The “This’ll be shit, I reckon” thread

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

haha fucking stupid Marc Maron's in it. "STAMPS DAAHT CAAAHM DAVID! WHO WERE YOUR GUYS COMIN' UP? D'YOU EVER AUDITION FOR SNL, DAVID? COS I DID. BOOMER LIVES on mars"

I look forward to Maron going on and on and on about what a dumb movie this is and, hey guys, what can I say, I'm not proud of the work, but sometimes you gotta take a chance, y'know, and this time I messed up, but everyone involved in the project was real nice, I had a good time doing it, and it's encouraged me to reflect, y'know, to think about my life, my career, where it's at, where it's going, so I see it as a positive stage in my journey.

And he will bring it up every single time he interviews an actor from now on.

[Jerzy Bondov]

Love the wrong lightning bolt when the Spiders are playing the gig at the end. Probably not called the Spiders in this mind, probably called Wiggly Starburst and the Space Insectz

[jobotic]

You're not a space alien, you're from Bromley, man!

Love the wrong lightning bolt when the Spiders are playing the gig at the end. Probably not called the Spiders in this mind, probably called Wiggly Starburst and the Space Insectz

I'm going to refer to this film as Opal Fruitz

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

I can't wait to hear the 'Bowie-style' music they've knocked up for this.

[Icehaven]

The average bloke in the street could do a better Bowie impression than the actor playing him.

[McChesney Duntz]

But, accurate teeth, so there's that.

[kalowski]

I hope there's a bit where a couple of promoters say, '"This guy ain't ever gonna make it in this town! Am I right, Mr Ziggy?" "Indeed you are, Mr Stardust. Promoting his records ain't nothing but Rock n Roll suicide!"

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

It will include a scene of sailors fighting on a dancefloor, immediately prior to which a man called John will take umbrage at Bowie dancing with someone else. At one point there will be a cute domestic scene where Angie describes herself and Zavid as "a couple of kooks".

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

The average bloke in the street could do a better Bowie impression than the actor playing him.

Johnny Flynn, who wrote all the lovely music for Detectorists. Oh dear.

[Ferris]

Johnny Flynn, who wrote all the lovely music for Detectorists. Oh dear.

I knew I recognized the name from somewhere. Oh dear.

If someone calls you up and asks you to play Bowie (!) and Maron's in it (!) it is hard to say no if you don't have a lot of acting experience and want to break into all that.

Edit: Johnny Flynn being a nice chap https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=h8oBJSArU_0

[BritishHobo]

Yeah Johnny Flynn is really lovely, so I hope the disdain for this film doesn't hit him or his career too hard - even though it is definitely exactly the kind of film where a bewildered music producer will go 'it's a load of rubbish, you'd have more chance finding life on bloody Mars than being a successful musician! What? I said life on Mars!!!'

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

Yeah Johnny Flynn is really lovely, so I hope the disdain for this film doesn't hit him or his career too hard - even though it is definitely exactly the kind of film where a bewildered music producer will go 'it's a load of rubbish, you'd have more chance finding life on bloody Mars than being a successful musician! What? I said life on Mars!!!'

I'm sure he'll be fine. He's made a bit of a twit of himself here, but the film will swiftly be forgotten.

[kalowski]

"This Bowie chap couldn't write a decent song if he took five years!"

[phantom_power]

Why have they made him so posh? Bowie was far from posh. And why have they made his nose look so prominent? Flynn doesn't have that big a nose, and neither did Bowie

[Jerzy Bondov]

Hey here comes that that Boowie guy. Hello Spaceboy!!

[Jerzy Bondov]

Hello lads, it's me, David Bowie. It's 1971 and I've written a lovely little song for you blokes. It's called Baby Grace (A Horrid Cassette) (segue)

[frajer]

Genuinely, horribly fascinated to see how they get around the song performances.

He takes a deep breath and leans into the microphone and then they smash cut to the dressing room with manager ecstatically declaring, "That was sensational!!" ?

[AsparagusTrevor]

David: "Hello, I'm David Jones"
Record Producer: "A boring name like David Jones won't sell records! Why don't we call you, David..." looks around the room, sees a large knife "...Bowie"
Cut to musical montage, set to the song 'Astral Bloke'

[frajer]

David Bowie: "Hi everyone, I've got a new song about space."
Crowd: "Woohoo!"
David Bowie: "Would you like to hear it?"
Crowd: "No need!"
David Bowie: "T'rific."

[Ferris]

I hope there's a bit where a couple of promoters say, '"This guy ain't ever gonna make it in this town! Am I right, Mr Ziggy?" "Indeed you are, Mr Stardust. Promoting his records ain't nothing but Rock n Roll suicide!"

All this stuff was satirized perfectly 12 (!) years ago in Walk Hard: the Dewey Cox Story. Surely no producer is hack enough to try all that again.

[Icehaven]

The Very First Thing You Need To Do When Planning A Music Biopic
Will you be able use the artist's music in the film? Y/N
If Y - Proceed
If N - That's the end of that. 


Unless I'm being unduly harsh. Has there ever been an even half decent music biopic made without any of the original music? Not shitty TV movies, something actually watchable. 

[Ferris]

The Very First Thing You Need To Do When Planning A Music Biopic
Will you be able use the artist's music in the film? Y/N
If Y - Proceed
If N - That's the end of that. 


Unless I'm being unduly harsh. Has there ever been an even half decent music biopic made without any of the original music? Not shitty TV movies, something actually watchable.

The Todd Haynes/Bob Dylan one from a few years back used all covers and reworked versions?

...I'm stretching here.

[Dex Sawash]

I don't think this thread is substantial enough to contain this film.

[El Unicornio, mang]

They can't use his music? Ha

Surely they could just get someone to do soundalike covers though?

[frajer]

Surely they could just get someone to do soundalike covers though?

Not based on the sterile trailer, which seems to be about a parallel universe David Jones who decides to take the stage as a glamorous mime.

[jobotic]

Surely they could just get someone to do soundalike covers though?

Dunno, I assumed it meant not. I got it off a YouTube comment. Probably Fake news and the film will be brilliant.

[El Unicornio, mang]

Actually, just remembered this Jimi Hendrix film from 2013 that didn't feature any of his music

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimi:_All_Is_by_My_Side

The film does not include any songs written by Hendrix, as the filmmakers' request to use them was denied by Experience Hendrix LLC (Hendrix's estate)

Anyone can release covers of songs without permission, so I always assumed the same would be true of putting them in movies. Unless it's just a thing done "out of respect for the estate".

[Small Man Big Horse]

The NME reviewed this back in April, but oddly enough didn't mention how poor Johnny Flynn's attempt at the voice is: https://www.nme.com/reviews/film-reviews/stardust-review-david-bowie-biopic-delves-deep-into-the-genesis-of-an-icon-2652346

[Blumf]

Made a thread, 'cause it needs it:
https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,83357.0.html

[olliebean]

Actually, just remembered this Jimi Hendrix film from 2013 that didn't feature any of his music

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimi:_All_Is_by_My_Side

Anyone can release covers of songs without permission, so I always assumed the same would be true of putting them in movies. Unless it's just a thing done "out of respect for the estate".

Different rights. A compulsory license (the one which allows a cover to be released without explicit permission) only covers "mechanical" rights; to release an audio-visual presentation using a song requires a "synchronisation" license, which must be negotiated with the rights holder and can't be compulsorily obtained.