The Euphoria of Curry Night

[holyzombiejesus]

I had to go on a team building thing today. It was as vile as it sounds. I may have overcompensated on the treats though: 2 pints in the pub before getting the train home, 6 new lps, a bottle of wine for tonight and, ta-da!, some nikwax for my coat.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Definitely, we only went there cos it was cheap and we were cheap. I am just unable to stop eating food if it's not costing me any more.

The first time I went to one of those Cosmo buffets I ended up being sick through eating loads of starters. Felt better after a I'd been bilious for about an hour. Good times.

[Pingers]

^ That's weirdly impressive, although I'm not sure I understand why

[mothman]

I did once go to a Chinese buffet - I think it still exists, the Real China in Cheltenham - where I ate more starters than should be humanly possible.

[Replies From View]

CURRY IS NOT A THING YOU CAN LIKE.  STOP PRETENDING OTHERWISE.

[mothman]

Oh, here we go. All rise, the case of Replies v Curry is now in session, Judge Caberton T. Verbwhore presiding.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Just had Friday had curry

Dhal
Paneer with sticky sauce
Pilau
Kale + onion bhajis

Yes

[Emma Raducanu]

I'd love a good lamb curry now.a lovely lamb curry with like a pilaf rice and lime chutney. And some poppadoms, some pakoras, some lovely fluffy naan bread and a hand job while I wash it all down with some cold lager, in front of coronation Street and the promise of a pot of chocolate mousse for dessert.

[Replies From View]

Oh, here we go. All rise, the case of Replies v Curry is now in session, Judge Caberton T. Verbwhore presiding.

HELLO YES, THANK YOU FOR INVITING ME ALONG TO THIS.

CURRY HAS A HORRIBLE HOT SENSATION UPON THE INSIDES THAT IS UNPLEASANT, AND IT BURNS YOU AND WATER DOESN'T MAKE IT GO AWAY.

[mothman]

And with those words, the notion of Brexit was born.

[Replies From View]

AND WHAT ELSE.  DO I GET A STICKER?

[mothman]

No. Csse dansakhed. I mean, dismissed.

[Replies From View]

I WAS PROMISED A STICKER.

[Replies From View]

Listen - if curry was any good then other people would like it, but they don't.

[imitationleather]

This thread is making me sorely tempted to make the call.

I quite fancy a Saturday of shitting molten lava.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

CURRY HAS A HORRIBLE HOT SENSATION UPON THE INSIDES THAT IS UNPLEASANT, AND IT BURNS YOU AND WATER DOESN'T MAKE IT GO AWAY.

This is true.

If you're a massive wimp!

[The Boston Crab]

Had to sack someone today for gross misconduct. Gonna have a hake curry now to 'hake' myself feel better. I hope it tastes 'rice'.

[canadagoose]

I really fancy some lime pickle now. Shame you can't just get it on its own, or maybe with a few poppadoms. Or maybe you can, if you order enough of it?

[SpiderChrist]

CURRY IS NOT A THING YOU CAN LIKE.  STOP PRETENDING OTHERWISE.

Oh.

Bum.

I've got a cottage pie in the fridge, shall I bung it in the microwave?

[Cuellar]

Curries are good, but ONLY the ones with no spice whatsoever.

A passanda, or korma.

[Kane Jones]

Shit off. Spice is best. You spice haters should just go home and eat your chips and chicky nug-nugs with red sauce.

[mothman]

Yes, but MAKE SURE you haven't got spicy ketchup by accident. The labels are so similar, and you'll do yourself a discombobulation.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Had a gobi manchurian and some paneer dish washed down with kingfisher. Yes I.

[Cuellar]

Shit off. Spice is best. You spice haters should just go home and eat your chips and chicky nug-nugs with red sauce.

Oooooh yes please!

[canadagoose]

Any other South Indian Garlic Chilli fans around? It's got to be the best dish you can get at a British Indian restaurant.

[Replies From View]

One thing I have noticed is that men who are trying to give off a vibe of enjoying curry (they're not of course) are fantasising about women loving them for being sweaty and struggling.  "My man can't do a jot of heavy-lifting," they imagine a lady saying in private to her ladyfriends, "but he looks a bit like it when every pore in his body is rejecting some stupidly over-spicy food."

[Sebastian Cobb]

I really fancy some lime pickle now. Shame you can't just get it on its own, or maybe with a few poppadoms. Or maybe you can, if you order enough of it?

Pataks (amongst others) make jars of it.

[Bazooka]

One thing I have noticed is that men who are trying to give off a vibe of enjoying curry (they're not of course) are fantasising about women loving them for being sweaty and struggling.  "My man can't do a jot of heavy-lifting," they imagine a lady saying in private to her ladyfriends, "but he looks a bit like it when every pore in his body is rejecting some stupidly over-spicy food."

I eat ridiculously spicy food to impress myself, to impress women I knock out the hardest looking lad in the vicinity.

[Kane Jones]

One thing I have noticed is that men who are trying to give off a vibe of enjoying curry (they're not of course) are fantasising about women loving them for being sweaty and struggling.  "My man can't do a jot of heavy-lifting," they imagine a lady saying in private to her ladyfriends, "but he looks a bit like it when every pore in his body is rejecting some stupidly over-spicy food."

How are your chicky nug-nugs and ketchup mate? Keep dipping!

[Replies From View]

I eat ridiculously spicy food to impress myself, to impress women I knock out the hardest looking lad in the vicinity.

Is this a euphemism for doing massive shits?