What would you most like to see derail the royal wedding?

[daf]

I HAROLD, take you, MEGHAN, to be my wife, to have and to hold from, this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to suck and to fondle, till bloody revolution us do part; according to Gazorpazorp's holy law. In the presence of Gazorpazorp I make this vow.

I MEGHAN, take you, HAROLD, to be my husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward; for better, for worse, blah blah blah, according to Gazorpazorp's holy law. In the presence of Gazorpazorp I make this vow.



ALL HAIL GAZORPAZORP!

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

This man is an embarrassment and should be shot for the sake of his relatives.

https://twitter.com/williamhanson/status/997790819091468289?s=19

[Attila]

I HAROLD, take you, MEGHAN, to be my wife, to have and to hold from, this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to suck and to fondle, till bloody revolution us do part; according to Gazorpazorp's holy law. In the presence of Gazorpazorp I make this vow.

I MEGHAN, take you, HAROLD, to be my husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward; for better, for worse, blah blah blah, according to Gazorpazorp's holy law. In the presence of Gazorpazorp I make this vow.



ALL HAIL GAZORPAZORP!

Or simply. Sean Connery shows up in a leather posing pouch and demands his rights to the first night.

But it's too late now, Sean, isn't it? T'uh.

[Ferris]

This man is an embarrassment and should be shot for the sake of his relatives.

https://twitter.com/williamhanson/status/997790819091468289?s=19

In fairness, he is getting slated for that

[Attila]

He looks like that 'tu whit tu woo, tu whit tu woo' guy from that one episode of Toast of London.

[Dannyhood91]

The queen looked knackered. She must have been up late last night putting cheese, little sausages and pickled onions on toothpicks. 

[BlodwynPig]

Due to a heavy admin error, Harry marries the actress playing Meghan in the made for TV movie of Harry & Meghan.

When Harry met Meg Ryan?

[BlodwynPig]

Well all the best to Henry and Rachel Goethe.

[BlodwynPig]

The queen looked knackered. She must have been up late last night putting cheese, little sausages and pickled onions on toothpicks.

Phil was very sprightly...no Uno in sight either.

[Ferris]

Phil was very sprightly...no Uno in sight either.

Well it wouldn't be a surprise attack if you could see his Fiat Uno, would it?

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

I need to stop reading that chump's timeline.

https://twitter.com/CBCNews/status/997220213061013505?s=19

[BlodwynPig]

Well it wouldn't be a surprise attack if you could see his Fiat Uno, would it?

clock is ticking...hope the BBC pundits are caught up in the carnage (especially Richard Cocaine Bacon)

[Sebastian Cobb]

Mr Curry's speech was interesting.

[Monsieur Verdoux]

That was an open goal Billy you fucking clown

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

That was an open goal Billy you fucking clown

Racist.

[drummersaredeaf]

Harry gets to the 'I do' bit to realise that he has mild asthma and his wheezy declaration is enough to make Meghan crave Piers Morgan's tadge.

[Glebe]

[Steven]

[poo]

When that pissed-up, rapidly-balding ginger fuckwit ejaculates into your rectum tonight, I really hope you think it's all worth it Princess Meg.

[jobotic]

Mr Curry's speech was interesting.

Mark? He out of retirement? That's nice.

[Blue Jam]

When that pissed-up, rapidly-balding ginger fuckwit ejaculates into your rectum tonight, I really hope you think it's all worth it Princess Meg.

I wonder what The Woke Princess will think when she is woke by one of Banter Harry's farts tomorrow morning. Probably "What the fuck have I done?" and remembering watching The Handmaid's Tale and wanting to cry.

[bgmnts]

I hope he fucks her with his nazi armband wrapped around her neck.

[Steven]

I hope he fucks her with his nazi armband wrapped around her neck.

Careful, lads. This is veering into Trench Humour.

[Glebe]

[Mister Six]

This man is an embarrassment and should be shot for the sake of his relatives.

https://twitter.com/williamhanson/status/997790819091468289?s=19

This response made me laugh: https://twitter.com/Pacmanlfc/status/997796015938920460?s=19

[Glebe]

This response made me laugh: https://twitter.com/Pacmanlfc/status/997796015938920460?s=19

Haha! I was thinking Kryten, but yeah, spot on!

[Blumf]

We now cut live to the royal nuptials:

[dex]

Ronny Pickering generally making a nuisance of himself.

[Glebe]