The “This’ll be shit, I reckon” thread

[St_Eddie]

More to the point, do they not think generation Z are capable of turning their iPhones sideways to watch a landscape format video?

To be fair, judging by the number of YouTube videos shot and uploaded by them, they are not.

[rjd2]

Louise Linton new film...who you say?


Its looks very empowering.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TBBE3FyHlI&feature=emb_logo

[BritishHobo]

I like that the third act seems to be made up entirely of her pointing different weapons at him while he goes 'cor blimey, that are you gonna do with that?!'

[Povidone]

Ok had to look her up (fnarr, wurble etc)... playing herself in this by the looks of things?

"Look dear I've made some more money! Why don't you go and make a film with some of it"

Louise Linton is a Scottish actress

Really? It would explain the bizarre array of accents on display in that trailer.

[Bad Ambassador]

A vanity project by someone who thought Patrick Bateman was supposed to be a hero. Also really liked how all the captions come from an online meme generator.

[Dex Sawash]

LAND

Starring Robin Wright. Directed by Robin Wright.
From acclaimed actress Robin Wright comes her directorial debut LAND, the poignant story of one woman's search for meaning in the vast and harsh American wilderness. Edee (Wright), in the aftermath of an unfathomable event, finds herself unable to stay connected to the world she once knew and in the face of that uncertainty, retreats to the magnificent, but unforgiving, wilds of the Rockies. After a local hunter (Demián Bichir) brings her back from the brink of death, she must find a way to live again.

[Icehaven]

LAND

Starring Robin Wright. Directed by Robin Wright.
From acclaimed actress Robin Wright comes her directorial debut LAND, the poignant story of one woman's search for meaning in the vast and harsh American wilderness. Edee (Wright), in the aftermath of an unfathomable event, finds herself unable to stay connected to the world she once knew and in the face of that uncertainty, retreats to the magnificent, but unforgiving, wilds of the Rockies. After a local hunter (Demián Bichir) brings her back from the brink of death, she must find a way to live again.

And I bet you don't find out what the 'unfathomable event' is until the 3rd act, and it'll almost definitely be a dead child/husband/entire family.

[dissolute ocelot]

LAND

Starring Robin Wright. Directed by Robin Wright.
From acclaimed actress Robin Wright

Let me rewrite your tagline "From the star of Forrest Gump! A life-affirming movie about a woman who didn't know when to stop!"

[The Culture Bunker]

And I bet you don't find out what the 'unfathomable event' is until the 3rd act, and it'll almost definitely be a dead child/husband/entire family.

In a twist nobody saw coming, it turns out she killed them all and is in the wilderness because she's hiding out from the authorities.

At the end, she also murders the hunter chap (with his own gun or bow and arrow) when he finally susses her out. 

[Rizla]

Louise Linton new film...who you say?

She's the 'skinny white Muzungu with long angel hair'.

[batwings]

New from M. Night Shyamalan:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB1m-WogYeg&feature=emb_title

[Custard]

Do you think M Night cries himself to sleep some nights? He was being touted as the new Hitchcock 20 years ago, now he's barely the old Jordan Peele

[dissolute ocelot]

New from M. Night Shyamalan:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB1m-WogYeg&feature=emb_title

Is this some sort of "what's America's biggest nightmare? Getting old!" thought process? Haven't they seen Benjamin Button, getting young is much scarier. Improbably rapid aging seems to be everywhere at the moment.

Do you think M Night cries himself to sleep some nights? He was being touted as the new Hitchcock 20 years ago, now he's barely the old Jordan Peele

It was funny when everyone quite liked Split and then he released a sequel called Glass spinning off a whole cinematic universe and everyone decided he was shit again.

[Phil_A]

It's kind of hilarious how anyone could instantly predict what the film is about based on the title, and then you watch the trailer and it is exactly what you would think it would be.

WHAT IF GOT OLD...BUT QUICK??

[Famous Mortimer]

And I bet you don't find out what the 'unfathomable event' is until the 3rd act, and it'll almost definitely be a dead child/husband/entire family.

I hope it's a weird bird-based apocalypse like in "The Falls".

[El Unicornio, mang]

New from M. Night Shyamalan:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB1m-WogYeg&feature=emb_title

Haha, genuinely looks like a comedy parody of an M. Night Shyamalan film

Also, this comment

The way the mom says "you were 6 y.o. this morning" like she's not really shocked but mildly irritated

[Bad Ambassador]

What if puberty, but too much?

[Cuellar]

When he said his shorts were tight I thought it was going to be about a kid with a massive plonker

[Gulftastic]

When he said his shorts were tight I thought it was going to be about a kid with a massive plonker

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzJw0_UzM-s

[Famous Mortimer]

When he said his shorts were tight I thought it was going to be about a kid with a massive plonker

I thought Gulftastic's video was going to be this.

[mothman]

When he said his shorts were tight I thought it was going to be about a kid with a massive plonker

... with a twist at the end of it. This is M. Night, after all.

[Dex Sawash]

... with a twist at the end of it. This is M. Night, after all.

Been missing seeing  those troopers march past

[dissolute ocelot]

Anti-Life, an Alien rip-off featuring Bruce Willis on a spaceship, seems to have crept near-silently towards whatever passes for a release these days. Cath Clarke in the Guardian certainly doesn't like it.

It would be nice if a good Bruce Willis film was still possible (I know some people liked Looper, 2012, but I wasn't too impressed by the idea that Joseph Gordon-Lewitt could play the young Bruce, or anything else that passed for an idea in the film; it was no better than Trancers and tbh worse than Timecop. Still seems a million times better than this one.)

[Hand Solo]

It would be nice if a good Bruce Willis film was still possible

12 Monkeys?

[St_Eddie]

12 Monkeys?

Ah, yes.  That recent Bruce Willis film from 1995.

[Hand Solo]

Ah, yes.  That recent Bruce Willis film from 1995.

In 2035, James Cole is a prisoner living in an underground compound beneath Philadelphia.

[Custard]

Surrogates from 2009 was quite good. But yeah, his recent CV is laughably bad

[mothman]

There really needs to be a "What the FUCK has Bruce Willis done to his career?" thread.

[El Unicornio, mang]

It's kind of awful, although tbf he's still doing better than probably 99% of actors (or the general public really, particularly in the current climate). It just looks bad compared to what he was doing 30 odd years ago.

[thecuriousorange]

He's still a likeable presence and it's not like he's gone Robert De Niro bad. He just quietly entered the "band that used to be good" stage of his career.