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Cab Men II: Because fact into doubt won't go

Started by Fambo Number Mive, March 29, 2018, 09:48:16 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

dissolute ocelot


beanheadmcginty

BBC News - Audi drops 'insensitive' girl with banana ad
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-53648638

Do these complainers imagine that Audi have done market research and concluded that their core customer demographic is nonces?

Icehaven

I know ads can get away with being unrealistic as long as it's obvious they're not trying to imply anything false (a few years back there was a car ad where the car turned into a dancing transformer, but I don't think they would have been too many disappointed purchasers sending it back when they realised it couldn't really do that) but Just Eat are cutting it a bit fine in the Snoop Dogg ad where they suggest you can get food delivered to your private jet by hang glider. Unless you can of course, in which case I stand corrected.

gilbertharding

There are a couple of adverts at the moment I find a bit odd:

There's the one for telly. You know the one. Showing on all channels. It's not an advert for televisions. It's an advert for television. Lots of stirring music, and clips of memorable moments which happen to have been on television. A cake fell over. Two men danced together on that show. Some news happened. Blah blah blah.

Well, guess what, BBC ITV Channel 4 and Channel 5 (!): I've already bought television. I am at home virtually 24/7, doing very little but consuming television. I cannot buy anymore of your television.



Then there's one which is even more baffling, both on a conceptual level, and on a similar meta-level to the TV advert.

It's the one with the tooth fairy, which you have to concentrate quite hard on to know what it's an advert for. Of course, it's to persuade people to spend money advertising their businesses (eg, if they are tooth fairies) on television.

But - there's no number to ring at the end. How do I get in touch with these people (whoever they are) to give them money to promote my business? And then there's the question - how many of their potential customers do they think are watching television, in a position to decide whether or not to spend money on advertising? Surely they need a more targeted promotion - they could surely address these people more directly.

imitationleather

Those adverts are probably to fill time so they don't end up with shorter ad breaks and programmes not running long enough. Times are hard in the TV advertising game!

Bently Sheds

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 05, 2020, 08:32:19 AM
There are a couple of adverts at the moment I find a bit odd:

There's the one for telly. You know the one. Showing on all channels. It's not an advert for televisions. It's an advert for television.
The first time I saw that as I thought it was for BritBox, so I was a bit stumped when the channel logos appeared at the end. Are the terrestrial channels starting to feel the heat from Sky subscriptions?

Also, with the little programme clips, what notable bits of Channel 5 output are they showing? Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords? Can't Pay We'll Take It Away? Benefits By The Sea? Hitler's Megastructures?

buttgammon

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 05, 2020, 08:32:19 AM
There are a couple of adverts at the moment I find a bit odd:

There's the one for telly. You know the one. Showing on all channels. It's not an advert for televisions. It's an advert for television. Lots of stirring music, and clips of memorable moments which happen to have been on television. A cake fell over. Two men danced together on that show. Some news happened. Blah blah blah.

Well, guess what, BBC ITV Channel 4 and Channel 5 (!): I've already bought television. I am at home virtually 24/7, doing very little but consuming television. I cannot buy anymore of your television.



Then there's one which is even more baffling, both on a conceptual level, and on a similar meta-level to the TV advert.

It's the one with the tooth fairy, which you have to concentrate quite hard on to know what it's an advert for. Of course, it's to persuade people to spend money advertising their businesses (eg, if they are tooth fairies) on television.

But - there's no number to ring at the end. How do I get in touch with these people (whoever they are) to give them money to promote my business? And then there's the question - how many of their potential customers do they think are watching television, in a position to decide whether or not to spend money on advertising? Surely they need a more targeted promotion - they could surely address these people more directly.

Unfortunately, that ad always reminds me of the sketch from The Armando Iannucci Shows where a couple knock the shit out of each other to extract money from the tooth fairy.

gilbertharding

Quote from: Bently Sheds on August 05, 2020, 09:23:11 AM
The first time I saw that as I thought it was for BritBox, so I was a bit stumped when the channel logos appeared at the end. Are the terrestrial channels starting to feel the heat from Sky subscriptions?


I know there have been adverts for tv before. Freeview have made a few (the only one I can remember is the David Brent Free Love on the Free Love Highway one), and there was the one with the Jack Russell dog selling advertising space. Adam Buxton did one ages ago with an awful twee song on it.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Bently Sheds on August 05, 2020, 09:23:11 AM
The first time I saw that as I thought it was for BritBox, so I was a bit stumped when the channel logos appeared at the end. Are the terrestrial channels starting to feel the heat from Sky subscriptions?

Linear tv is losing to vod. So they're probably feeling the heat from things like Now TV, Prime, Netters, etc. Dunno why the fuck people would have Sky these days unless they watch live sport.

kalowski

Love these adverts for the HiHi phone system. Looks like an Amatrad emailer.

imitationleather

Quote from: kalowski on August 07, 2020, 09:03:41 PM
Love these adverts for the HiHi phone system. Looks like an Amatrad emailer.

Yes what is that piece of shit and why wouldn't they just use the smartphone they already have?

kalowski

Quote from: imitationleather on August 07, 2020, 09:20:42 PM
Yes what is that piece of shit and why wouldn't they just use the smartphone they already have?
I work in the public sector and I have a fucking work smartphone.

Ferris

Quote from: kalowski on August 07, 2020, 09:37:57 PM
I work in the public sector and I have a fucking work smartphone.

I have a work phone and it's complete shit, but incredibly hardy for tethering for some mad reason.

I'm using it to post this on my iPad, while downloading podcasts on my phone, while powering my work laptop and sending emails. Is this usual? If this is actually impressive (I'm not very tech literate) then I urge you to go and buy the Samsung something or other.

JesusAndYourBush


Bently Sheds

Two adverts doing the rounds at the moment that are pissing me right off because of their shitty soundtrack. The first is for Samsung Tab, where the smug cunt creates a PowerPoint presentation and his colleagues all go "good job" thumbs up and the music kicks into some sub-Two Door Cinema Club shite when he's playing his Xbox on his tab, the smug cunt. Fucking dire. Ooh look at me twizzle my stylus and flick it into the hole in my Tab. Cunt.

Second is for the Ford Puma, wiggly lined skateboard park, clapping women singing "Hey. Heyyyyy Heyayay" and then King Crimson's 21st Century Schizoid Man is spliced onto the end with all the subtlety of a steel tipped toecap to the upper lip. Also fucking dire.

Bently Sheds

There's an ad that ends with a bloke in a tuxedo playing a Theremin. But he isn't playing a Theremin properly, he's just waving his arms around in its general vicinity like a twat. Proper fucks me off, that one. Like Ronnie Barker's acoustic guitar miming; hand all up and down the neck whilst one chord is playing.

DO. YOUR. RESEARCH.

Hand Solo

Quote from: Bently Sheds on August 17, 2020, 11:15:30 AM
Two adverts doing the rounds at the moment that are pissing me right off because of their shitty soundtrack. The first is for Samsung Tab, where the smug cunt creates a PowerPoint presentation and his colleagues all go "good job" thumbs up and the music kicks into some sub-Two Door Cinema Club shite when he's playing his Xbox on his tab, the smug cunt. Fucking dire. Ooh look at me twizzle my stylus and flick it into the hole in my Tab. Cunt.

Second is for the Ford Puma, wiggly lined skateboard park, clapping women singing "Hey. Heyyyyy Heyayay" and then King Crimson's 21st Century Schizoid Man is spliced onto the end with all the subtlety of a steel tipped toecap to the upper lip. Also fucking dire.

I am enjoying your anger. Yeah I saw that advert last night and it even cuts before the riff kicks in, for fuck's sake, what's the point?

seepage

Yes, that Ford one is particularly nasty. I thought they were going to ban adverts for these stupid oversized cars?

gilbertharding

Quote from: seepage on August 17, 2020, 01:55:20 PM
Yes, that Ford one is particularly nasty. I thought they were going to ban adverts for these stupid oversized cars?

I think the Puma is a hybrid or electric - for people who have been convinced there is any such thing as an environmentally friendly new car.

There was another advert which used that King Crimson track a few years back... can't remember what it was for..

gilbertharding

Quote from: Bently Sheds on August 17, 2020, 01:50:17 PM
There's an ad that ends with a bloke in a tuxedo playing a Theremin. But he isn't playing a Theremin properly, he's just waving his arms around in its general vicinity like a twat. Proper fucks me off, that one. Like Ronnie Barker's acoustic guitar miming; hand all up and down the neck whilst one chord is playing.

DO. YOUR. RESEARCH.

"You can... whatever that is..."

It's a theremin.

Same advert has a guy sliding across the floor power-chording a telecaster. Makes me want to murder.

seepage

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 17, 2020, 02:29:14 PM
I think the Puma is a hybrid or electric - for people who have been convinced there is any such thing as an environmentally friendly new car.

Oh, I get it now, the car can't decide if it's a piece of shit... or a piece of shit.

Icehaven

Surprises me how many ads still rely on you actually looking at the screen to know what the product is, as if everyone doesn't just look at their phone during ad breaks.

Captain Z

How are we STILL doing these slow whispery piano versions of famous pop songs? Surely nobody is remotely impressed by these any more. It's been going on since, what, 2008?

Hand Solo

Quote from: Captain Z on August 21, 2020, 10:51:30 PM
How are we STILL doing these slow whispery piano versions of famous pop songs? Surely nobody is remotely impressed by these any more. It's been going on since, what, 2008?

1970, at least.

dissolute ocelot

I've had the fucking Birds Eye singing vegetables song stuck in my head on and off all week. It was briefly replaced by Everyone Love Ned Flanders, but nope singing peas are back.

Icehaven

Quote from: dissolute ocelot on August 22, 2020, 11:36:47 AM
I've had the fucking Birds Eye singing vegetables song stuck in my head on and off all week. It was briefly replaced by Everyone Love Ned Flanders, but nope singing peas are back.

Yeah that's eatwormed me a few times, drives me insane, not least because the whole ad makes me think of Noel Fielding for some reason, which isn't particularly nice for me.

The Mollusk

Recently I've been thinking a lot about a couple of adverts featuring characters that need absolutely clattering up the side of the face, lights out, get fucked.

Ignoring the subversive edit of this clip that the YouTube user has mingled with stock footage of dairy farming and a man throwing up in a bowl, I hate the kid in this Cheestrings advert with his smarmy "So, it's... just cheese!" remark. AND YOU THINK THAT MAKES IT ACCEPTABLE TO WALK DOWN MY FUCKING CORRIDOR SNACKING ON FATTY GARBAGE LIKE YOU OWN THE PLACE DOES IT? *WHACK* That's how the teacher should have responded, instead of just adopting a look of mild intrigue. Take a fucking stand, they're walking all over you. They're all laughing at you when your back is turned. You're writing on the board and trying to hide the tears and they're racking up lines of parmesan and funnelling great gobs of fondue up their arses and there's nothing you can do. You let this happen.

The other one is the 1999 ad for the Mattel game "Wiggly Worms". YOU JUST CAN'T CATCH US. Fucking watch me you gang of shits. MATCH OUR TAILS TO THE CARDS, HEHEHE. The smug arrogance of that one worm is maddening. MATCH OUR TAILS TO THE CARDS, YEAH RIGHT LIKE YOU'D EVER STAND A CHANCE YA FUCKIN DWEEB KID, HEHEHE. I want to bite the heads off every single plastic worm on that game and obliterate the mechanism that gives them such frustratingly minimal yet nauseatingly audacious animation. The song is unbearably obnoxious and repetitive as well, considering the whole thing is 11 seconds long. I can picture the scene now, my partner gets back in 3 weeks time and the song is playing on repeat at full volume. I have drawn smiley faces on all my fingertips and bitten them all off. The severed tips are impaled on cocktail sticks, stuck into the backrest of the sofa. All I can say from now until forever is HEHEHE.

JesusAndYourBush

An ad that amuses me at the moment is one for a car and the song starts with "And I love you so..." but the sound is so very wobbly, in the style of Reg Nullify in The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe (I'm thinking specifically the radio version as he's been rendered slightly differently in the various versions but the radio version is the one I've listened to most).

Oh, and I like the singing peas.

Icehaven

The bloody melodramaticness of some ads is getting ridiculous. There's one I've seen a few times recently which I've just muted or zoned out from as soon as it starts as it's all soaring emotive music, slo-mo and something about defending being a stay at home dad and other heart string tugging things, and I've only just now seen that it's for bloody Colgate toothpaste. What?!

Icehaven

The gambling "If the fun stops, stop" slogan really is appalling. If you applied it to any other addiction it'd be absurdly reductive; "If you're an alcoholic, just stop drinking", "If you're really starting to need that Crack, just don't have any more" (although granted Crack isn't currently being advertised). But the gambling industry has done it's bit, it's told you to just stop if it's getting to be a problem, despite the fact that like any addiction by the time it isn't "fun" it's almost definitely already too late to just stop.