and tried to get them to go off. Not an instant thing. First time I had mac and cheese, at his house, seemed like the kind of thing he'd eat, unimpressive. Some great food milestones on that council estate, mother had a prostitute friend, a tiny ugly prostitute and she made us turkey twizzlers and they were burnt and her children ate them straight off the baking tray, only time I ever had turkey twizzlers.

Traditional families too, always the men who do firework work, no firework women, unheard of. Don't know any fireworkers now, I have better taste in friends than mother, not drug-addled, and I'd think less of anyone who did it.  No real firework development, they're the same as they've always been, tiresome, and if there was genuine innovation like in the soft-play wholesale world then I'd have maintained an interest. Same old bang.
that was me

itsfredtitmus

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #23 on: November 03, 2017, 10:15:33 PM »
Fireworks? Fire? Works? I bloody well hope it does paid a tenner of these, dickhead

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #24 on: November 03, 2017, 10:21:05 PM »
Massive fireworks displays put on by the council on fireworks night, or by pyrotechnics specialists at weddings or Diwali or every night at Eurodisney? Aye.

Little Jimmy Cartwrights turning the place into Baghdad with cheapo Morrisons bottle rockets for a fortnight? Grave.

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #25 on: November 03, 2017, 10:21:53 PM »
Imagine wanting - needing - to set off explosions in your garden and thinking that anybody that isn't thrilled about this is the 'bad guy'.

itsfredtitmus

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #26 on: November 03, 2017, 10:26:39 PM »
Imagine wanting - needing - to set off explosions in your garden and thinking that anybody that isn't thrilled about this is the 'bad guy'.
Bit rich coming from you with that avatar
pwnd

biggytitbo

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #27 on: November 03, 2017, 10:30:28 PM »
I regard fireworks with the kind of tired, oversated disdain a debauched roman emperor regards life, having seen every possible form of depravity known to man -  "I've seen fireworks, take them away".

BlodwynPig

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Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #28 on: November 03, 2017, 10:32:42 PM »
No fireworks day here. I did see a bus saying "Lest We Forget" though, but no poppy either.

Re: Setting off fireworks any day other than Nov 5th
« Reply #29 on: November 03, 2017, 10:34:35 PM »
I for one, quite frankly, love the personal freedom my country affords me to stick explosive devices up cats' bums in order to celebrate our hatred of wretched European Catholicism.

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