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Identify a probably shit PC game I played as a child

Started by ASFTSN, May 11, 2018, 10:21:15 AM

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Moribunderast


earl_sleek


Ferris

Defender of the Crown looks ace, how do I play this?

Pseudopath

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on May 13, 2018, 03:00:45 PM
Defender of the Crown looks ace, how do I play this?

You can play the DOS version in your browser here. If you're comfortable with using emulators, the much-superior Amiga version (along with links to the WinFellow emulator) can be found here.

Ferris


St_Eddie

#35
Quote from: MjjW on May 12, 2018, 05:16:43 PM
Slightly later mid 90s. Used Windows commands to run this game around same time was playing DOOM I think. Featured a yellow protagonist I think (Not a Simpson or Asian) and was a pointy clicky game. I remember turning taps on and flooding the public toilet floor which revealed something very early in the game.

I'm racking my brain on this one.  I'm a massive fan of adventure games and yet, I can't think what this could be.  I'd say Leisure Suit Larry (original EGA version or more likely, the VGA remake) is a possibility but it doesn't quite fit the description.  Although, looking at the cover, I can see how one might wrongly recall the titular character as being yellow...


Another possibility is Normality but again, it doesn't quite match your description...


It would help if you could provide some further details.  For example, is the game played in 1st person or 3rd person perspective and do you move around the world in 3D or is it played entirely in 2D?

Quote from: neardark on May 12, 2018, 10:11:25 PM
Anyone remember a game called Bioforge? Think it was called that. Used to try playing it on an Amiga 1200 but used to crash at the same point everytime (about 20 seconds) after the beginning which gave it mythical status in my young mind. The main character looked vaguely like Robocop without his helmet.

Yes, I remember that game.  It's one of the titles that I came extremely close to buying, as a kid but for whatever reason, didn't.

FredNurke

Lucky you. That bloody game gave me nightmares.

St_Eddie

Quote from: FredNurke on May 14, 2018, 05:34:48 PM
Lucky you. That bloody game gave me nightmares.



Sweet dreams.  Don't let the awkwardly angular 90's polygon bed bugs bite.

FredNurke

The severed orm [sic] is one of the pleasanter bits.

St_Eddie

Quote from: FredNurke on May 14, 2018, 05:49:18 PM
The severed orm [sic] is one of the pleasanter bits.

The thing is that those graphics were state of the art, at the time.  I remember the graphics being a selling point, back then.

Bhazor

I never played Bioforge as a bairn because it appeared in a retro review in PC gamer who called it an "underrated gem". Every game I played that had been described as that by PCGamer would not work on my computer. Giants: Citizen Kabuto, Messiah, Sacrifice, Startopia, Perimeter. Either they never worked (Giants, Messiah) or the demo would crash after 10minutes(Sacrifice, Startopia) so naturally I became deeply suspicious and assumed it was some kind of nerd talk to mean "This game will not run on Bhazor's computer and he will sit and cry if his mum buys it for him"

St_Eddie

On the topic of early 3D graphics aging badly; compare the gorgeous hand-drawn art by Bill Tiller, 2D visuals of The Curse of Monkey Island, with its sequel Escape From Monkey Island, which was released a full 3 years later...



The primitive graphics of the 20th century, as seen in The Curse of Monkey Island (1997).

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Behold the dawn of the new millennium and the technically superior 3D graphics of Escape From Monkey Island (2000).  That's... progress?

Quote from: Bhazor on May 14, 2018, 05:53:30 PM
...so naturally I became deeply suspicious and assumed it was some kind of nerd talk to mean "This game will not run on Bhazor's computer and he will sit and cry if his mum buys it for him"

He's on to us, people!

MjjW

Quote from: St_Eddie on May 14, 2018, 05:11:10 PM
I'm racking my brain on this one.  I'm a massive fan of adventure games and yet, I can't think what this could be.  I'd say Leisure Suit Larry (original EGA version or more likely, the VGA remake) is a possibility but it doesn't quite fit the description.  Although, looking at the cover, I can see how one might wrongly recall the titular character as being yellow...

Another possibility is Normality but again, it doesn't quite match your description...

It would help if you could provide some further details.  For example, is the game played in 1st person or 3rd person perspective and do you move around the world in 3D or is it played entirely in 2D?

I might be misremembering as I was but a child. I remember getting too scared to carry on a DOOM session after it went black and white and freaked me out too much. I'm going to say 3rd person 2D. Those Leisure Suit Larry games seemed close, but no spark of AHA! Maybe it was a dream.

St_Eddie

Quote from: MjjW on May 14, 2018, 08:07:31 PM
I might be misremembering as I was but a child. I remember getting too scared to carry on a DOOM session after it went black and white and freaked me out too much. I'm going to say 3rd person 2D. Those Leisure Suit Larry games seemed close, but no spark of AHA! Maybe it was a dream.

How about if I pull the relevant toilet scene up, from the two versions of Leisure Suit Larry...


...any memories come flooding back, like a tide from the toilet bowl?

MjjW

My life just flashed before my eyes, after a quick doze. That MUST be it! The EGA one. Thank you memory man. How was I allowed to play such a rude game. No wonder I turned out like this.

St_Eddie

Quote from: MjjW on May 14, 2018, 10:11:30 PM
My life just flashed before my eyes, after a quick doze. That MUST be it! The EGA one. Thank you memory man.

You're welcome, my friend.  I'm just relieved that I was able to pinpoint it, as my self-appointed title as the world's biggest fan of adventure games was in jeopardy, for a moment there.

Quote from: MjjW on May 14, 2018, 10:11:30 PMHow was I allowed to play such a rude game. No wonder I turned out like this.

It was heavily pirated, I wonder if that was what you owned?  It was so heavily pirated in fact, that supposedly the strategy guide for Leisure Suit Larry outsold the game itself, 2-1.

Desirable Industrial Unit

See, I'd have said Operation Stealth.  I'm sure there was something similar in there, along with that fucking rubber band.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Desirable Industrial Unit on May 15, 2018, 02:09:25 AM
See, I'd have said Operation Stealth.  I'm sure there was something similar in there...

Hmm, not really.  You go into a toilet cubicle to perform some spying related activities (uh... that kind of came out wrong) but you don't flood the room.

Quote from: Desirable Industrial Unit on May 15, 2018, 02:09:25 AMalong ...with that fucking rubber band.

You're thinking of Mario Kart.  It's Mario Kart which has the fucking rubber banding.

Kryton

Okay this is one I've been trying to figure out for years.

My first EVER computer game (I think) was on a VIC 20.

The game was some kind of side-scroller. A little space-ship flying left to right. It could fire pixels.

Now the ONLY bit I remember, was a kind of asteroid and you had to fly through a tunnel (or shoot through it, can't remember it). I remember it being frustrating.
I've had a quick look through some VIC 20 titles but nothing stands out.
Can anyone help?




Norton Canes


St_Eddie

Quote from: Kryton on May 17, 2018, 04:44:31 PM
Okay this is one I've been trying to figure out for years.

My first EVER computer game (I think) was on a VIC 20.

The game was some kind of side-scroller. A little space-ship flying left to right. It could fire pixels.

Now the ONLY bit I remember, was a kind of asteroid and you had to fly through a tunnel (or shoot through it, can't remember it). I remember it being frustrating.
I've had a quick look through some VIC 20 titles but nothing stands out.
Can anyone help?

K-Star Patrol?

Pseudopath

Fly through a tunnel? Frustrating? It's got to be Scramble.

EDIT: Ah...there's no tunnel in that clip. However I assure you that it is bloody frustrating (assuming the VIC-20 version includes it).

gabrielconroy

Seeing the title of a thread in Comedy Chat has sparked some distant memory of a game I played on the PC in either the late 90s or early 2000s. Googling is getting me nowhere.

The title of the thread is MST3K. The game in question involved exploring and shooting slightly cartoonish aliens, usually through a sniper rifle of some sort, if I remember right. I also remember it being lauded as brilliant at the time by reviewers.

What game is this?!?!

Bhazor


gabrielconroy

Quote from: Bhazor on October 17, 2018, 08:50:11 PM
A sniper rifle and cartoony aliens immediately makes me think MDK.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMPvRI_04ps

Yes! That's the one! That's scratched a particularly annoying mental itch. Thanks.

Looks pretty shite now, though.

Sin Agog

No way, MDK1&2 actually hold up really well.  OK, there've been a ton of alieny FPS's since they came out, but the world design's still really alien feeling, and getting to play as the different characters with their totally different play-styles, and the golden age comic interludes, reminds me a bit of the ps3 Ratchet & Clank games.  You might try to replay it and go 'naw' in the first few minutes, but I still like MDK if that counts, which it doesn't.

Bhazor

Shiny were one of my favourite developers of that era and MDK was one of the best. Of course that era refers to pre PS2 3d. Rendering everything pretty much unplayable nowadays.

madhair60


AsparagusTrevor

I remember getting MDK free with my first graphics card (probably some 3DFX Voodoo thing) not knowing anything about the game but it was a blast. I never played the sequel though, was that any cop?

Speaking of Shiny, does anyone remember their game Messiah, where you were a little cherub angel thing who could possess enemies and control them? I don't remember much except I recall you could walk them off platforms, breaking their legs and causing them to crawl around in agony. When you died the enemies would say stuff like "killed the little fucker".

Cuellar

Quote from: AsparagusTrevor on October 18, 2018, 11:22:31 AM
I remember getting MDK free with my first graphics card (probably some 3DFX Voodoo thing) not knowing anything about the game but it was a blast. I never played the sequel though, was that any cop?

Speaking of Shiny, does anyone remember their game Messiah, where you were a little cherub angel thing who could possess enemies and control them? I don't remember much except I recall you could walk them off platforms, breaking their legs and causing them to crawl around in agony. When you died the enemies would say stuff like "killed the little fucker".

Yes! I remember that - I see they also did Sacrifice, which I remember being impressed by but not knowing what the hell was going on.