Unbearable openings of gaming

[biggytitbo]

I remember renting that and not getting past the tutorial before having to take it back.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Maybe that's why they did it - So you'd have to buy the game.

[Bhazor]

Couple more just thought up

Suikoden 2. For a series that prides itself on its openness the first few hours are god damn unbearable slogs. That is what has prevented me from ever picking it up again.

Portal. Might only be a short opening but then it is a very short game. The tedious first 15 minutes as it drags out the holes tutorial into as many sub sections as possible. It doesn't help that I bought the Orange box for Portal. Didn't really care about Half Life 2 or Team Fortress 2 but Portal looked so cool and original. Then I play it and every puzzle in the game is essentially spoiled by the montage at the end of the trailer. Really made the laborious tutorial feel patronising and slow.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-cO_DIVuSyQ

Banjo & Kazooie Nuts and Bolts. I might be one of a dozen people who actually liked this game. But that doesn't mean I want to sit through that WACKKKYYY opening a third time.

[Norton Canes]

For the Half Life tram ride why not use that cheat thing that lets you move anywhere even through walls? Then you can get a nice close-up look at all the stuff the car trundles past.

[biggytitbo]

Far Cry 3, which I had trouble getting working so had to restart about 5 times where each time I was forced to sit through what seemed like at least an hour of unskippable boring exposition.

[Noodle Lizard]

The opener to Driver on the PlayStation was an absolute chore. It wasn't until about 20 years later that I saw the Bruce Dern film that it all made sense.

Yeah, this instantly came to mind.  One of the worst levels ever.

Seconded for the Assassin's Creed games.  Can't fathom ever starting one of those again, especially III which I swear takes three hours before you even get to play as the protagonist.

[boki]

Black on the PS2's a right hole-mangler in this respect.

[Bhazor]

Remember the first VHS tape in Resident Evil 7? Because fuck that. I think it's skippable on repeat but yeesh that first time through.

[Kryton]

There's a mod for the PC version of Skyrim in which it you can dictate a few choices (starting class / appearance etc) and it'll start you somewhere else in the world map. I tried it once with a Mage character and it started me in a thunderstorm on a ship-wreck which was far more atmospheric than the dull vanilla start.

Can't remember what it was called though, but it's in the Steam workshop.

[Bhazor]

Yeah it's called alternate starts and was mentioned like a month a go you tart.

I tried it when it was first brought up and was quite impressed. It made me remember how shite the combat was in 10 minutes rather than an hour later.

[Zetetic]

Yeah it's called alternate starts and was mentioned like a month a go you tart.

It's called Live Another Life, you wank. "Alternate Starts" summarises what it provides.

[Bhazor]

Live Another Life is the fucking subtitle you piece of shit.

https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=75889890

Oh and can I just say fuck Skyrim Special Edition. Have to go ingame to browse or download mods, you can't play or close the game while a mod is downloading and they somehow managed to make the inventory even worse. That is truly an achievement.

[Zetetic]

Live Another Life is the fucking subtitle you piece of shit.

No, it's bloody not. You've mistaken the result of search optimisation for the title of the mod itself.

" Live Another Life provides an alternative means to start the game for those who do not wish to go through the lengthy intro sequence at Helgen. "

[Cerys]

Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation.  That huge great tutorial level with its intrusive cut scenes.  Fuck off, Von Kroy.  Just fuck off.

[Mass_Panic]

The opening few scenes of Uncharted 3 and 4 are a bit of a chore after you've played through them once or twice. Takes quite a while to get to the actual core game loop. Uncharted 2 however had probably one of the most stunning openings in any game ever and threw you right into the middle of the game right from the get go.

[Blue Jam]

Metal Gear Solid V. I'm enjoying it now but boy, am I glad to have made it out of that fucking hospital. It feels like being in the endless, inescapable hospital in Iain Banks's The Bridge, but with you having to crawl along a corridor at the pace of a snail on mogadon.

[The Boston Crab]

It's absolutely brutal but now you're out, get ready for the greatest open world stealth interlocking mechanics political intrigue incongruous ridiculousness you've ever played. The soundtrack alone is ludicrously brilliant.

[Benjaminos]

My favourite thing is where you start the game, sit through a twenty minute introductory cutscene, control is given to you, you walk three steps forward and kick off another cutscene. What is point. Ni No Kuni 2 was a bastard for this.

Yakuza 3 also has at least two hours of running an orphanage and doing errands for people until you actually get to punch any gangsters. And even then, all the really fun stuff in Kamurocho is gated off until you do another few hours of grunt work. It's still a fucking belter of a game though.

[Mister Six]

Yakuza 3 also has at least two hours of running an orphanage and doing errands for people until you actually get to punch any gangsters. And even then, all the really fun stuff in Kamurocho is gated off until you do another few hours of grunt work. It's still a fucking belter of a game though.

Yakuza 6 demo is like this. Teases you with a fight, then it's 20 minutes of borderline impenetrable "previously on..."

Put me right off it.

[Consignia]

Funny you should mention both Yakuza 3 and 6, because they are both probably the worst in the series bar the spin offs. Not that others don't front load you with narrative, but they are at least meaty once you get into them.

[Bhazor]

I remember 1 being bad too in that respect. But 2 and 4 handled it better. Not played 5 or 6.

[Mobius]

I've been playing the most recent Yakuza and sometimes there's literally 10 cutscenes in a row. You just end up skipping everything or else you'd never actually play the fucking game.