Jurassic World 2: Sponsored by Budweiser

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I've seen a Brachiosaur disappearing into smoke in real life and it was rubbish.  One of my worst real-life experiences and I'm gobsmacked that they even bothered putting it in this.

Somebody please make this movie no longer exist.

[Harpo Speaks]

What if it disappeared into a sick Vape cloud instead - any good?

[Bad Ambassador]

I like how the auction room was designed in such a way so that the auctioneer couldn't see half the bidders.

"Here's something we're working on, but you can't bid on it."
"Twenty million dollars!"
"Oh, alright then."

Stupidest film I've seen in years.

[up_the_hampipe]

I hope Blue eats Chris Pratt in the next one. She's noo yer pal.

[purlieu]

it feels like the schlocky B-movie which has always been part of the series DNA, but which it has usually seemed a bit ashamed of. They probably are still ashamed of it, but they didn't do a very good job of hiding it here.

I dunno, the final act of The Lost World is proper schlocky B-movie (which is why I hated it at the time and really enjoy it now).
Interesting reading the comments about this. I'll no doubt end up downloading it when it comes out on digital versatile disc.

[shiftwork2]

I didn't know the first thing about this having only seen Jurassic Park once at the cinema in 1992 or something, so I asked for "Jurassic...I don't know, Jurassic twats" and before I'd even reflected on the hideousness of what I'd said out loud I had my tickets and it was ok.

[Steve Lampkins]

I remember quite liking Jurrasic World in the cinema. Though EVERYONE ELSE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD hates it, so maybe I was drunk that day. Or watching a different film

Vaguely remembered not enjoying the first JW. Watched it last night in preparation for watching the new one today. JW1 was even worse than I remembered.

Then watching the sequel today was only saved by being able to exchange disbelieving looks with my friend as we laughed away during the shockingly bad film that unfolded before our eyes. Nothing could justify this shite.

[mothman]

I saw JP in the old Cannon cinema in Brighton. The sound was terrible. That really affected my memory of the film (I'd first read the book when it came out).

[AsparagusTrevor]

Went to see this today. It were alright. That's my review.

[Glebe]

Saw it Sunday night, in 3D (only just made it actually, the opening credits were just coming on). It's better than the shit trailers would suggest, and it's entertaining enough for the most part, but it's just kinda lacking something, and felt a bit staid in places. It reminded me of Skull Island a bit.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Saw this today and it's a ridiculously silly movie, full of plot holes and people making stupidly bad decisions (the bloke who decided to steal teeth from the dinosaur being the worst offender), and it was surprisingly bloodless too, when that character has his arm bitten off he didn't seem to lose a drop of blood. I know that's often the case with this franchise but it seemed especially bizarre here. I was quite enjoying it whilst they were on the island, and the boat trip home, but once they arrived in the US it became a by the numbers creature feature and nothing that special at all. I've an Odeon Limitless card and this is the fourth film I've seen this month so it technically only cost me a fiver to see it, but if I'd paid normal London cinema prices I think I'd have been a lot more pissed off with it.

[AsparagusTrevor]

and it was surprisingly bloodless too, when that character has his arm bitten off he didn't seem to lose a drop of blood. I know that's often the case with this franchise but it seemed especially bizarre here.

Yeah it was, even the last film had a couple of decent scenes of bloodshed but this one seemed toned down despite there being some theoretically gruesome deaths. The death of one nasty character in particular just cut away, it would've benefited from a quick splash of blood on a wall.

It's odd to say the PG certificate 'Lost World' is much bloodier than the 12A 'Fallen Kingdom' (although the BBFC usually seems to be lenient on Spielberg films).

[SavageHedgehog]

It's odd to say the PG certificate 'Lost World' is much bloodier than the 12A 'Fallen Kingdom' (although the BBFC usually seems to be lenient on Spielberg films).

I also think they're a lot stingier with PGs since a lot of people don't think twice about taking 4 years olds to a 12a if its marketed the right way.

[Artemis]

Saw this a few days ago. Some decent attempts at creep-out scenes but it descended into horrible 'how did this get through' expository dialogue of the very worst kind.

"What's this?"
"It's something that will put us in mortal danger if I don't fix it!"
"Oh no! How long do we have to do that?"
"30 seconds and counting!!"

*turn knowingly to camera*

Every scene became "...with disastrous consequences!".

Somewhere in there was pretty decent half hour short.

[up_the_hampipe]

I liked the opening where you could see the T-Rex approaching in the lightning flashes. Shame that the people behind this franchise seem to find ol' Rex too boring so they have to make BIGGER, BADDER, SMARTER dinos instead. Could be worse though, they didn't even invite Spinosaurus back.

[St_Eddie]

Could be worse though, they didn't even invite Spinosaurus back.

I liked the Spinosaurus from Jurassic Park III because it sent shivers down my spinosaurus.

[up_the_hampipe]

I liked the Spinosaurus from Jurassic Park III because it sent shivers down my spinosaurus.

I was 8 when JP3 came out and I saw it at the cinema. This was the moment my childhood died:



So fuck Spino.

[St_Eddie]

I was 8 when JP3 came out and I saw it at the cinema. This was the moment my childhood died:



So fuck Spino.

I'm not sure that I see the problem.  Is it because there was a (presumably different) T-Rex in the first Jurassic Park movie and therefore you didn't like seeing it being killed by another dinosaur?  I get that the filmmakers were trying to show that the spinosaurus was the new big bad by showing it kill the main threat from the first movie but I'm not sure why that's such a terrible thing to do.  It's not as though the T-Rex had a a complex backstory and an in-depth characterisation (it's only characterisation was that it liked eating things and roaring).

[Harpo Speaks]

It was also really curious to see if Gennaro was a sitting or standing wiper. Whole thing was a big misunderstanding.

[up_the_hampipe]

I'm not sure that I see the problem.  Is it because there was a (presumably different) T-Rex in the first Jurassic Park movie and therefore you didn't like seeing it being killed by another dinosaur?  I get that the filmmakers were trying to show that the spinosaurus was the new big bad by showing it kill the main threat from the first movie but I'm not sure why that's such a terrible thing to do.  It's not as though the T-Rex had a a complex backstory and an in-depth characterisation (it's only characterisation was that it liked eating things and roaring).

I was a child who loved T-Rex's, so seeing this new one come along and kill it was very upsetting.

[St_Eddie]

I was a child who loved T-Rex's, so seeing this new one come along and kill it was very upsetting.

Ah, but how is a boy to become a man, unless he sees a T-Rex be killed betwixt a Spinosaurus' jaws.  It's a rite of passage and as old as time itself.

[Replies From View]

Ah, but how is a boy to become a man, unless he sees a T-Rex be killed betwixt a Spinosaurus' jaws.  It's a rite of passage and as old as time itself.

I used to think that the requisite rite of passage was to do all the adventures shown in the Jungle Book and then join forces with a girl who's carrying water.

In the end I honestly don't think it benefited me.

[Kelvin]

I used to think that the requisite rite of passage was to do all the adventures shown in the Jungle Book and then join forces with a girl who's carrying water.

In the end I honestly don't think it benefited me.

The girl's parents didn't press charges, so stop banging on about it.

[Thomas]

In this film, Jurassic World 2: Volcano 2, we see the crumpled, upturned Ford Explorer from the first film. Nice bit of fan service for those who'd notice, and they open the scene with a closeup on the Explorer's wing mirror - and the famous 'objects closer than they appear' text.

The problem is that, in the first film, this text actually appeared on the wing mirrors of the Jeeps, not the Explorers, and the wing mirrors of the Explorer were definitively smashed off during the events of the T. rex breakout. It's amusing that a lot of the fans this easter egg is aimed at are also the major JP nerds who'll notice such oversights and errors.

The film also opens with the Mosasaur escaping from its lagoon and swimming out to sea, to dine on surfers. However, in Jurassic World 1, as various scenes and this official map demonstrate, its lagoon is unbreachably landlocked -

[idunnosomename]

They also cloned a wizard though. You'll find out about that in Cretaceous World II: Wizards On the Loose!

[Head Gardener]

I hear the next movie will take the franchise in a new direction

[Head Gardener]

but the one after that will be the final showdown

[St_Eddie]

I hear the next movie will take the franchise in a new direction nude erection.

Fixed that for you.

[Head Gardener]

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That person is obviously worried about breaking their keyboard if they do that too hard, and is therefore failing to be hilarious enough.