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March 28, 2024, 12:13:54 PM

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The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW out loud: The Thread

Started by Nowhere Man, March 19, 2018, 04:03:03 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

DoesNotFollow

Quote from: The Boston Crab on July 17, 2019, 06:42:30 PMWorst case scenario, if the raiders try and storm my house, I'll wipe my arse on all the food and blow my head off.


Barry Admin

Even better if you've read the last page or two of the thread, and get the full context:

Quote from: Flouncer on July 18, 2019, 10:58:54 AM
Tommy's in the jailhouse for tellin' the truth again
I'm on the pavement thinkin' how the trial went
Man in a bob wig, black gown, bent clown,
Sent are Tommy down cos the nonce's skin was brown

Look out kid, Sajid Javid
Better set our man free or face the wrath of gammonry
Don't wanna march, we're a bit parched
Gonna go down Spoons cos the local pub is full of coons

ZoyzaSorris

That is indeed a work of genius. Got it going round my head now.


ZoyzaSorris

The preamble really does make it. Got 'Look out kid, Savid Javid' in Dylan's syncopated nasal honk absolutely embedded in my skull and its pretty much making me smile every time.

Gerald Fjord

Yeah that got me. "Man in a bob wig, black gown, bent clown," is perfect Dylan-filtered-through-EDL

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Great stuff. I laughed. Sajid Javid bit got me too.

Johnny Yesno


Ferris

From the Epstein thread

Quote from: Goldentony on July 18, 2019, 05:43:31 PM
I haven't been following this, can someone some it up quick? The best I can make of it is rich nonce has a Tracy Island type place where he has it off with kids and drinks blood and also has a special plane of his own and now it's coming out that he's everyone's mate and they're all shitting their backs out in case they get fingered as PROPER GEOFFREYS

QDRPHNC

"Shitting their backs out" got a big laugh from me.

touchingcloth

Quote from: Johnny Yesno on July 18, 2019, 07:15:00 PM
From the same thread: https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,67212.msg3898959.html#msg3898959

The content's all quotes so you'll have to click the link.

I haven't been in that thread but...

Quote from: Autopsy Turvey on July 18, 2019, 12:40:30 PM
Well, he was 20, he says he didn't know what right or left wing even meant, and that doesn't seem implausibly naive. I knew people at that age who didn't know or give a shit about such things, and they weren't racists or morons, some of them could already build boats and things. I presume a year means he paid up for a year, received the odd newsletter, didn't scrutinise the manifesto too heavily, before realising the extent of their extremism and walking away. Why else did he leave, though, do your sources speculate on that? Savvy media optics from a just-out-of-his-teens football hooligan?

...I assume this one is a troll, and an excellent one. Laffed.

Flouncer

I'm really pleased to finally get a mention in this thread! I thought this one was funny too; this couplet keeps popping into my head...

Quote from: Gerald Fjord on July 18, 2019, 11:15:22 AM
a original poem i wrote for tommy on his going to prison

You must leave now, take what you need, you think will last
But whatever you wish to keep, you better grab it fast
Yonder Darren Osborne in his van
Twatting moslems back to Pakistan

Look out the rape gangs comin' through!
No irony that we're all paedos too


PlanktonSideburns

Hamfists buttocks made me laugh out loud in a toilet cubicle in work

BlodwynPig

Quote from: PlanktonSideburns on July 19, 2019, 06:02:16 PM
Hamfists buttocks made me laugh out loud in a toilet cubicle in work

Next time you climax i want that image to enter your head...and every time thereafter

PlanktonSideburns


BlodwynPig


Cerys

Quote from: PlanktonSideburns on July 19, 2019, 06:02:16 PM
Hamfists buttocks made me laugh out loud in a toilet cubicle in work

They did the same to me - but without the 'toilet', 'work' and 'cubicle' bit.

Ferris

Quote from: PlanktonSideburns on July 19, 2019, 06:02:16 PM
Hamfists buttocks made me laugh out loud in a toilet cubicle in work

One of the best wimblewrong matches I've seen. The poise, the grace, the energy, the execution.

Marvellous.

PlanktonSideburns

From the twisted mind of steddie

Quote from: St_Eddie on July 19, 2019, 03:43:18 PM
If Sony is going to do something silly like accidentally uploading the trailer without the soundtrack, then I'm going to take advantage.

madhair60


Shoulders?-Stomach!

Context or not, the poll option "I'm 74 with dwarfism you fucking cunt" in Kids in Pubs is very funny.

kittens

talking about that gervais/dawkins thing

Quote from: Cuellar on July 19, 2019, 09:19:03 PM
I'd rather listen to my infant son being tortured.

Replies From View

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on July 20, 2019, 02:02:26 PM
Jeff Garlin: hi Jerry can you close the roof? It is very hot and sunny today

Jerry: no it's one of those old ones that you can't close the roof on

Jeff: oh dear

a duncandisorderly

yonks ago, but these two from the ryan adams is shit cancelled thread:

Quote from: icehaven on February 14, 2019, 09:54:06 AM
And his real first name is actually David! So he purposely chose to use his middle name, knowing it gave him almost the same name as someone already very famous for singing and playing the guitar and probably hoping to benefit from the potential confusion, then gets pissy when it backfires. Bellend. I'[m going to start a music career and call myself Boyonce but don't you dare mix me up with anyone else who might happen to have a similar name! (Actually there has to be drag act that's already used that.)

Quote from: McFlymo on February 14, 2019, 10:00:50 AM
Boyonce Castle

popcorn

Stolen from me, unbelievable:

Quote from: popcorn on August 23, 2018, 02:46:20 PM
When I did the Sex With Beyonce course I opened with my "beyonce castle" joke and she was not impressed at all (had a bit of a telling off from the course organiser afterwards)

a duncandisorderly


Ferris

Nothing in particular, but I always enjoy Captain Z's little interjections.

grassbath

^ Agreed - one of the forum's funniest and most underrated posters.