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March 28, 2024, 11:39:19 AM

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VERSUS 2017: Semi-Finals

Started by poo, June 25, 2018, 11:36:35 AM

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thraxx


They could have got better half time pundits in with Gary Lineker than Maggots In His Cum and Badly Positioned Desk. No insight whatsoever and what have they ever don anyway?

pancreas

Well, I've got £2.99 on Knowles, but to be honest, it would be a relief to lose it. God, I fucking hate Knowles.

pancreas

Quote from: thraxx on June 27, 2018, 10:56:19 AM
They could have got better half time pundits in with Gary Lineker than Maggots In His Cum and Badly Positioned Desk. No insight whatsoever and what have they ever don anyway?

Absolutely agree. Maggots doesn't even seem to know the rules were updated in VERSUS 1803 last year. You *do not* need to get both thumbs in for a double-gape. One will suffice, *provided* the palms are outstretched.

Janie Jones

The trouble with watching it live is you have to keep seeing those tiresome adverts for Tena pads featuring the Parsnip Sisters and the South Wales Heavy Cummers.

Ferris


Dugbo, you simple CUNT.

He's been slack.

BlodwynPig

First 0-0 of the tournament?

poo

FULL TIME SCORES


Dugbo 3 - 3 Speculums & Antennae (1 - 2 Gape-off)


Mister Brindley 10 - 3 Nick Knowles




Brindley vs S&A final



Ultimate defence meets ultimate attack!

Live from 9pm Sunday

pancreas

There's gonna be some ANGRY Dugbo fans.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: poo on June 27, 2018, 02:41:24 PM
FULL TIME SCORES


Dugbo 3 - 3 Speculums & Antennae (1 - 2 Gape-off)


Mister Brindley 10 - 3 Nick Knowles




Brindley vs S&A final



Ultimate defence meets ultimate attack!

Live from 9pm Sunday

where was the promised live text commentary?

GentleJoshing

Quote from: pancreas on June 27, 2018, 02:43:22 PM
There's gonna be some ANGRY Dugbo fans.

They're live blogging the semis on South Wales Argus website, and posted some photos of reactions on Alpha Proxima - they're going berserk.

Quote from: pancreas on June 27, 2018, 02:43:22 PM
There's gonna be some ANGRY Dugbo fans.

Another bottling on the big stage. Hasn't got the mentality.


Mr Eggs

Speculums & Antennae had me in tears at the end. I also threw up.

pancreas

Quote from: Mr Eggs on June 27, 2018, 03:25:40 PM
Speculums & Antennae had me in tears at the end. I also threw up.

I mean, but this is why we're fans, though isn't it? It's just the raw power of the game that gets you—that has you crying and vomiting. It's the sheer primal ecstasy of cheering on your hero while he (OR SHE) delivers a bloody, shitty, messy, milkey pwn.

Dex Sawash

Does Dugbo even know he is out of the game?

Ferris

I, for one, am delighted Dugbo is going home. I always said he lacked the finesse to achieve true greatness. Proved right once again!

I hope he quite literally rubs your face in it next year.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on June 27, 2018, 05:56:29 PM
I, for one, am delighted Dugbo is going home. I always said he lacked the finesse to achieve true greatness. Proved right once again!

Quote from:  Walsall Courier, December 3rd, 2006Dear Sir, Recent demonisation of GOAT of Versus Dugbo and his recent semi-final victory over Stourbridge Stirrups in Versus 1942 goes to show what a fickle lot the people of the West Midlands are. It wasn't so long ago that our very own Wonky Wally was being derided by all and sundry and we all know what happened to the mighty Willy (back-to-back British Versus champ 2004-2005). I think it would be wise to not follow, sheepishly, the general mindless public mania that regards Dugbo as a lazy, incompetent AND FOREIGN competitor, and stick to focusing on lending your support to the great competitor. He will be a multiple-champion in years to come. Nailed on. Yours, FerrisWheelBueller

Mr Eggs

Quote from: Janie Jones on June 27, 2018, 12:14:48 PM
The trouble with watching it live is you have to keep seeing those tiresome adverts for Tena pads featuring the Parsnip Sisters and the South Wales Heavy Cummers.

Tena PRO-LAPSE needs to fly. They spent millions on it and I can't really see a market outside the care industry.

Ferris

I had some identity theft issues during the mid-'00s which explains that out-of-context article away perfectly.

GentleJoshing

https://twitter.com/MrNickKnowles/status/1011700584896974848?s=09
QuoteSo beautiful in South Wales today

By Christ he'll have a different perspective today from his anal convalescence chamber.

hamfist

Did you see Dugbo just walk off after the match ?

Just walked out the door, off down the road with that gormless face of his, his permaboner bobbing lazily in front of him.

Where will he go ?

Who will he meet ?

BlodwynPig

Quote from: hamfist on June 27, 2018, 08:58:20 PM
Did you see Dugbo just walk off after the match ?

Just walked out the door, off down the road with that gormless face of his, his permaboner bobbing lazily in front of him.

Where will he go ?

Who will he meet ?


on pigeon street *coo, coo*

Mr Eggs

Quote from: GentleJoshing on June 27, 2018, 08:54:57 PM
https://twitter.com/MrNickKnowles/status/1011700584896974848?s=09
By Christ he'll have a different perspective today from his anal convalescence chamber.

Dugbo is wearing him. Found what was left of him in a skip.

Dugbo now in Shipping Forecast zone LUNDY.

Ferris

In fairness, has anyone heard from "Tiger" Tim Henman since the first round? He was walking in a very unusual fashion and I just want to make sure he got home alright.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on June 28, 2018, 12:35:33 AM
In fairness, has anyone heard from "Tiger" Tim Henman since the first round? He was walking in a very unusual fashion and I just want to make sure he got home alright.

Cocoa and crumpets in front of Last of the Summer Wine before a vicious bully ramming by disappointed grandmother.

GMTV

A lot of hate for Knowles, and I understand why. But you have to admire the grit and determination he showed to drag his way into the semis.

thraxx

Quote from: GMTV on June 29, 2018, 12:40:25 PM
A lot of hate for Knowles, and I understand why. But you have to admire the grit and determination he showed to drag his way into the semis.

Yes, but cross-dressing goes against the spirit of the game, even though we are seeing more and more of it in modern Versus. Dugbo doesnt need, and is incapable of those type of gimmicks. It's that old fashioned style that people find so endearing. Well, that and the 16 inch force of nature he keeps in, or more likely out, of his space dungarees.

seepage

Will S&A go for 4-4-2 in the final?