Ed Sheeran nearly shits himself on stage, twice

[Keebleman]

I have been working as a steward at the Principality Stadium in Cardiff, and we are currently three nights into Ed Sheeran's four night residency.  (Four!! And on each of the three nights so far he has drawn more than the Stones did at their single gig last week!  And last week he did four at Wembley! By my reckoning, by the time this tour is finished more than 1% of the British population will have paid to see him.)

Anyway, this evening I was mooching about on the concourse when I noticed things were pretty quiet on the stage all of a sudden.  Took a look - no Ed!  The audience were just chatting among themselves.  I asked a fellow steward what was going on.  "I dunno.  I suppose when you gotta go, you gotta go," he said.  A couple of minutes later our hero returned, apologising.  "I've been gigging for 13 years," he said, "and that's the first time that has ever happened."

Then ten minutes later he was in the middle of a song when he said, "Sorry, I'm sorry," and sprinted off again.  Of course there was no band to keep us entertained while Ed grimaced on the can, and in his haste he hadn't prodded whichever effects pedal would improvise a solo.  After three or four minutes he returned.  No apology this time, instead he went into a song (not sure if it was the same one). 

There was no hattrick, he finished the set, but to all of who were there tonight he will forever be Ed Sheeruns.

Anyone else seen a famous person suddenly stricken by diarrhoea in the middle of a performance?

[thecuriousorange]

When can we have tags back?

[Tag] Scrape of Poo [/Tag]

[Ornlu]

Did he say that he had to 'go pee'? I bet he fuckin did an' all. Desolation.

[Flouncer]

He should have gone full GG and incorporated it into his act. I'm sure that song about a crack whore would have had much more poignancy had he performed it whilst smeared in his own excrement.

[thraxx]

I hope forgot to turn off his radio mike while he was on the throne.

[Neville Chamberlain]

Ironically, shitting on stage would be the least embarrassing thing about his "career".

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

No apology this time, instead he went into a song

In many ways the biggest insult of them all.

[Keebleman]

I remember Q magazine once quoted "the drummer of a leading punk band" who during a gig saw the seat of his lead singer's white trousers turn brown.  No more information was forthcoming, but recently I was looking at another Q back issue which featured a picture of The Buzzcocks with Pete Shelley in trousers.  The caption read, "Those trousers will stain..."

[Sgt. Duckie]

When can we have tags back?

[Tag] Scrape of Poo [/Tag]

I'm in love with your blobbby

[Noodle Lizard]

Bizarrely enough, I seem to remember some interview with Ed Sheeran talking about just this happening to him - a few years back.  Is he lying when he says this has never happened before?  Does this actually happen to him often?

It's one of the things I genuinely wonder about with any performance art, though.  I've performed in bands, as well as theater stuff, where sometimes I've been performing for over two hours with no breaks and no potential for a break without completely ruining the show.  Luckily I've never done it for long enough periods of time, but the longer you do it, the odds of you having to perform whilst your guts are going mental drastically increase.  Add the stress and potentially dodgy food choices of touring onto that, and you're really asking for it.  Terrifying thought. 

At least Ed can waddle off stage and return once evacuated, but imagine being in a play or a tennis match or any number of other things where your presence is required at all times.  I'm surprised we haven't had more instances of live performance gastrodoom, personally.

[Brundle-Fly]

This happened thirteen years ago. THIRTEEN YEARS AGO!!! Felt really sorry for her even though she was a Black Eyed Pea.

[Keebleman]

Gary Linekar shat himself in the middle of a game.  He didn't go off, instead wiped his arse on the pitch in the manner of a dog with worms.  Apparently there is footage on YouTube but I'm too scared to look.

[New Jack]

CM Punk, Stone Cold Stephen Austin and John Cena have all shit themselves, so it's decent company.

Also at least two of those have better music out there than Eduardox

[Blinder Data]

That's why a PSS (pre show shit) is essential. Silly ginger bastard

[Sebastian Cobb]

To be fair I've nearly shit myself at work as well.

[Nice Relaxing Poo]

That's why a PSS (pre show shit) is essential. Silly ginger bastard

Something tells me his stools were loose, the lad was probably firing out fizzy gravy at regular intervals.

[Keebleman]

No problems with the Sheeran system tonight, or if there was he was wearing a nappy.

According to the BBC the breaks were for #1s.  I smell (not literally) a cover up!  I've never suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to piss 10 mins after my last one, at least not to the extent that I would risk enormous social awkwardness and embarrassment to relieve myself.  Solids, though, that's a different story.  Several different stories in fact, all unpleasant.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-south-east-wales-44592094

[imitationleather]

Needing to piss ten minutes after you've just been would suggest a medical issue. It was definitely that he had the shits, but you can understand the BBC not putting that out. But everyone will know. Everyone will know.

[SteveDave]

Needing to piss ten minutes after you've just been would suggest a medical issue. It was definitely that he had the shits, but you can understand the BBC not putting that out. But everyone will know. Everyone will know.

Fingers crossed he gets cancer of the whole body and turns inside out with pain.

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

His insides are all wrong from too much partying with sycophants.

[Bad Ambassador]

Interestingly, the first two things I think about regarding Ed Sheeran are uncontrollable diarrhoea and running away from wherever he's performing.

[doppelkorn]

[tag]Ed Sheeran's shit[/tag]

[doppelkorn]

Actually he's fine. Good lad.

[itsfredtitmus]

To be fair I've nearly shit myself at work as well.

Pins and needles for you as well?

[thenoise]

I've never suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to piss 10 mins after my last one

Probably pre diabetic, the fat fuck.

[madhair60]

Ironically, shitting on stage would be the least embarrassing thing about his "career".

Yes, he's doing terribly

[idunnosomename]

I hope forgot to turn off his radio mike while he was on the throne.

Most listenable Ed Sheeran recording ever?

[monkfromhavana]

"I'm in love with smell of poo".

[Hecate]

Ed Sheeranigans
Bungle-Boweled Basic Busker Becomes Bog-Basin Buster.
"Bad Booze" Blamed for Bellends Bottom Belching Bathroom Break Buffoonery.

[gilbertharding]

This happened thirteen years ago. THIRTEEN YEARS AGO!!! Felt really sorry for her even though she was a Black Eyed Pea.

And what about poor old Chrissy Amphlett?