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Would you report your neighbour for flouting a hosepipe ban?

Started by Icehaven, July 17, 2018, 11:37:35 AM

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Icehaven

Just watching a news report about the forthcoming hosepipe ban in the North West, and it included an encouragement to report any neighbours if you see them ignoring the ban. I really don't think I'd do that, I'd feel like a right twunt. I have no hosepipe myself and no need to use one, and if I did I'd adhere to a ban, however I just don't think I could go as far as actually reporting someone else. I don't live in the ban area anyway so it's academic but it's likely going to be expanded. Would you grass on someone watering theirs?



holyzombiejesus

No but I'd slag them off in my head. Flouting the ban is far worse than snitching.

pancreas

I hope I would have the wherewithal to deliver on-the-spot vigilante justice.

shiftwork2

Would love to be a Hose Patrol man driving around in a Hose Patrol van.  Great work for people who don't like other people, or plants.

holyzombiejesus

Quote from: shiftwork2 on July 17, 2018, 12:25:17 PM
Would love to be a Hose Patrol man driving around in a Hose Patrol van.  Great work for people who don't like other people, or plants.

You can still use a watering can even if there's a hosepipe ban in place.


New Jack

No, it's an infrastructural problem that shouldn't be solved by having the public turn on eachother


Neville Chamberlain

Quote from: New Jack on July 17, 2018, 12:47:47 PM
No, it's an infrastructural problem that shouldn't be solved by having the public turn on eachother

Yes, it is an infrastructural problem, but it's one that people can exacerbate by selflishly watering their geraniums while children die.

holyzombiejesus

Isn't it as much a selfish cunt/ ignorance problem as an infrastructural one?


Sebastian Cobb

Seriously I'd be more comfortable sneaking into their garden and cutting up their hose than grassing.

Neville Chamberlain

Deliberately using a hosepipe while a hosepipe ban is in place is the sort of thing I can imagine a gammony Brexiteer doing.


Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Neville Chamberlain on July 17, 2018, 01:20:38 PM
Deliberately using a hosepipe while a hosepipe ban is in place is the sort of thing I can imagine a gammony Brexiteer doing.

I PAY MY WATER BILL

What's worse are people who spend ages using a bucket to do the same thing. Properly following the law but disregarding the spirit.

Grass is pretty indestructible, it might look like straw when there's not much rain but it'll survive as long as you're not tipping engine oil on it.

Dr Rock

Just make the reservoirs deeper it's not rocket science.

buttgammon

Only out of spite. For example, my girlfriend's brother is an absolute cunt, and he'd recently ripped up their parents' garden for no apparent reason, so he was using the hosepipe a lot when the ban came in. I never actually saw him using it but I would've reported him if I saw him doing it.

Norton Canes

I would first attempt to ascertain whether the water supplier had imposed the ban because the water level was at a perilously close level, or simply with an eye on their profits/share value.

checkoutgirl

Quote from: bgmnts on July 17, 2018, 01:20:59 PM
I wish UK were a bit more like Germanyn

Well their economy is not to be sneezed at for sure.

Icehaven

Quote from: buttgammon on July 17, 2018, 01:43:33 PM
Only out of spite. For example, my girlfriend's brother is an absolute cunt, and he'd recently ripped up their parents' garden for no apparent reason, so he was using the hosepipe a lot when the ban came in. I never actually saw him using it but I would've reported him if I saw him doing it.

Yeah I can see variations on that happening plenty. Cue headlines ''NEIGHBOUR CHARGED AFTER HOSEPIPE BAN ROW STABBING''

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: holyzombiejesus on July 17, 2018, 12:32:46 PM
You can still use a watering can even if there's a hosepipe ban in place.

The other day I watered the garden with a watering can (there's not a ban as far as I know, but I didn't have a hose...actually I didn't bother searching, but the watering can was right there).  The neighbour was watering his with a hose.  It took quite a few watering cans full of water to do the whole lawn as the watering can empties quite quickly, then I did the flower beds etc.  Afterwards the lawn was quite soggy in parts, I think maybe I overdid it.  But the neighbour did his lawn a lot quicker than me and I calculated that I used a lot more water than he did, despite the fact that he'd have been the one getting whacked with a rubber hose if there was such a thing as Lawn Patrol.


Replies From View

I would put a dog poo down the end of their hose and let fate befall them.  If turning on their hose then "liberates" the dog poo around their garden then it is their own fault for using a hose in summer.  They should have realised it would happen.

Pijlstaart

You can waste water inside too, like in the shape of water they keep a monster in a bath and they fill up the room with water to have sex with it. Water wastage. Lived with a sri lankan guy who didn't know taps could be turned off, very very expensive, and if it wasn't going back down the drain, if it was going on the floor so he could have sex with a monster, I would have been livid. Think mother would ignore a hosepipe ban.

Replies From View

A lot of British people who have never even heard of hosepipes before, let alone used them, become so incensed by the notion of a hosepipe ban that they instantly search Wikipedia and amazon for hosepipes just so they can exercise the process of not being told what to do.

Fact!!

Icehaven

Quote from: Replies From View on July 17, 2018, 05:39:50 PM
A lot of British people who have never even heard of hosepipes before, let alone used them, become so incensed by the notion of a hosepipe ban that they instantly search Wikipedia and amazon for hosepipes just so they can exercise the process of not being told what to do.

Fact!!

I can also imagine a real-life variation on this in which hosepipe use rockets in the weeks before the ban kicks in, and the sudden spikes in demand causing even more shortages than there already were.

Zetetic

Yes, particularly if it was someone in the North West using my fathers' water.

biggytitbo

I would, but only if they brought back the death penalty for it.