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Ever Been Hustled?

Started by Wet Blanket, July 10, 2018, 02:34:16 PM

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Wet Blanket


On that Romesh Raganathan travel show he went with a bloke to a place in Ethiopia where they 'clean your eyes' by shoving cotton wool into the socket and making you hold it there for twenty minutes. When they pulled it out the cotton wool was covered in dust and little bits of wood; Romesh was convinced it was a bait and switch.

It reminded me of one I'd heard about in india where someone offers to clean your ears, and they somehow pul out a stone from in there and demand big bucks.

The other day I was at a remote rural train station with two other blokes. The first one approached me asking how long/how much it would cost to travel to London, and then complained he wouldn't be able to afford it, but then returned to his pal. But a few minutes later the pair of them approached me and he asked to borrow my phone, because he needed to call his friend in London and had no credit. I sort of timidly lied that I'd run out of free minutes and they backed off. But that was a scam wasn't it? I reckon anyway.

So have you ever been hustled? I'm always amazed that people fall for three-card monty. It's so well known its the archetype for all-street hustles and must be taught on day one of grift school, but there's always some sap left looking bamboozled with no money in his wallet.

Danger Man

To my eternal shame my concept of myself as a sophisticated international playboy took a hammering when some bloke tied a bit of string to my wrist when I was leaving a metro station in Paris and demanded I pay him for the 'gift'.

I paid. He was big, black and scary.

paruses

The woman in Powerhouse in Southend sold me an extended warranty on a washing machine way back in 1998. I still beat myself up about how I fell for it.

Wet Blanket

My parents came home from their holiday in Spain one year with a couple of paper Bart Simpsons with string legs, convinced that they danced if you put them near a stereo.

I once bought one of those 'joke' magazines from a rough looking geezer raising money for 'the unemployed'. It was a photocopied load of sub-Jim Davidson 'An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scotsman...' gags and to this day I am ashamed of being conned into that purchase

checkoutgirl

In Paris this March I was at the Basilica thing and had already read about the guys coming up with plaited wool bracelets that they somehow get on your wrist and then demand money, often marching people down to the cash machine with menaces. On the way down the hill one of them put his hand out to shake mine and I instinctively shook his hand. Went to get my hand back and the cunt wasn't letting go. "I am not a bad man, I am not a bad man" he said, I could see the shitty plaited bracelets in his other hand. I just said "No" about 10 times and dragged my hand back into my possession and made off on foot in the opposite direction. A close one.

So no, I've never been hustled. Well apart from that one time I bought piece of turf off a lad in the street in Rathmines for 50 quid in 1999 but I was 20 years old and silly.

Soup

Hustled in the stupidest way possible in Prague. I'd just got some Koruna out of the cash machine when a scruffy, dodgy, down-on-his-luck-Ricky-Tomlinson looking fella comes up to me and says ah, what a nice shirt I have on. And it's a vintage Everton strip so obviously I'm excited and start chatting to him about, God knows, Bob Latchford or something, and asking him if he follows the football in Czechia and what's his team and so on. And then casually he asks me if I can change a 1000 koruna note for a couple of 500s and I say yeah mate of course and so we swap em and turn away from each other to part when, without even looking down at what the guy's given me, I think "What in the fuck are you doing you total moron." And then I turn back round to find him but it's a busy summer saturday by the Old Town Square and somehow this massive guy has made himself disappear. Dunno what I expected to happen when I found him mind, he was twice the size of me and I could prove nothing. Anyway, he'd given me two 500 notes of some ex-soviet country's currency, can't remember which but it was worth about a quid. It was so egregiously stupid of me that I couldn't even be that upset, so I went for a beer instead. Years later I used the 500s to light a cigar, because I am a total bellend.

checkoutgirl

Quote from: Danger Man on July 10, 2018, 02:36:43 PM
To my eternal shame my concept of myself as a sophisticated international playboy took a hammering when some bloke tied a bit of string to my wrist when I was leaving a metro station in Paris and demanded I pay him for the 'gift'.

I paid. He was big, black and scary.

That's the thing, it's barely a scam at all. The Sting was a scam. This Paris thing is basically one piece of twine away from strong arm robbery.

shiftwork2

Almost.  In Venice Beach there was a man putting on a show of juggling and whatnot.  He was just about competent at it.  What set it apart was his manner of controlling the crowd.  He'd amassed a good five or six dozen punters before he launched into a speech about some bad people wanting 'a free show' and how it was absolutely incumbent on everyone to pay.  At this point he saw, or pretended to see, someone at the back leaving so he sprinted after them.  The crowd was large enough for most people not to see if it was legit or not.  The ploy worked, by and large.  He then returned and actually told everyone to hold up as much green as they could afford and used a long-reach granny grabber to collect the dollars.  I would say most people complied.  Pure bullshit and confidence.  Didn't get a bean out me.

Rich Uncle Skeleton

Quote from: Wet Blanket on July 10, 2018, 02:44:51 PM
My parents came home from their holiday in Spain one year with a couple of paper Bart Simpsons with string legs, convinced that they danced if you put them near a stereo.


Hahaha I'd forgotten all about those! Some surly guy would sell them in Bath all the time, if he thought you were whispering to a friend that they were obviously bollocks he'd try to shame you by turning his boombox off (so theyd magically stop dancing) and glare at you.



Don't know if this counts but a month or two ago I had some woman constantly coming in and out of the shop I work in one day chatting rubbish for a good hour. It got to the point where I thought if I ignore her she'll fuck off but instead when my back was turned to replace a bin she took off with a charity tub we had chained to the till.

Still pisses me off, and I know there was over 50 quid in there since we'd mined it for change and replaced it with notes a few weeks before. I'm sure she couldn't believe her luck.

Quote from: Soup on July 10, 2018, 02:47:42 PM
Years later I used the 500s to light a cigar, because I am a total bellend.

I like this ending. The best revenge is living well.

iamcoop

I once got accosted by a man of Asian appearance with a particularly bad lazy eye, dressed in a black suit and a black turban outside Selfridges a couple of years ago. I can't really remember why I allowed him to ramble on but he basically asked me a couple of random number based questions and then correctly guessed the date of my birthday. He then rather aggressively demanded money for this 'trick' and when I started laughing and politely declined he started shouting something in a language I'm not familiar with in a hypnotic and odd way which I could only assume was him putting some sort of hex on me.

Does this count? It sounds fairly innocuous and funny in hindsight but I remember it left me fairly shaken at the time as I'm a pretty pathetic individual.

Captain Z

Quote from: Wet Blanket on July 10, 2018, 02:34:16 PM
On that Romesh Raganathan travel show he went with a bloke to a place in Ethiopia where they 'clean your eyes' by shoving cotton wool into the socket and making you hold it there for twenty minutes. When they pulled it out the cotton wool was covered in dust and little bits of wood; Romesh was convinced it was a bait and switch.

What do they do with your eyeballs while they're out of the sockets?

QDRPHNC

Once. Tried to buy cocaine once off a chap in Toronto's gay area. I was very drunk. So he took my money and then tried to run away. So my gay friend ran after this gay drug dealer and jumped on him and started punching him in the head. Then we ran away, then he caught up with us and grabbed my friend and started pretend-stabbing him with a non-existent knife. Then he ran away. Then we went to a gay bar. Actually now that I think about that, that might have been more of a fight than a hustle. A fistle.

Wet Blanket

Quote from: Captain Z on July 10, 2018, 03:17:34 PM
What do they do with your eyeballs while they're out of the sockets?

Honestly I think they pushed them into his brain. It was horrifying to watch.

St_Eddie

#13
I'll just repost the following, seeming as it's relevant...

Quote from: St_Eddie on November 27, 2017, 05:35:17 PM
I traveled to Ibiza with two friends and on our first day there (of a two week holiday), we were stopped by three very large and incredibly affable Jamaican women on the street, near the beach.  The asked us whether we were on holiday and then flung a few pleasantries our way and paid us several flattering compliments, such as when they cooed "ooohhh, you're very handsome young men".  They then proceeded to adorn all three of us with some cheap beaded necklaces.  Before we could even so much as 'admire' the workmanship of the beaded necklaces, the women had already begun braiding some equally cheap beads into our hair.  It all seemed very welcoming indeed and I can still recall the thought of 'what a friendly place Ibiza is' rushing through my excited and naive 18 year old mind.

That's when things turned nasty; the rotund ladies' demure suddenly shifted and hands were thrust in our direction, palms out-stretched.  "You pay us now" said one lady with considerable tenacity.  Our awkward teenage selves tried to explain that we thought that the beaded necklaces and braids were free but these increasingly irate ladies were having none of it and one can only assume that their business had a strict 'no returns' policy.  The head witch of this Jamaican coven started getting physical with my one of my friends; "YOU PAY NOW.  GIVE US MONEY!", she hollered.  My friend produced his wallet and handed the woman what must have been the equivalent of about £10.  Well, apparently these bead necklaces and braids were deceptive in their cheapness.  Apparently, they must have been crafted from the finest materials known to man, as the now steaming cunt grabbed my friend's wallet and took all of the money from within (around £400).

We then shuffled away, shell shocked, confused and forlorn at the events which had just transpired.  The friend who had foolishly allowed the woman to grab his wallet, insisted that my other friend and I cover the cost three-ways.  We reluctantly agreed and so we were now stuck in Ibiza with around £100 pounds each to our name left over, to last us two whole weeks.  We had no other choice but to carefully space out our nights on the town, due to our crippling lack of funds and as such, a great deal of those two weeks were spent in our crappy package inclusive hotel room, being miserable and eating pot noodles.  As a group, stuck in a confined space (the hotel room consisted of a single room with three beds and a small kitchen area) we inevitably eventually had a falling out and then started heading off into the local area to get drunk by ourselves, whenever we could afford it.

On one of the few nights out which I could afford, without Curly and Moe, I made my way to a bar, where a barmaid was going around the tables asking whether people wanted to pay a small fee to enter a raffle, which was offering a large cash prize to the solitary winner.  When it was my turn to be asked, I politely but solemnly declined and explained my reason for doing so (as small as the raffle's entrance fee was, it would mean one less drink of foul tasting, cheap swill and the only thing keeping me from the brink of insanity at this point was said foul tasting, cheap swill).  Following my explanation of my predicament, the barmaid lent a little closer, with pity in her eyes and quietly said "you should enter.  You'll win.  Trust me".

At this point, I figured the chances are that this is another scam but what the hey, the bastards might as well have the shirt off my back at this point, so I handed over the entrance fee.  Thankfully, the barmaid had clearly rigged the raffle and my number was called as the winning ticket.  Usually I would be morally opposed to such a corrupt system but then again, usually a corrupt system doesn't work in my favour and besides; I needed this money.  I got the equivalent of a £50 boost to my pitiful funds and thanked the barmaid profusely.  She seemed a little annoyed at how unsubtle I was being in my thanking of her for rigging the raffle and I sensed that she probably regretted helping me out now.

Still, at least that was one of the two things which happened during my two weeks in Hell, which wasn't a total write off.  The other being a lovely and sweet German girl named Andrea, who I met up with over several nights, eventually hooked up with and stayed in contact with via e-mail for a few months after arriving back in England.  God bless you, Andrea, wherever you may be these days.  You helped keep me sane.

My overall advice is to avoid Ibiza like the plague and also, fat Jamaican women offering beaded necklaces and braids.  German women named Andrea are a-okay though.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aside from that, last year I had a phone call on my mobile and when I answered it the person on the other end said that they were from my mobile service provider and as I'd been a loyal customer, they wanted to offer me a new phone.  My internal scam alert bells started ringing, so I declined.  What do others think; a scam or not?  I'm thinking that if I'd expressed an interest, they would have started asking me for my bank card details.

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Quote from: Wet Blanket on July 10, 2018, 02:34:16 PM
The other day I was at a remote rural train station with two other blokes. The first one approached me asking how long/how much it would cost to travel to London, and then complained he wouldn't be able to afford it, but then returned to his pal. But a few minutes later the pair of them approached me and he asked to borrow my phone, because he needed to call his friend in London and had no credit. I sort of timidly lied that I'd run out of free minutes and they backed off. But that was a scam wasn't it? I reckon anyway.

It might have been innocent but you were right to be catious.  If it were a scam, then do you reckon that they were going to run off with your phone?

Depressed Beyond Tables

Quote from: Wet Blanket on July 10, 2018, 02:44:51 PM
My parents came home from their holiday in Spain one year with a couple of paper Bart Simpsons with string legs, convinced that they danced if you put them near a stereo.

No response with Nick Cave.

Sony Walkman Prophecies

New to London and walking down the Seven Sisters road in brogues and a crisp linen suit a Bulgarian girl asked me for help. Told me she was broke and needed food. Kept clinging to my arm and calling me "brother". Asked her where the nearest shop was so I could buy her a few things to tide her over. She briskly walked me to the nearest 7-11 where everyone spoke Bulgarian and her sister was lounging outside on a bench. Ended up spending about £30 for various foodstuffs, having handed the money over to someone who was very probably her Dad or a close relative. I was doing alright at the time though so didn't particularly mind being ripped off. And my feeling has often been that if you're desperate enough to scam people in the street, you're probably more in need of my money than I am - though admittedly I wouldn't apply this rule to the average English. Hop on the dole like everyone else.

A similar thing happened to me during this period on the Chiswick High Road. A very young and pretty East European girl approached me and told me she was homeless. Was begging me to let her kip at my place. Might have been legitimate. Though I suspect within half an hour of getting her in I'd have had about 5 Uris on my case; offering to remove all my possessions to an undisclosed location free of charge. I didn't take her up on it anyway so I guess I'll never know.


steve98

I bought some "Chantel #1" perfume from a guy on a street corner a few decades ago for my Mum. (I was only 10). It had a dead fly in it.

Some of you cunts need to get your nous mechanisms sorted out, sharpen up a bit (and toughten up too).

sevendaughters

Once, still rattles me. I got off the train at Manchester Victoria to spend the last few quid I had in the world on some records. Some guy accosts me and talks my ear off about signing up to this card scheme for students (I was about to become a student, I was 18) that gets you into all these clubs for free, gets you money off various promotions, yadda yadda, I'm cringing as I type, and it's just £35 down and I get a free ferry to Amsterdam.

I say I'll think about it and he keeps chatting to me as I walk away and follows me all the way to the cashpoint clear outside Victoria at the Co-Op at the bottom of Balloon St. I pay the money and then realise I have nothing for records so I go home, literally a 2hr roundtrip to get hustled. They had a phone number that I rang to try and get the money back and no one ever picked up. My dad just said I hadn't the brains I was born with and threw the card in the bin. Oh and the ferry went from Harwich so that would have been no use to a Manchester-based student.

SteveDave

My friend Ed once spent about 15 minutes waiting for a man to come back with a £5 note in exchange for the 5 £1 coins he'd given him for the parking meter in Brixton. It took all of my band to convince him that he'd been swindled. Ed sees the goodness in everybody.

nugget

Last year I was loitering around the Fernsehturm in Berlin like a typical idiot tourist and a small asian-looking girl tugged at my elbow and shoved some kind of petition in my face. It appeared to be something to do with deaf-dumb kids and she made gestures to indicate she couldn't speak or hear, and the 'petition' was requesting donations. I was a bit confused but, if only to get rid of her, I filled in my name and gave her the smallest amount of cash I had (a 5 Euro note). Amazingly she seemed offended by this, and pointed to a bit on the petition that said "minimum donation 10 Euros". Obviously at this point it clicked that it's a scam and I gestured to her to go away but she was persistent in trying to get me to donate another 5 Euros. I couldn't believe the cheek of it. She eventually left me alone when she spotted some other sucker to try it on with.

I've heard this kind of scam is quite common in some cities but I honestly had no inkling until she deemed my initial donation unacceptable. If she hadn't been so pushy I'd probably still believe it was a legitimate collection, and would have gone to sleep that night with a nice, fuzzy feeling as a result of my remarkable generosity.


shiftwork2

^ Berlin does have posters around warning of that scam in particular, nearly fell for it myself.

Icehaven

An attempted hustle happened to me in my own house. A Russian housemate (who already had form nicking food and cutlery, and who I'd overheard asking other housemates for loans of 3 or 6 quid here and there at various times) (and who was a Uni law lecturer too as it happens) approached me in the corridor and asked if he could borrow £3 for bus fare to get to church (nice detail) and said he'd pay me back the following day. I told him I didn't have any money on me (which might even have been true) and that there was a cashpoint over the road, and that it wouldn't be worth asking to borrow money from me ever again as I never have money on me or keep any in the house (which isn't true but there was no way I'd ever have lent him a dime, never mind any legal tender.) That might sound harsh but I'd never so much as had a conversation with him other than to ask him to stop singing loudly in the bathroom at midnight as he was keeping me awake, and I'm sorry if you're skint but it's still not on to steal food from your housemates or hoard every teaspoon you can get your hands on. And it was the ''...to get to church'' detail that pissed me off the most, it's pretty fucking insulting to even try that on someone, and downright stupid to try it on someone you don't know. If he'd said he wanted it for booze or fags I'd probably have been more amenable (but still said no).

Quote from: St_Eddie on July 10, 2018, 03:44:45 PM
If it were a scam, then do you reckon that they were going to run off with your phone?

Maybe they would have called some extremely expensive premium rate number that they have set up.

bgmnts

Eating chips near the entrance of Harrods.

Big bastard bouncers hustled me away quietly and efficiently.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: icehaven on July 10, 2018, 05:18:18 PM
An attempted hustle happened to me in my own house. A Russian housemate (who already had form nicking food and cutlery, and who I'd overheard asking other housemates for loans of 3 or 6 quid here and there at various times) (and who was a Uni law lecturer too as it happens) approached me in the corridor and asked if he could borrow £3 for bus fare to get to church (nice detail) and said he'd pay me back the following day. I told him I didn't have any money on me (which might even have been true) and that there was a cashpoint over the road, and that it wouldn't be worth asking to borrow money from me ever again as I never have money on me or keep any in the house (which isn't true but there was no way I'd ever have lent him a dime, never mind any legal tender.) That might sound harsh but I'd never so much as had a conversation with him other than to ask him to stop singing loudly in the bathroom at midnight as he was keeping me awake, and I'm sorry if you're skint but it's still not on to steal food from your housemates or hoard every teaspoon you can get your hands on. And it was the ''...to get to church'' detail that pissed me off the most, it's pretty fucking insulting to even try that on someone, and downright stupid to try it on someone you don't know. If he'd said he wanted it for booze or fags I'd probably have been more amenable (but still said no).

That's not even a hustle, it's just begging.

Neomod

Quote from: nugget on July 10, 2018, 04:36:27 PM
Last year I was loitering around the Fernsehturm in Berlin like a typical idiot tourist and a small asian-looking girl tugged at my elbow and shoved some kind of petition in my face. It appeared to be something to do with deaf-dumb kids and she made gestures to indicate she couldn't speak or hear, and the 'petition' was requesting donations. I was a bit confused but, if only to get rid of her, I filled in my name and gave her the smallest amount of cash I had (a 5 Euro note). Amazingly she seemed offended by this, and pointed to a bit on the petition that said "minimum donation 10 Euros". Obviously at this point it clicked that it's a scam and I gestured to her to go away but she was persistent in trying to get me to donate another 5 Euros. I couldn't believe the cheek of it. She eventually left me alone when she spotted some other sucker to try it on with.

Yeah this one happens on the steps of the Sacre Coeur. Quite funny to see them all suddenly regain their hearing when the gang leader blows his whistle.

This was one of 3 attempted scams on our last trip to the city of lights. Another was some old bag with a 'letter' the second we came out of Gare du Nord and the third the old ring trick.

Fucked em all off as they were so obvious it's like they weren't even trying.

Twed

Paris was absolutely crawling with "I found a ring" and "I'll this string to you" and "I'll draw you for 80 euros" and "I'm deaf and small" scammers. It was exhausting and depressing.

Sebastian Cobb

Not quite the same thing but on the cycle path by the Tall Ship there were two chuggers yesterday and one of them was cheerfully trying to flag down cyclists in a bright red shelter vest with incredibly limited success. I think the other one knew they were on a hiding to nothing.

Zetetic

Quote from: Sony Walkman Prophecies on July 10, 2018, 04:21:34 PM
New to London and walking down the Seven Sisters road in brogues and a crisp linen suit
I want to hear about this hustle.

Ferris

I nearly got hustled at a bar in Toronto. Turns out the Ukrainian lads genuinely were friendly to strangers, not great at English, and bloody awful at shuffleboard.

We won a lot off them (despite my initial misgivings), then said get us a drink instead which they did and it was all a good laugh.

Does this count y/n?