Most egregious American mispronunciations

[QDRPHNC]

My barber the other day was telling me about some time he spent in Northern Ireland. His pronunciation of Carrickfergus was decent, but Maghaberry really got away from him. Gave up halfway through.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Anthony and Craig cause a lot of problems.

Creg.

The ones of Polish descent can't even pronounce their own surnames properly. Idiots.

[pigamus]

Biggy, at least they can spell 'buoy' correctly

And its us who pronounce aluminium wrong.

[idunnosomename]

Or-RE-gano

BAY-sil

Mostly, herbs

[QDRPHNC]

Or-RE-gano

BAY-sil

Mostly, herbs

You mean erbs.

[QDRPHNC]

erbs indoors

[New Jack]

Shit at Dún Laoghaire also

[Sebastian Cobb]

Or-RE-gano

BAY-sil

Mostly, herbs

cilantro

[Harpo Speaks]

Cli-TORIS. Made that 'Dolores' episode of Seinfeld really confusing.

When in actual fact, and as anyone who has watched Red Dwarf knows, it actually rhymes with 'spit on a wrist', so much so that one could be misheard as the other.

[kalowski]

You CREETIN!
You IG-NO-RAM-US!

[Dr Rock]

It's Creg for me. They even say 'Daniel Creg' the fuckwits.

And pronouncing all Ts as Ds except for if the word begins with T, or the first T like 'Montana', sometimes but not usually. See 'Todally', 'Doody', 'Potaodo'  'Godda Gedda Boddle Of Warder' etc.

I suppose to be fair many Brits use a glottal stop instead of Ts.

[shh]

Cli-TORIS. Made that 'Dolores' episode of Seinfeld really confusing.

Oh no, the socially awkward acolyte in Book of Mormon pronounces it like this - I always assumed it was his touching way of phonologically coping with the sexual connotations of the word. But no, it wasn't even a joke.

Aaron is 'erin' isn't it? How do they deal with 'aardvark'?

[DrGreggles]

You know the Americans - always on the telly, loudness, obesity, teeth, those guys?

You know they have that weird habit of saying words wrong - like aluminium,

There's an ad for Enterprise car rental where the English guy corrects the American's pronunciation of aluminium by saying "it has 2 u's in it".
But it's actually the second i that he doesn't say.

Nothing interesting to add, but it does my fucking head in.

CORRECT THE STUPID YANK PROPERLY, YOU ENGLISH CUNT!

[Twit 2]

Avoiding the usual ones, on watching It's Always Sunny, I noticed their pronunciation of the name of the bar the show is set in sounded like Patties. But then I'd realise it's actually called Paddys. Something about the way they draw out the "a" in Paddys that makes it sound like Patties.

Also sometimes they pronounce parents as parrents. Some of them also say paylay when they are trying to verbalise the name of the famous Brazilian footballer.

Most unusual.

Going back to the 'buoy' example, Charlie Kelly says that in an interview (referring to DeVito in an underwater stunt) right after having said buoyant correctly. Surely should be boo—ee-unt for consistency.

Or-RE-gano

More faithful to the Italian than ours.

cilantro

Fair enough, as they experience coriander primarily via Mexican not Indian cuisine.

[Nowhere Man]

Cli-TORIS. Made that 'Dolores' episode of Seinfeld really confusing.

Well this might be one for the obvious things you've just realised thread, but that punchline now finally makes fucking sense to me after all these years.

[Kishi the Bad Lampshade]

Bernard.

[smudge1971]

You could be really shoooooining out, but you're just here...wonking off.

[Annie Labuntur]

Anthony and Craig cause a lot of problems.

Day 10 in the Big Brother 6 house.

It's MEEEEER for mirror. "Yeehaw! Let's go out and drink root beer, shoot up a high school and look in a MEEEER," as one might say.

Clive James reviewing a documentary about Michael Jackson joked about someone who worked on the Thriller video saying how proud he was to have made a whore movie.

A lot of Americans say duodenum as doo-odder-num. And they all seem to pronounce the l in calm. It's a free country, good luck to them.

[Attila]

Once heard an American pronounce Worcestershire as Worc-ester-shire, which is actually fair enough when you think about it.

Heard one of my countrymen call it Trolley-fogger Square last time I was in London.

I'm not allowed to say out loud the names of any Classical composers' names, because apparently it causes further erosion of Mr Attila's brain or something. (So I do it all the time, like Bernard Black hitting redial on Manny's mobile).

[im barry bethel]

Solder has an 'L' in it, not two d's you daft cunts.

V-heal-cool
Delivery rout instead of route (though to be fair I've never called a wood cutting tool a rooter)

[olliebean]

There's an episode of Seinfeld where they go on about how Marisa Tomei likes funny, quirky bald men. I swear for years I thought they were saying "funny, corky bald men." I didn't know what the hell they meant. I thought it was some weird American slang.

Not sure whether this counts as a mispronunciation or a mondegreen, tbh.

[saltysnacks]

funny, quirky bald men

One thing that annoys me is how some people (in England) pronounce 'bald' as 'bowld' rather than the objectively correct 'balld' as in the word 'ball' with a d at the end.

[mothman]

How do they deal with 'aardvark'?

By shooting it, no doubt.

[Twed]

"Cran" instead of "crayon" kills me.

[Pinckle Wicker]

One that always bugs me is veHICle.

[saltysnacks]

I think the accents displayed on American television (similair to British television) don't show the wonderful variety of accents in God's own country. We get the bland robotic accents, but anyone who listens to Blues or American Folk music will know that there is real colour in American accents/dialects.

[Ghughesarch]

'Erb' is really jarring, especially as they seem to lower the vowel by an octave from their usual voice so it sounds like Cilla Black talking about the hair, there, on her head.
Clitheroe is a good place name to test them with.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

'Erb is graveworthy alone.

In fact I jave bought some plots, gravesites right here. Please enter them forever.

[Steven]

ALL THE WORDS.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

As I say. Start with the gas as a baseline, escalate if required.