Films that had potential but fell short

[Clownbaby]

Mama just fell short of the mark for me but there were some moments that were really quite emotional. The end result of the Mama ghost was also nowhere near as unsettling as this beautiful test shot:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ins7QwvAp28

Actual person with Marfan Syndrome, no CGI needed, but they went with the CGI instead.

The Rocky Horror same-universe sort of sequel Shock Treatment doesn't get mentioned much because it's a bit crap. Probably wouldn't have been if they'd managed to get the whole original cast together but that didn't happen, so even though there was a Brad and a Janet, because they were different actors, it didn't feel related at all. Tim Curry was meant to be a character as well and he wasn't. Again, just felt like another thing with no anchor or story. Songs were shite as well, bar maybe two.

[Avril Lavigne]

Paul, the alien-based comedy from 2011.  A sci-fi road-trip comedy buddy movie written by & starring Simon Pegg & Nick Frost with Kristen Wiig, Jason Bateman, Jeffrey Tambor and Sigourney Weaver sounds great on paper to me, but I don't remember any of the story or jokes at all & have never felt the need to go back and rewatch it or recommend it to anyone.

Blair Witch, 2016.  I love the original and was really excited for a proper follow-up adding a new story to that universe, but nearly every single thing about it was antithetical to what made the first film work so well.  I'd even go as far as to say that Book of Shadows is better because at least that's a laughably ridiculous mess that doesn't toy with the canon of the original & could practically be a completely unrelated (but entertainingly awful) movie.

Downsizing, 2017.  Great concept, great cast, but completely tedious, meandering and irritating from around the midway point on.

[Clownbaby]

^ Paul and World's End for me. World's End is more memorable but I feel like it needed some fat trimmed cause it drags in places . I'm the exact same with Paul. I watched it once, thought it was alright, forgot about it the next day. Even forgot who was in it. I don't even remember Jeffrey Tambor and Jason Bateman being in it and I like them both

[Avril Lavigne]

^ Paul and World's End for me. World's End is more memorable but I feel like it needed some fat trimmed cause it drags in places . I'm the exact same with Paul. I watched it once, thought it was alright, forgot about it the next day. Even forgot who was in it. I don't even remember Jeffrey Tambor and Jason Bateman being in it and I like them both

I really love all of the non-Sci-Fi stuff in World's End.  It's not a bad film by any means but I think if it was purely about the character comedy/pathos without any of the sci-fi/action side of things it would be an all time favourite of mine.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Ghost Stories fell in to this category for me, I liked the first segment with Paul Whitehouse a lot but the other two are a tad disappointing, whilst the ending is fucking rubbish.

The Quiet Place is another, it starts off well (I enjoy any film which involves a small child being eaten by aliens) but the final third is by the numbers stuff, and the birth bit is ridiculously silly.

And finally High Rise - I really enjoyed the first fifty minutes but the second half of the movie is deeply flawed, with ropey dialogue and a very unsatisfying conclusion.

[Shit Good Nose]

And finally High Rise - I really enjoyed the first fifty minutes but the second half of the movie is deeply flawed, with ropey dialogue and a very unsatisfying conclusion.

I'm the only person I know that likes the whole film (I also think it's one of Wheatley's best), BUT I am also the only person I know (that has seen the film) that has never read the book.


I've long said that somewhere in Nightbreed there's a brilliant film trying to get out.  Fuck knows where and how though - even the alternative cuts that have been released since are still wanting.

Also Up In Smoke takes a massive nosedive after that amazing first twenty minutes.  It's still quite good, but it would be a masterpiece if they kept up the quality of that first act.

Stripes is another one - one half brilliant hopeless soldiers in training comedy, one half dull never-ending rescue adventure.

[Bazooka]

Alien vs Predator.

[St_Eddie]

The Thing (2011).  It was never going to be a great film, like John Carpenter's classic but it was almost worthy in its use of practical effects, until the studio decided to cover it all up with CGI.  *Sigh*.

Blair Witch, 2016.  I love the original and was really excited for a proper follow-up adding a new story to that universe, but nearly every single thing about it was antithetical to what made the first film work so well.  I'd even go as far as to say that Book of Shadows is better because at least that's a laughably ridiculous mess that doesn't toy with the canon of the original & could practically be a completely unrelated (but entertainingly awful) movie.

I really love all of the non-Sci-Fi stuff in World's End.  It's not a bad film by any means but I think if it was purely about the character comedy/pathos without any of the sci-fi/action side of things it would be an all time favourite of mine.

Upon this day, many a great truth was spoken.

I'm the only person I know that likes the whole film (I also think it's one of Wheatley's best), BUT I am also the only person I know (that has seen the film) that has never read the book.

I thought that it was pants.  Beautiful pants but pants all the same and I've never read the book.

[Avril Lavigne]

The Thing (2011).  It was never going to be a great film, like John Carpenter's classic but it was almost worthy in its use of practical effects, until the studio decided to cover it all up with CGI.  *Sigh*.

Good call, I couldn't believe it when I read articles during production that reported on how the all practical effects were going to be "enhanced" with CGI, after the folks working on the movie had made such a big deal in the press about the return to latex & squibs.  What a colossal waste of the practical FX team's time & effort.  Try telling that to the girl I know who prefers the sequel to the original though...

[St_Eddie]

Good call, I couldn't believe it when I read articles during production that reported on how the all practical effects were going to be "enhanced" with CGI, after the folks working on the movie had made such a big deal in the press about the return to latex & squibs.  What a colossal waste of the practical FX team's time & effort.

I remember watching an interview with the director, shortly before the movie came out.  If I remember rightly, he was on the red carpet for the premiere of a different film of his (The Thing was in post-production for quite some time, I believe) and he was happily chatting away about this new film of his, with a big smile on his face and then the interviewer asked him about The Thing and immediately the smile dropped from his face and the colour drained from his cheeks.

The question which was asked of him was "so, The Thing prequel; how's that coming along and will it be mostly practical effects like the original?".  The director seemed very cagey and political with his answer; "uuhhh, yeah.  It's coming along in the edit.  There will be practical effects but we... uh, we need to sort of see what works and what... um, needs to be enhanced with CGI, you know?".  Basically just towing the corporate line.

I knew right there and then that the prequel was fucked.  The studio should have left him alone to realise his vision.  It was only a moderately budgeted movie, after-all.

Try telling that to the girl I know who prefers the sequel to the original though...

Not to be pedantic but it's actually a prequel, not a sequel (okay, that actually was quite pedantic).  Also, please tell that girl that she's somewhat of a dolt and possesses dubious critical faculties.

[Schnapple]

I always thought The Purge was a solid premise with a weak execution. Saying that, I understand the recent installments have fulfilled more of it's potential as a thriller and a satire.

[Clownbaby]

Anyone seen The Forest? Absolutely dire. The subject matter, about a real life suicide forest, could have been very emotionally affecting and incredibly upsetting and scary but it was a complete and utter abortion of a concept. And Natalie Dormer smirking involuntarily and being wooden and ice cold was a really bad casting choice. They always make the main character in recent horror films totally empty so it feels like nothing is at stake and I never feel anxious or protective of the vulnerable main character entering a dangerous place. Didn't give a shit about her.

Also there's a hilariously bad film called Carnival of Fear which was set in a real abandoned amusement park. That's a very obviously eerie setting and with really good cinematography you could make a great atmosphere, but I'm pretty sure it was directed by a sixth form special effects student or something because it is one of the ugliest and disappointing films I've ever seen. Should go in the ugly films thread as well.

[Avril Lavigne]

Not to be pedantic but it's actually a prequel, not a sequel (okay, that actually was quite pedantic).  Also, please tell that girl that she's somewhat of a dolt and possesses dubious critical faculties.

Ah of course, I knew that but I've been drinking since 5, when I said sequel what I really meant to say was follow-up. :)

As far as my friend's dubious critical faculties, she's quite proud of the fact that she won't watch anything released from before she was 10, which was 2001, because she "doesn't like bad B-movies that don't look real" e.g. (in her words) Back to the Future or Ghostbusters (another franchise of which she prefers the most recent iteration).

[Paaaaul]

Its neither a sequel, nor a prequel. It's a remake.

[Shit Good Nose]

Its neither a sequel, nor a prequel. It's a remake.

You could argue it's all three.

But it's mostly a prequel.

[St_Eddie]

As far as my friend's dubious critical faculties, she's quite proud of the fact that she won't watch anything released from before she was 10, which was 2001, because she "doesn't like bad B-movies that don't look real" e.g. (in her words) Back to the Future or Ghostbusters (another franchise of which she prefers the most recent iteration).

Blood boiling, vein in head throbbing.  Must. Calm. Down.

*takes happy pills*

...Nope.  Still fuming.

Its neither a sequel, nor a prequel. It's a remake.

It could definitely be classed as a remake, masquerading as a prequel, if one wanted to be critical but technically, it's most definitely a prequel.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

The Mission Impossible films. Sure, we all love the iconic stunts, but imagine how much better the films would be if you could remember absolutely anything else about them.

As far as my friend's dubious critical faculties, she's quite proud of the fact that she won't watch anything released from before she was 10, which was 2001, because she "doesn't like bad B-movies that don't look real" e.g. (in her words) Back to the Future or Ghostbusters (another franchise of which she prefers the most recent iteration).

Destroy her.

[Avril Lavigne]

Its neither a sequel, nor a prequel. It's a remake.

I know what you're saying but it is canonically a prequel.  Whether you give a flip about canon or not is entirely up to you but the events depicted are meant to precede those of the original & tie directly into it through setting up various elements.  A pure remake wouldn't need to bother with any of that and could arguably be better by virtue of doing its own thing (ha) in the same way that the 1982 version differed from the 1951 adaptation.  Kind of like the X-Files episode 'Ice' which was a Thing remake on a '90s TV budget.

[purlieu]

Blair Witch, 2016.  I love the original and was really excited for a proper follow-up adding a new story to that universe, but nearly every single thing about it was antithetical to what made the first film work so well.  I'd even go as far as to say that Book of Shadows is better because at least that's a laughably ridiculous mess that doesn't toy with the canon of the original & could practically be a completely unrelated (but entertainingly awful) movie.

The thing with Blair Witch is there are actually elements of it I think are really good, where they've expanded on stuff hinted at in the original the whole time distortion thing I think works - especially when they find the others who've been wandering for days - and is the strongest part of the film but they just framed it with a really, really, really sub-par found footage film that it was impossible to enjoy those elements because the rest of it just feels like a parody of the original.
I still wish the original writers could go and make the series of films they wanted to, exploring the whole mythology over various timeframes and from different perspectives.

Elysium. Big budget sci-fi by Neill Blomkamp with social commentary on immigration, racism and exploitation of the poor. Ends up being a 'generic handsome white dude punches his way to the rescue' action film.

[St_Eddie]

I still wish the original writers could go and make the series of films they wanted to, exploring the whole mythology over various timeframes and from different perspectives.

It's so frustrating that they were never given the opportunity to do so.  The financial failure of Blair Witch was presumably the final nail in the coffin of this ever happening.  There was briefly talk of a Blair Witch TV series but the lack of any news on that front suggests that it's been axed.

Elysium. Big budget sci-fi by Neill Blomkamp with social commentary on immigration, racism and exploitation of the poor.

It was great to see Blomkamp branch out and do something entirely different to District 9.

[Avril Lavigne]

Destroy her.

As a musician I've probably been more affected by the fact that she also actively dislikes music, as a whole, and seems quite proud of the fact that she doesn't like any bands or singers at all, but I can't destroy her because she's shacked up with a friend I've known since High School so I just have to smile and nod & say nothing about any of my interests every time I see them, probably forever.

they just framed it with a really, really, really sub-par found footage film that it was impossible to enjoy those elements because the rest of it just feels like a parody of the original.
I still wish the original writers could go and make the series of films they wanted to, exploring the whole mythology over various timeframes and from different perspectives.

Absolutely, I really enjoyed some of the ideas they brought to the table but as you say it just didn't feel genuine at any point & a lot of the time could have passed for any of the hundreds of Blair Witch parodies we've been gifted over the years.  As for the films the original directors had planned, I think the videogames covered a lot of that ground and although they weren't technically great I'd be very interested to play them just to see what they did with the mythology in other time periods.

There's also a series of Young Adult books but I correctly presume they're shit.

[Shit Good Nose]

It was great to see Blomkamp branch out and do something entirely different to District 9.

And Short Circuit 2.

[Clownbaby]

Mannequin could have almost been one of those campy shit-but-good films like Earth Girls Are Easy or something, but it was just shit. Apart from little James Spader who can do no wrong in my eyes

[Shit Good Nose]

Mannequin could have almost been one of those campy shit-but-good films like Earth Girls Are Easy or something, but it was just shit. Apart from little James Spader who can do no wrong in my eyes

My dad always loved both Mannequin films because Hollywood killed him every time he saw them.  Never got it myself.  But then he also loved Last of the Summer Wine.

Course, James Spader's transmogrification into J.T. Walsh is nearly complete now.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

she also actively dislikes music, as a whole, and seems quite proud of the fact that she doesn't like any bands or singers at all, but I can't destroy her because she's shacked up with a friend I've known since High School

Jesus wept! Has she got some dynamite fanny on her, or something?

[Clownbaby]

My dad always loved both Mannequin films because Hollywood killed him every time he saw them.  Never got it myself.  But then he also loved Last of the Summer Wine.

Course, James Spader's transmogrification into J.T. Walsh is nearly complete now.

Is it weird that even though James Spader is proper tubby and bald now I still think he's cute as a button

[Avril Lavigne]

Jesus wept! Has she got some dynamite fanny on her, or something?

If I'm being brutally honest (why stop when I'm 11 drinks deep) the guy she's with is generally regarded in our friend group as being like a less self-aware Karl Pilkington.  He rated 'Ratatouille' 1 star out of 5 for being too stressful.  A man who, via Rotten Tomatoes, rated Scary Movie 4/5, Wayans Bros fake-child comedy Little Man and the Adam Sandler movie Little Nicky 4.5/5, Bee Movie & White Chicks 3.5/5, Taxi Driver 2.5/5, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Rain Man, Ferris Bueller & Jackie Brown 2/5,  Zodiac, Scream & Jaws 1/5.  No surprise that he permanently banned me from his house  because of our clash of personalities until other friends protested his bloody-minded insistence that I should be kept away & ignored at all costs.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Destroy them both.

[Avril Lavigne]

Destroy them both.

No doubt there'll be a wedding before the year is out and my black market cyanide will finally prove its worth in the trifle.

[St_Eddie]

If I'm being brutally honest (why stop when I'm 11 drinks deep) the guy she's with is generally regarded in our friend group as being like a less self-aware Karl Pilkington.  He rated 'Ratatouille' 1 star out of 5 for being too stressful.  A man who, via Rotten Tomatoes, rated Scary Movie 4/5, Wayans Bros fake-child comedy Little Man and the Adam Sandler movie Little Nicky 4.5/5, Bee Movie & White Chicks 3.5/5, Taxi Driver 2.5/5, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Rain Man, Ferris Bueller & Jackie Brown 2/5,  Zodiac, Scream & Jaws 1/5.

To be fair, he's not wrong with his assessment of Ferris Bueller's Day Off, which goes someway to proving the old adage of even a broken clock being right twice a day, I suppose.

No surprise that he permanently banned me from his house  because of our clash of personalities until other friends protested his bloody-minded insistence that I should be kept away & ignored at all costs.

Bloody cheek!  I would have told him where to stick his lifted perma-ban!