Take a long hard look at yourself in the mirror

[Emma Raducanu]

Still have all my hair.

Haven't lost my looks yet, though presumably this will happen; it happens to everyone? I'm almost excited to see how this will manifest. Tbh, I've always felt I'd suit looking middle aged more than young, when my hobbies basically include reading books and hiking. Think a more aged look would give a distinguised appearance.

[Spoon of Ploff]

[biggytitbo]

Still have all my hair.

Racist.

[the]

The face of a murderer.


Still it's not all bad, I had fun making Fort Boyard

[biggytitbo]

How many dwarfs are buried under those ruins?

[the]

Three were pushed out to a sea-burial in the back of an old taxi, and one choked to death on Melinda Messenger's Lycra-tard (although that one was nothing to do with me)

[Buelligan]

My home is chock-full of mirrors, not a conscious choice but I love light, me.  A friend remarked on it the other day and then I noticed. 

I see long bones with work-made muscles, long, long, hair and a smile I've carried inside it since the beginning.

Off to build more muscles now.

[biggytitbo]

I've got one of those mirrors with the instagram filters built in that make your skin look less blotchy.

[Cuellar]

Apart from balding, I look more 45 than 55 I reckon. Nose looks bigger though and just as Roman. No greying. It's okay.

What was she doing there?

BOOM BOOM

[Brundle-Fly]

Hold a shaving mirror high above your head and look up. Bang! And the wattles are gone. And look at those cheekbones!

The old Zsa Zsa Gabor trick? 

"Alvays try to look up for zer photographers, darlink"

[Replies From View]

There's no way I'm looking at myself in the mirror again.  Not after what happened last time.

[Kane Jones]

There's no way I'm looking at myself in the mirror again.  Not after what happened last time.

Came in your pants?

[Jockice]

I see a spot on my forehead.

I always have a spot on my forehead. I was born with it. And a bumpy bit above it.  It's not exactly elephant man status but enough people (usually little kids) have commented on it during my life to make me feel like Mr Merrick. Which is why I always have at least a slight fringe. Going bald would have been a nightmare for me.

Yet other people have much worse blemishes. I saw Trevor McDonald on TV last week and he had a huge spot on his nose. Has he always had that? Did he ever try to cover it up? Wearing a nose wig or something?

[Brundle-Fly]

I saw Trevor McDonald on TV last week and he had a huge spot on his nose. Has he always had that? Did he ever try to cover it up? Wearing a nose wig or something?

Sir Trev's always had that large mole on his left cheek. Haven't seen him recently; has it relocated to his nose then?

[Phoenix Lazarus]

Apropos of Trevor MacDonald, remember when Lenny Henry called himself Trevor McDonut, but wore glasses that were too big and did a sort of impression of him, reading silly news stories.  Ha-ha-ha, thought I'd die laughing, I did.

Further apropos, once had a dream MacDonald was lodging with us at our childhood home.  He was some inches shorter than me in my dream.  I've no idea if that would reflect real life (I'm six feet near dead-on).

[to infect aside]

I look both haggard & underdeveloped. Thuggish & anxious.

[Neville Chamberlain]

The longer and harder I look into the mirror, the more I actually become Trevor MacDonald - complete with wart-riddled nose!

[mothman]

I should never have shaved my beard off. My face is COLD. I'm growing it back, but it's taking an age, and it all seems to be coming back grey now. Fucksakes.

[doppelkorn]

If I try and grow a beard it just looks like pubes. When I look in the mirror I just see a taut leather membrane holding back hundreds of pubes who want to break free into the daylight.

"We'll make you look like George Michaels!" they chant.

[checkoutgirl]

Not as handsome as it was 5 years ago, but still worth sitting on.

I wouldn't want to sit on it.

[biggytitbo]

I sometimes look in the mirror these days and I hardly recognise the old, angry looking man staring back at me. Then I realise it's not a mirror, but next doors bedroom window I am staring through and it doesn't seem quite so strange.

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

Further apropos, once had a dream MacDonald was lodging with us at our childhood home.  He was some inches shorter than me in my dream.  I've no idea if that would reflect real life (I'm six feet near dead-on).

Trevor McDonald would kick the fuck out of you.

[St_Eddie]

Trevor McDonald would kick the fuck out of you.

Only if he hasn't been fed a sirloin steak on that particular day.  He's known to get violent, when deprived of an expensive cut of medium-rare beef.

Pro-tip: He won't settle for a burger from his namesake.  I learned this the heard way.  Only the finest meats will do, for his crabbiness.

I sometimes look in the mirror these days and I hardly recognise the old, angry looking man staring back at me. Then I realise it's not a mirror, but next doors bedroom window I am staring through and it doesn't seem quite so strange.

That's tremendously funny, you witty chimp. *chucks some theoretical karma your way*

[Pseudopath]

Sounds a bit like that old joke about looking in the mirror and not recognising the old, grizzled face looking back at you, only to realise it wasn't a mirror but a packet of fish fingers.

[St_Eddie]

Sounds a bit like that old joke about looking in the mirror and not recognising the old, grizzled face looking back at you, only to realise it wasn't a mirror but a packet of fish fingers.

But what if you then realise that it was a mirror all along and that you are in fact, a packet of fish fingers.

*cue the Twilight Zone sting*

[Kryton]

I reckon you should be allowed to shoplift mirrors. Essentially it's just a sheet of photons or 'summat. Whereas if you shoplifted a torch, you're essentially stealing from slave labour. Because of the plastic tubular bit and batteries (it all adds up). Whereas you don't need batteries for any mirror I've ever seen. But you never know these days.
I hope this helps.

[St_Eddie]

I reckon you should be allowed to shoplift mirrors. Essentially it's just a sheet of photons or 'summat. Whereas if you shoplifted a torch, you're essentially stealing from slave labour. Because of the plastic tubular bit and batteries (it all adds up). Whereas you don't need batteries for any mirror I've ever seen. But you never know these days.
I hope this helps.

I don't know that your analogy of a stealing a mirror, in comparison to stealing a torch holds up.  That's like comparing a violent drunk to Adolf Hitler.  What kind of monster would steal a torch?!  That would be the lowest act of depravity, throughout the entire history of all of mankind.

[Kane Jones]

I wouldn't want to sit on it.

Drat, that's my Valentine's Day plan scuppered.

[Phoenix Lazarus]

What kind of monster would steal a torch?!  That would be the lowest act of depravity, throughout the entire history of all of mankind.

Quite. If the shop was out of torches because the last one was stolen, someone might go home disappointed if they tried to buy one, then be in the dark that evening because of a power cut, and trip in the dark and break their neck, becoming quadriplegic.  What sort of sick mind could do that?

[nero]

The thing in the mirror leered at me for a bit then poked out its tongue. Seems like a good sort tbh.
Could have a few drinks and knees up with it no worries.