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The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW out loud: The Thread

Started by Nowhere Man, March 19, 2018, 04:03:03 AM

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Replies From View

I think "made a Heather Small wall" should become a CaB meme.  It means any piss-takey, half-arsed yet absurdly thorough response to a frivolous, time-wasting idea.

Memes don't work like that, sorry :(

You ruined any chance it had :(

Barry Admin


Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Replies From View on May 20, 2019, 04:04:17 PM
I think "made a Heather Small wall" should become a CaB meme.  It means any piss-takey, half-arsed yet absurdly thorough response to a frivolous, time-wasting idea.

i thought you filled that bit in

Twed

Wasn't this essentially the only joke that was in Miranda?

Sebastian Cobb

You piss about and make a wall of Heather Small and everyone calls you a genius for your japery, do the same thing with Julia Sawahla and everyone thinks you're a creepy pervert.

It's like there's one rule for hummingofevil and another for Richard Herring.

Replies From View

Quote from: The Boston Crab on May 20, 2019, 05:18:23 PM
Memes don't work like that, sorry :(

You ruined any chance it had :(

We can agree it between ourselves now, and use it without ever telling anyone the origin.  They will never know!

It worked with the rampant CaB usage of Piggy Sue as a verb, and it will work with this too.

Kelvin

Quote from: Twed on May 20, 2019, 05:40:24 PM
Wasn't this essentially the only joke that was in Miranda?

Are you thinking of falling over?

Twed


Johnny Yesno


jenna appleseed

Quote from: king_tubby on May 18, 2019, 08:56:42 PM
Amsterdam, Day 3: 'FUCK OFF DAZ IT WAS A WOMAN IT FUCKING WAS AND IF YOU TELL ANYONE I SUCKED HER COCK I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL FUCKING END YOU'

'It's not me you have to convince, Gary, it's @glinner'


Ferris


Jumblegraws

In response to an esoteric definition of the word "fascist":
Quote from: Gerald Fjord on May 21, 2019, 04:09:40 PM
yes, looking closer at my dictionary now i can see it is in fact subtitled "the bumper book of things that cunt on the internet thinks"

Lordofthefiles

The entire Anus Cop thread in HS Art has had me literally crying with laughter tonight.

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,63786.0.html

I had to take a rest from it at one point (below) to gather myself.

Quote from: BlodwynPig on November 25, 2017, 11:42:58 PM
Anyone got a copy of the rare interview Chip Bigcock (Anus Cop Series' 1-8) did with Michael Parkinson, with Parky goading Bigcock to "show us all your bum...go on...get it out" and Emu shoving his beak up the crack in an unscripted and now censored finale.

The look on Muhammed Ali's face!

Thank you to everyone that posted in the thread, it's absolutely wonderful.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Lordofthefiles on May 21, 2019, 11:38:40 PM
The entire Anus Cop thread in HS Art has had me literally crying with laughter tonight.

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,63786.0.html

I had to take a rest from it at one point (below) to gather myself.

Thank you to everyone that posted in the thread, it's absolutely wonderful.

I was doubled over reading that and then saw who authored it - sometimes humour takes on a life of its own (a collective madness on here).

non capisco

Months late but this imagining of what that Tolkien biopic might be like had me roaring

Quote from: marquis_de_sad on March 14, 2019, 02:11:44 PM
OXFORD AGAIN, BUT BEFORE

A YOUNG J.R.R. TOLKIEN IS IN HIS DORMS, WRITING FURIOUSLY AT HIS DESK. HE WEARS AN OXFORD VARSITY JACKET AND SUCKS A LOLLIPOP

JEEVES: "Anything else, Sir?"

J.R.R. TOLKIEN: "No, Jeeves, can't you see I'm busy working on my great novel for children?"

JEEVES: "But Sir..."

J.R.R. TOLKIEN: "I said beat it!"

JEEVES LEAVES THE ROOM AND PASSES TOLKIEN'S LOVE INTEREST IN THE HALLWAY.

WOMAN: "Oh deary me, I say, Jeeves me old mucker, what's to be done with young J.R.R. Tolkien? He's just so creative and exciting!"

JEEVES: "Quite right, quite right indeed. But all I wanted to do was tell him that a certain Mr Picasso was here to see him — whoever in the world that person may be!"

WOMAN: "Well it's certainly not a name I'm familiar with in 1914."

JEEVES: "Nor I. Well, good day to you, m'lady".

JEEVES TIPS HIS STOVE PIPE HAT AND EXITS.

WOMAN ENTERS THE DORM, A HOTBED OF PAPERS AND IDEAS. SHE MARVELS AT THE CREATIVITY OF SUCH A GENIUS.

J.R.R. TOLKIEN DOESN'T NOTICE HER. SHE TOUCHES HIS SHOULDER.

WOMAN: "Tolkien?"

J.R.R. TOLKIEN: "What is it, baby?"

WOMAN: "Don't you remember? We were supposed to be going for lunch with my sour-faced bitch of a mother."

J.R.R. TOLKIEN: "Look here, I don't have time for such entanglements, I'm working on something big. It'll teach the world all about the true meaning of wonder."

J.R.R. TOLKIEN FLAPS HIS HANDS TO ILLUSTRATE THE CONCEPT OF WONDER.

J.R.R. TOLKIEN: "I'm not just a boring academic, you know."

WOMAN: "Yes that is true."

JEEVES RE-ENTERS. HE IS SWEATING AND CRYING.

J.R.R. TOLKIEN: "Jeeves! What is it now you imbecile!"

JEEVES (holding up a piece of paper): "It's from the King. They've just declared the First World War".

THEY STARE AT EACH OTHER FOR FIVE MINUTES

pancreas

Quote from: Lordofthefiles on May 21, 2019, 11:38:40 PM
The entire Anus Cop thread in HS Art has had me literally crying with laughter tonight.

It's one of the greats. I kind of wish I'd contributed, but the cunts knew what they were doing so what was the point.

Johnny Yesno

Quote from: BlodwynPig on May 21, 2019, 11:43:27 PM
I was doubled over reading that

Well, it's the best position to have smoke blown up your arse.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: pancreas on May 22, 2019, 12:15:35 AM
It's one of the greats. I kind of wish I'd contributed, but the cunts knew what they were doing so what was the point.

Still want the mug

pancreas

Quote from: BlodwynPig on May 22, 2019, 12:30:57 AM
Still want the mug

I actually ordered one. Couldn't help myself. I'll let you know how it turns out.

the

The joke was never meant to be that the show literally involves anuses by the way. It was just meant to be a cop show intro with a monumentally stupid and unlikely name. Still, it seems people find their level.


If you're going to make merchandise, may as well have a slightly higher-quality image to work from:

     
     
     

pancreas

Oh, I'm sorry. Have we criminally misunderstood your oeuvre?

the

No, but you have made jokes about bum-bums because poo does it.

Beagle 2 knocked it out of the fucking park with the Anus Cop annual 1977:

     

Stunning.

Kelvin

Not enough people praised in this thread tell their fans to get fucked. It's refreshingly modest.

pancreas

Please, the—because I'm obviously too smut-obsessed to work it out on my own—do explain what you had in mind when you first breathed life into the concept of 'Anus Cop'.

pancreas

Perhaps we could interview you for a retrospective? That would be your opportunity to squash the rumours that this was all salacious hooey, and remind us of the nobler intents behind your anal opus.

Ferris

Quote from: BlodwynPig on May 21, 2019, 11:43:27 PM
I was doubled over reading that and then saw who authored it - sometimes humour takes on a life of its own (a collective madness on here).

Must admit, I re-read that thread as well because it was so well done and I really laughed at this

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on November 25, 2017, 11:26:18 PM
Bottom-Z [police informant]: I know you and me go a looong way back AC, but I ain't heard nothin' 'bout these here butt-plug smugglers, you dig?

Anus Cop: Well if you get wind of anything, let me know.

...before realizing I wrote it. "Get wind of anything" got me. Collective madness indeed.