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Desolation IV: The Abyssal Plains

Started by Shoulders?-Stomach!, April 16, 2018, 01:49:39 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Dannyhood91


Dannyhood91

Injecting mustard into your sleeping dads dick.

Dannyhood91

A heron is raped to the theme of The (US) Office


Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Dannyhood91 on April 17, 2018, 07:29:23 PM
A heron is raped to the theme of The (US) Office

Absurdly good. Maybe a switch to another animal would make it even funnier.

PeasOnSticks

A half-drunk Steve Rider scribbles down ideas for 'Grandstand: The Dinner Experience,' only to rip up his notepad two beers later.

Spoon of Ploff

A wheezing old man finds a Queens Silver Jubilee mug in his garden shed and wonders what happened to his country.

Norton Canes


Gregory Torso

After a morning of slinging sharp pebbles at cyclists, Compo flakes off some of his impetigo scabs into Clegg's tea.

Gregory Torso

Compo and Clegg cause Foggy to have a Normandy flashback when they take him on an illegal grouse shoot.

dex

The sugar tax renders drinking petrol cheaper than pop. A bag of hot chips is passed round and the family dog steals yours.

Gregory Torso

Compo lies down in a stream under a footbridge hoping to look up a lady's skirt as she crosses. He catches pneumonia. His first course of action is to try and infect Clegg; when that fails, he reluctantly goes to the hospital where he steals three pens and coughs on as many children as possible. Foggy later sells his antibiotics to a farmer as "lamb speed".

Dannyhood91

Quote from: Gregory Torso on April 18, 2018, 01:19:44 PM
Compo and Clegg cause Foggy to have a Normandy flashback when they take him on an illegal grouse shoot.
[/quote

Fucking massive chuckle at that

Dannyhood91

Howard from the Halifax advert punching Emily Ratajkowski square in the fucking chops after a game of Uno.

Proper flattens her.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A shut in pornography goliath is forced to attend a trip to the British Museum.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A buried penis syndrome survivor spills his yoghurt in a vestry.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A panopoly of dysenterists co-evacuate on an industrial estate.

Gregory Torso

Seymour builds a face-fucking machine and climbs up into an old oak tree where he fucks his own face for the rest of that afternoon.

BlodwynPig

I see the heavyweight desolates are having a field day in here. Keep it up.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Ten mail clerks devour their collective body weight in vile rancid chicken flesh without suspecting a thing.

pancreas


Dannyhood91

An uneducated scrote throws a Lobster Thermidor out the window because it's "gay".

Dannyhood91

Percy The Parkeeper knows where the bodies are hidden.

Dannyhood91

A pair of first year students at Sheffield Hallam university solely through references and squeals.

Dannyhood91

Paul Ross's family has just been him in different wigs the whole time.

SteveDave

An office worker posts his suicide note on his company's intranet. It's seen 3 years later when the company is taken over by Chinese robots.

Dannyhood91

A knackered old hag frigs herself off to Disney's animated Hercules and thinks of happier days.

A small, rented room is suffused with the smells of cigarette smoke and store-brand energy drinks.

Dannyhood91


Shoulders?-Stomach!

A park bench carrying the engraving


"R.I.P

Gavin Denton

'Battered Sausage + Peas Wrapped Up'

1978-2018'


Is given a wipe down with an axe