Harry Potter [split topic]

[bgmnts]

Was talking to a nice Norwegian girl earlier and we were getting along fine and we got onto the subject of Harry Potter and i mentioned how I dont really respect it as any serious literature, i find them more fun children's books.

Fuck me, she had a right strop and cut off all contact. Which is as hilarious as it is worrying about how this stupid piece of pop culture has infantilised the fuck out of people.

[BlodwynPig]

Was talking to a nice Norwegian girl earlier and we were getting along fine and we got onto the subject of Harry Potter and i mentioned how I dont really respect it as any serious literature, i find them more fun children's books.

Fuck me, she had a right strop and cut off all contact. Which is as hilarious as it is worrying about how this stupid piece of pop culture has infantilised the fuck out of people.

Find out more... in that potterization of modern life thread

[sevendaughters]

I used to go out with a Dutch girl, a serious academic, Cambridge Ph.D in a soft science, she adored Harry Potter. I'd never read or seen any of them. Nothing against them, I was just too old by the time they were doing the rounds. Anyway, she made me watch the first one and I said it was 'alright', with the word having a downward slope at the end to indicate 'alright meaning it wasn't a complete trainwreck'. Anyway she sulked about that and it started the ball rolling downhill fast. My not liking Remember Me (truly trite) and refusing to support the Dutch against Costa Rica in the last World Cup saw me actually dumped in a coffee shop in Warrington.

[BlodwynPig]

Odd. If you're into niche things I could understand getting upset but when a couple of billion people share your silly tastes in shit fantasy, one dissenting voice shouldn't fuck with your psyche

[spamwangler]

tried listening to the audiobook, but steven fry sounded like he was doing it whilst bathing in a vat of rice pudding, the smug bellend

[Nowhere Man]

He was probably smirking just thinking about all the royalties he was going to make from that little gig right there. The bastard.

One of my wife's sisters is 20 and whilst we were staying at her Parents house I swear the sister used to put on a Harry Potter film every other fucking day, it was bloody maddening.

And of course being a Brit in America everyone assumes I must fucking love and know everything about Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings and The fucking Royals.

[machotrouts]

I use "ejaculated" instead of said.

At least one Harry Potter book has a sincere use of "ejaculated" to mean "said". I remember this because as a child I had absolutely no idea "ejaculate" could mean anything other than "cum", and honestly thought a rogue editor had snuck it into the manuscript as an act of vandalism. I was not at all prepared for Horace Slughorn ejaculating all over the shop.

I hope this reply was worth waiting 5 years for

[Steven]

Emma, Chapter 12:
"Here was A DANGEROUS OPENING.
"Ah!" said Mr. Woodhouse, SHAKING HIS HEAD and FIXING HIS EYES on her with TENDER concern.—The EJACULATION IN EMMA's ear expressed, "Ah! there is no END of the sad consequences of your going to SOUTH END. It DOES NOT BEAR talking of." And for a little while she hoped he would not talk of it, and that a silent rumination might suffice to restore him to the RELISH of HIS OWN SMOOTH GRUEL. "

[kittens]

yes, i remember reading war of the worlds as a boy and it had a bit about a priest running outside ejaculating. i assumed it was saying he'd been having a sneaky wank but was compelled to run outside to see the aliens or whatever and just came anyway.

[Spoon of Ploff]

Ah, that reminds me (somehow - I don't fucking know): Cerys (and anyone else in the same situation), if you're getting roped in to watching this and you really can't be bothered slogging through two and a half hours of magical wizard fun, stick Brad Neely's 'Wizard People, Dear Reader' on some headphones - it's a deranged 'book on tape' style narration track that's very stupid but also very fun. It's on YouTube with the film, but you can download it here as an audio track.

Cheers for this. Its a work of pure genius. From now on my new internal battle cry will be "I am important and... unavoidable!" spoken in the voice of someone who has sunk four or five cognacs.

[Son of Sod]

And of course being a Brit in America everyone assumes I must fucking love and know everything about Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings and The fucking Royals.

I was changing trains at Kings Cross St Pancras when a pair of Canadian girls walked up to me and asked if I'd read Harry Potter. Having lived through enough Ron Weasley comparisons in my time, I went with my gut reaction and said "No!" before sheepishly correcting myself and asking why they wanted to know. They asked if I knew where "Platform 9 3/4" was, so I told them it was inside the main station and that they should follow the signs there, thinking that would be that. But, then, I made the mistake of having a mad moment of complete honesty (probably because they were looking for something more specific and I was getting nervous). I told them I wasn't entirely sure and explained that I didn't know its exact location within the station, which is true in spite of the fact that I must have passed it plenty of times. Naturally and understandably, this didn't satisfy them at all. They exclaimed "Harry Potter's your country! Why don't you know where it is?!" and then walked off to bother a lady ahead of me. She got much the same treatment and, much to my delight, said she didn't know where it was either or that she had ever read the books, which they were again astounded by. "Why don't you Brits know about your country?!"

They seemed altogether friendly if a little spaced-out, and they were having a nice chat with the lady after the shock had passed (during which they said they were Canadian). But I did feel bad for her when they kept insisting that she read all the books and watch all the films despite her obvious lack of interest.

[Son of Sod]

For the record, I liked the books, and I give Rowling a lot of credit for creating a charming fictional world I could immerse myself in. It just never made that much of an impact on me, and I'm glad I've never had to meet the kind of person who'd fall out with me over it. I find that level of commitment to it disturbing, quite honestly, especially in people around my age (late 20s-early 30s).

[MojoJojo]

At least one Harry Potter book has a sincere use of "ejaculated" to mean "said". I remember this because as a child I had absolutely no idea "ejaculate" could mean anything other than "cum", and honestly thought a rogue editor had snuck it into the manuscript as an act of vandalism. I was not at all prepared for Horace Slughorn ejaculating all over the shop.

I hope this reply was worth waiting 5 years for

FUN FACT: In the Sherlock Holmes stories, the word "ejaculated" is used more than "elementary".

[Kelvin]

"Ejaculate, my dear Watson."

[Steven]

"Ejaculate, my dear Watson."

First phone call was a dirty one by old Alexander Graham Bell: "Mr. Watson. Come Here. I need you."

[thraxx]

It's all pure J'lobery apart from the bits when Daniel Radcliffe does that 'ooh err!' big swallow and bulge his eyes from side things when Harry is afraid.

My bairn is obsessed by Harry Potter, sadly, so I have been reading the guff every night for the last 18 months.  The only book that is anywhere approaching enjoyable or good is the Azkhaban one.

[Norton Canes]

Top Indian law university introduces course based on Harry Potter

Fuck off to grave

[saltysnacks]

I think that they are good children's books. I adored them as a wean, and still liked them as a pre-adolescent. They aren't like Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Earthsea or Alan Garner's books though. They cannot really be enjoyed as an adult.

[Golden E. Pump]

Tried the first book and couldn't get into it. Watched the first movie and hated it. Everyone tells me I should start on book/film three or something and the very notion that entire books and films of a franchise that only has seven(?) entries in total relegate it to shit for me.

That being said, I'm acutely aware of the fact that almost every woman I meet that's a similar age absolutely loves the franchise. This means there will undoubtedly be a time in my life when I'm obliged to watch all the films out of duty to the whims of the flesh.

[nedthemumbler]

Although I have completely had enough of Mr Fry nowadays, I must confess the tapes of the books were an important emotional balm and sleep aid for about five years as a young ish teen. 

His narration seemed to hide the worst of the clanking prose and it was all just a warm bath of mild peril and smug security, if that's not too much of a contradiction.

The films are as casually fun to watch as anything that expensively made.  Not that I have for years mind, and even then not that deliberately.

[Mister Six]

Read the first four books. They're all good fun but the third is the only one that's properly good. The fourth needs a severe hacking down, and I couldn't be bothered after that because the editor clearly couldn't either

Seen all the films. The first two are shit, the third is splendid and the rest are perfectly fine.

You're welcome.

[Thomas]

The third is indeed the best - book and film. I don't cling to Harry Potter now in adulthood, and I never read the last book, but one story detail does bother me.

In the fourth book, Dumbledore allows Harry to compete in a deathly dangerous tournament, despite the fact that his very nomination is against the rules and entirely suspicious. At the end of the series, it's revealed that Dumbledore's main mission in life was to keep Harry alive long enough to defeat Voldemort.

Now, why would Dumbledore go ahead and let him compete in the Junior Tournament of Death, considering the absolutely vital long game? What would have happened if he'd refused? The organisers of the tournament would surely just have shrugged and gone, 'Fair enough, headmaster wizard with considerable clout. There has obviously been some mistake. We will not make this child compete.' What actually happens is a very tenuous hook for a very long book.

And that's all I can remember about the plot of Harry Potter.

[BlodwynPig]

Certainly seems like a plot hole.

When was the first Harry Potter book - seems like it should be mid 2000s, but probably earlier given that most of you were weans when it came out.

[AsparagusTrevor]

Dumbledore couldn't stop Harry from competing, once his name was drawn out it was like a magical contract thing or some-such.

TLDR: A wizard did it

[Jerzy Bondov]

Dumbledore couldn't stop Harry from competing, once his name was drawn out it was like a magical contract thing or some-such.

TLDR: A wizard did it

Yes I remember this and I hate Harry Potter.

Speaks volumes to me that the fifth book is the longest but was made into the shortest film. Everything from book 4 on badly needs a good chopping. Film 7 is boring as fuck as well.

[Thomas]

Dumbledore couldn't stop Harry from competing, once his name was drawn out it was like a magical contract thing or some-such.

TLDR: A wizard did it

I know that, but what happens if the magical contract is broken? What's the big deal? Will Harry be punished by death? Why would a teacher allow such a thing in his school? And this totally binding magical contract device couldn't tell that someone else had put Harry's name in the goblet? Dumbledore knows what's at stake, and that the most important boy in the world attends his school, and still he doesn't ensure a safety clause when the forced death tournament comes to town?

If someone secretly put Michael Ball's name in the goblet, for example, and it nominated him, would the Hogwarts Gestapo have no choice but to go and drag him in from the Muggle world and force him to fight a dragon?

Loada boll. 

[Chollis]

Certainly seems like a plot hole.

When was the first Harry Potter book - seems like it should be mid 2000s, but probably earlier given that most of you were weans when it came out.

1997

[Chollis]

I like Hazza P. Think it's quite an enchanting/comforting/lovely little world yer man JK's created there. I think I can get away with that because I was 10 when the first film came out and grew up with it. Can understand how anyone even slightly older can think of it as shit for cunts though. Also massively fancied Emma Watson so that helped.

[thraxx]

I am no coming to the end of an 18 month read through of all seven books as bed time reading with my daughter. Thank fuck.

It's true that the world is colourful and amazing, but it's stretched far too thin over 7 books. The only book that is any good is Azkaban. The later ones are dull as fuck and badly written, the characters horrible and she keeps writing herself into a corner and then pulling out a whole load of clanging deus  ex machina moments. It's three books of rip roaring read poured into 7 tomes of utter bollocks.

[MiddleRabbit]

I've taught reading to older kids who never really got it.  Not sounding out letters - phonics - so much as the skill of inference.

I don't believe that it necessarily makes much difference what you read, as long as you do.

However, Harry Potter books are useless for teaching inference skills because absolutely everything is made explicit.

So, no objection to anyone digging them any more than I object to people enjoying Enid Blyton but, as far as sending people on voyages of imagination or whatever crap they say, Harry Potter is a dead loss.

Philip Pulman's books are much harder to read though, in my experience, da kidz get a lot more out of reading them.