Desolation IV: The Abyssal Plains

[Fishfinger]

A couple have next year's holidays planned

Utøya
Praia de Luz
Soham
Dunblane
Grimsby

In the aftermath, Putin denies all responsibility. Lovely spires and industrial estates.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A man who describes his livelihood as "planing the living shit out of abos" makes sweet unconditional love to a pritt stick.

[Quote]

In a chilly recording studio, 22-your old Chantelle is repeatedly berated over the Babestation phonelines for not having a Poppy attached to her nipple tassles.

[MoonDust]

Graham's nob falls off and rolls out from his joggers into the gutter on his way to buy milk.

He doesn't even notice until his morning piss the next day.

[BlodwynPig]

In a chilly recording studio, 22-your old Chantelle is repeatedly berated over the Babestation phonelines for not having a Poppy attached to her nipple tassles.

https://www.newsflare.com/video/119269/celebrity/danielle-mason-is-shocked-to-be-mistaken-for-a-babe-station

Danielle Mason is shocked to be mistaken for a Babe station presenter by an autograph hunter at the Jog On For Cancer event

[Glebe]

Andrew Lloyd Webber will only leave the house carried on a sedan chair and wearing a solid gold crown. He also insists on spitting his grape pips at the homeless. I have this on good authority.

[MoonDust]

Dave's cock, guts and pelvis are utterly banjaxed after he fucked the washing machine, dowsed and writhing in Lenor.

[Glebe]

A fishwife tosses a priceless Superman comic into the bin out of spite.

[:(]

A man researches his family tree and finds out he's is a distant cousin of Darren Day.

[Glebe]

Rick Wakeman punches a dachshund into submission.

[petril]

Jeff Banks wins, FATALITY

[Chollis]

A sexed up dossier returns home from the nightclub alone. Again.

[derek stitt]

Jon Gaunt post a selfie on twitter asking for a cum tribute.

[the midnight watch baboon]

An Outspan promoter hurls a warm lung at a cold child. Huh!

[Sebastian Cobb]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-46191729

[Nice Relaxing Poo]

A young kid is nicknamed Crisp Packet by his parents after the failed prophylactic that led to his conception.

[Pingers]

A swift CAMHS referral ensues for young Jordan after his Easter Crafts effort: a newborn lamb, its arse stuffed with chicks and ducklings and a dead rabbit in its mouth, nailed to a cross.

[BlodwynPig]

A young kid is nicknamed Crisp Packet by his parents after the failed prophylactic that led to his conception.

Salt & Vinegar strokes
Porn Cocktail
Beef curtains
Cheese and onions

[petril]

Spunky Bacon

[Sebastian Cobb]

Knob Cheese Moments

[Pingers]

Quimvers (sorry)
Pork Scratchings - oi oi!

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A human "being" bearhugs the headquarters of a regional newspaper.

[Glebe]

A fishwife tosses a priceless Superman comic into the bin out of spite.

I already did that.

DESOLATION.

[:(]

A maudlin tortoise befriends a dog turd.

[Hey, Punk!]

A rotund postman methodically sips the pool of lager atop his can, he'd already wasted too much of the froth.

[Norton Canes]

Tony panics and hides in the toilet. Remembering the behavior of his childhood, he licks the porcelain for comfort. Five minutes later he returns to his meeting.

[:(]

Fancy dress party

[BlodwynPig]

Fancy dress parting

In all senses of the word

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A child is a child in Hull

[BlodwynPig]

Christ, she's still going

You feel so at home when you visit a colleague, you sense you may live there in the future.

You're colleague is sleeping in the broom cupboard at work.