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'Critters' TV Series

Started by St_Eddie, January 11, 2018, 01:52:21 AM

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St_Eddie

#30
The lead puppeteer for Critters: A New Binge has had a little meltdown over at the Facebook group 'Critters ReHatched', bemoaning all those who were critical of the quality (or lack thereof) of the puppets in the trailer and the series in general...

Quote from: Glenn Williams"I don't think I want to stick around here anymore at Critters ReHatched. I was the master Puppeteer on the new Critters: A New Binge I take offense to everybody who's saying just because this is what they've seen on the trailer that it's trash. Well that's a lot of BS."

"There's a lot of people who put a lot of time and effort and a company that put a lot of money into this effort to make Critters come back. it would have been more appreciative of people that had supported that Critters is back, and wait to see the film, series. After you've seen the series, then of course if you think it's too cheesy, to fun, say so if you want. With no storyline but [if] just Critters eating people is what you were hoping for then say so. But this Critters, it will be different; it's 2019 it's not the 1980s folks."

"No, we're not the Brothers, and of course we respect their work and what we had to come from but now the shoe is on our foot and we did everything we could to bring it to you the best we could. It wasn't a multimillion-dollar Disney film, but there definitely was a decent budget and the builds were made professionally not in someone's basement. So I take big offense for all the workers and the people who created the new Critters for you! Guys to say they look like, what you said, let me tell you, they're fantastic I held them, I operated them, I work them."

"Ours is a story and there might be little cheeky moments in there for you to have a laugh or two why not? Believe me the critters are still Krites."

"Not to mention there are some people in here that worked on the film as well as the director and your negative comments aren't fair to the director who put years into making this happen for everyone so shame on you. Make your judgment after you see the film. Don't be a hater give us a chance, please."

Where have I heard this 'people worked hard, so stop saying mean things about muh work, you big poopy head' spiel before?  Oh, that's right; Fred Decker, in relation to The Predator, one of the worst sequels which I've ever had the misfortune to watch.  I'm just surprised that Mr. Williams was able to maintain enough restraint to refrain from trotting out the tired old excuse of "if you couldn't do any better yourself, then you have no right to complain".

He did manage to blurt out these gems though...

Quote from: Glenn WilliamsBut this Critters, it will be different; it's 2019 it's not the 1980s folks."

Probably not in your best interests to point that out, Glenn, considering that the puppets from 33 years ago look hugely superior to your 21st Century creations.

Quote from: Glenn Williams"After you've seen the series, then of course if you think it's too cheesy, to fun, say so if you want.  With no storyline but [if] just Critters eating people is what you were hoping for then say so."

Yes, because clearly anybody who takes exception to the trailer is a dullard, who actively dislikes having anything even remotely resembling fun.  Furthermore, said people also have absolutely no interest in a plot of any description and would just care to watch Crites eating people for the entire duration.  Just as long as it's not fun.  God forbid!

Critters: A New Winge, indeed.

St_Eddie

The review from bloody-disgusting is in...

Quote from: bloody-disgusting.com

Nearly 30 years after the last installment in the franchise – that'd be 1992's direct-to-video Critters 4... the one in space – those lovable Crites are back in "Critters: A New Binge," a brand new Shudder Original Series from director Jordan Rubin (Zombeavers). Made up of eight episodes, the very first Critters TV series actually runs shorter than even the shortest film in the franchise, making for a binge event that'll take up around 70 minutes of your time.

Trust me, that's a blessing in disguise.

"Critters: A New Binge," which is essentially a reboot that bears no storyline connection to the movies, sees the Crites returning to Earth on a mission to rescue one of their own. The journey takes them to California, instructed by their President to bring back the missing Crite and... keep their hunger at bay. Naturally, it's not long before they get really, really hungry.

After 27 years without the Critters franchise in our lives, the premiere episode of "Critters: A New Binge" is, well, an instantly sobering reminder that we're a long way from the heartfelt '80s charm that made so many of the decade's horror movies – Critters most definitely included – such beloved classics. Even on a budget of just $3 million, Critters managed to take us into a fully realized, super charming world filled with tiny monsters and shape-shifting bounty hunters back in 1986, but "Critters: A New Binge" is playing with what I can only assume to be far less than 1/3 of that budget and it shows every single step of the way.

The series' CG effects are so Syfy-level bad that they wouldn't have even passed muster back in the '90s, and the bad news is that "A New Binge" is absolutely loaded with that bargain basement effects work. If you thought the Silly Putty-looking green heads of the bounty hunters looked, well, silly in the original Critters, just wait until you see how they look when they're entirely computer-generated. There was a charm even to the bad practical effects of decades gone by, but there's just nothing even remotely charming about low-grade CGI.



Nearly 30 years after the last installment in the franchise – that'd be 1992's direct-to-video Critters 4... the one in space – those lovable Crites are back in "Critters: A New Binge," a brand new Shudder Original Series from director Jordan Rubin (Zombeavers). Made up of eight episodes, the very first Critters TV series actually runs shorter than even the shortest film in the franchise, making for a binge event that'll take up around 70 minutes of your time.

Trust me, that's a blessing in disguise.

"Critters: A New Binge," which is essentially a reboot that bears no storyline connection to the movies, sees the Crites returning to Earth on a mission to rescue one of their own. The journey takes them to California, instructed by their President to bring back the missing Crite and... keep their hunger at bay. Naturally, it's not long before they get really, really hungry.

After 27 years without the Critters franchise in our lives, the premiere episode of "Critters: A New Binge" is, well, an instantly sobering reminder that we're a long way from the heartfelt '80s charm that made so many of the decade's horror movies – Critters most definitely included – such beloved classics. Even on a budget of just $3 million, Critters managed to take us into a fully realized, super charming world filled with tiny monsters and shape-shifting bounty hunters back in 1986, but "Critters: A New Binge" is playing with what I can only assume to be far less than 1/3 of that budget and it shows every single step of the way.

The series' CG effects are so Syfy-level bad that they wouldn't have even passed muster back in the '90s, and the bad news is that "A New Binge" is absolutely loaded with that bargain basement effects work. If you thought the Silly Putty-looking green heads of the bounty hunters looked, well, silly in the original Critters, just wait until you see how they look when they're entirely computer-generated. There was a charm even to the bad practical effects of decades gone by, but there's just nothing even remotely charming about low-grade CGI.

On the plus side, the Crites in "A New Binge" are practically realized, the work of puppeteer Glenn Williams and his team. In a series that's so CG-happy it's damn sure nice to see some practical puppets on screen, but at the same time, the Crites never quite feel like real characters so much as they do rubber Halloween decorations that are being shaken around by human hands just out of frame. That said, I do appreciate the effort to imbue some of the Crites with individual personalities, and the puppet work is unquestionably the strongest suit of the whole series – props must also be given for the massive Crite Ball, which Critters 2 fans will get a kick out of. But more than anything, watching the series left me yearning for the classic effects work of the Chiodo Brothers, whose Crites felt more *alive* than they do here. There's something about magical '80s effects that seemingly just can't be replicated today.

As for the other iconic characters from the franchise, well, let's just say that the presentation of the Bounty Hunters leaves a whole lot to be desired. There are three of them in the series, and both Ug and Charlie – the only two characters who had appeared in all of the Critters films – are sadly absent this time around. The shape-shifting effects work is rough – the green-screen presentation of Australia, where we meet the show's two main Bounty Hunters, is even worse – and the characters are a far cry from Ug and Charlie. In the original franchise, the Bounty Hunters were one of the most interesting pieces of the puzzle, and they were clearly being treated as an afterthought in the "New Binge" writers room.

The human characters don't fare any better, unfortunately. The series primarily centers on Christopher (Joey Morgan) and his mom Veronica (Kirsten Robek), characters entirely defined by single traits: Christopher eats a lot, which the series never lets us forget, and Veronica sleeps around a lot, which the series never lets us forget. Both of these character traits, it turns out, are tied to a reveal that comes in Episode 6, which is so unbelievably absurd that you might have found me praising it if it were nestled inside of a series that delivered on the entertainment factor necessary to pull off such an out-there bit of nonsense. It's either an amusing idea or the worst idea, and I'm leaning towards the latter.

Of course, I won't sit here and pretend that the Critters franchise set a very high bar beyond the first couple films – I've seen Critters 4 – but "A New Binge" doesn't even manage to clear that low bar. Your enjoyment of this particular entry in the franchise will probably depend on how humorous you find the line "big hairy balls" in reference to the titular creatures, and it seems clear to me right now that I'm probably just too old for such lowbrow humor.

Cheap, unfunny and more Troma (minus the gore) than Critters, "A New Binge" hardly captures the spirit of the films. I've seen fan films better than this (in fact, there actually is a Critters fan film titled Critters: Bounty Hunter that's quite exceptional), and that's just not something you ever want to say about the official return of a franchise you love.

I want more Critters in my life. Just not like this.

What a shocking turn of events!

Check out the comments section to read the comments by 'DoopGremlin'.  A member of the production staff per chance?

Bazooka

At 70mins for the whole thing, I will try and give it a hate watch.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Bazooka on March 19, 2019, 10:41:19 PM
At 70mins for the whole thing, I will try and give it a hate watch.

Oh, absolutely.  I too will be watching this (and posting my review afterwards).

Avril Lavigne

Quote from: St_Eddie on March 20, 2019, 12:03:52 AM
Oh, absolutely.  I too will be watching this (and posting my review afterwards).

Good news St_Eddie!  If you thought 70 mins of garbage to watch & review wasn't enough, there's also a direct-to-video movie called 'Critters Attack' coming from SyFy this July.  And it features Dee Wallace from the original Critters, NOT reprising the same role, presumably due to rights issues.  It looks very marginally less awful than 'A New Binge', which still puts it firmly in the realm of unmitigated horse-waste.

Trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuIc4yd7ZpU

St_Eddie

Quote from: Avril Lavigne on April 30, 2019, 05:53:24 PM
Good news St_Eddie!  If you thought 70 mins of garbage to watch & review wasn't enough, there's also a direct-to-video movie called 'Critters Attack' coming from SyFy this July.  And it features Dee Wallace from the original Critters, NOT reprising the same role, presumably due to rights issues.  It looks very marginally less awful than 'A New Binge', which still puts it firmly in the realm of unmitigated horse-waste.

Trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuIc4yd7ZpU

Heh.  Yeah, I watched that trailer a few days ago.  It does indeed look like crap but relative to the TV series, it looks pretty decent (I can't stress the word 'relative' enough there).  My main issues with the trailer were the P.K.E. Meter, nicked straight from Ghostbusters and the Gizmo stand-in.  I could have happily died without ever seeing a cutified critter, thank you very much.

Still, I'll give it a chance... unlike the TV series, which is still sat on my hard drive collecting virtual dust bunnies.  I just can't bring myself to watch it.  The trailer and reviews pretty much told me all I need to know about that particular shit-fest.  I really should force myself to watch it though, just for the purposes of writing up a scathing review for this thread, if nothing else.

Avril Lavigne

Quote from: St_Eddie on April 30, 2019, 06:22:43 PM
My main issues with the trailer were the P.K.E. Meter, nicked straight from Ghostbusters and the Gizmo stand-in.  I could have happily died without ever seeing a cutified critter, thank you very much.

Yeah the cute 'good' Crite is more of the same stuff I hated from the 'New Binge' trailer, i.e. shitting up the core concept with different breeds and varieties of Crites when they really should all just be identical sentient land-piranhas.

Quote from: St_Eddie on April 30, 2019, 06:22:43 PM
Still, I'll give it a chance... unlike the TV series, which is still sat on my hard drive collecting virtual dust bunnies.  I just can't bring myself to watch it.  The trailer and reviews pretty much told me all I need to know about that particular shit-fest.  I really should force myself to watch it though, just for the purposes of writing up a scathing review for this thread, if nothing else.

I'd love to read your review if you can bring yourself to watch it sometime, I'm not sure how much of the plot you'll have read about already but there's one major twist I heard in a spoiler review that is several levels worse than anything in the trailers.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Avril Lavigne on April 30, 2019, 06:50:19 PM
I'd love to read your review if you can bring yourself to watch it sometime...

Oh lordy, I'm gonna have to do it, aren't I?  I may as well resign myself to the inevitable.  Watch this space...

Quote from: Avril Lavigne on April 30, 2019, 06:50:19 PMI'm not sure how much of the plot you'll have read about already but there's one major twist I heard in a spoiler review that is several levels worse than anything in the trailers.

Yes, I know exactly what you're referring to.  Load of old bollocks.

Bazooka

As a huge Krytes fan, I've also loved/not loved? them enough to watch New Binge. That other one (Thanks Avril) looks like it will be completely devoid of gore, but hey I'm glad it brings in $$$$ for Dee Wallace Stone.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Bazooka on May 01, 2019, 01:54:07 AM
That other one (Thanks Avril) looks like it will be completely devoid of gore...

Actually it's been rated R, so there should be a fair amount of gore.  Movie ratings and trailer ratings (and what they show in terms of gore) are two separate things.