Has anyone watched a film on the dedicated Christmas film channel on Freeview? They're all unremittingly bad. Like a film churned out by a sixth former bad. Terrible camera work, rubbish acting and woeful storylines (like a businessman wanting to chop a nun's tree down).
I can take comfort in a Christmas film, even miracle on 34th Street or Mrs Claus but this channel offers nothing. Which is a shame.
My other half is addicted to it. The movies are awful. Rich, conceited fucks screw over other rich, conceited fucks and everything is resolved, usually via the presence of an elderly or a child or a dog or actual Santa, just in time for Christmas snogging.
I can get through them because the actors are fascinating. They've usually been cast because they have a passing resemblance to one or more more famous actors depending on the angle you view them from. Last weekend there was one on about a woman who wanted a specific tree she found in someone's front garden but the people wouldn't give her the tree because it was dead mum's tree but eventually everyone falls in love and they've pulled up dead mum's tree and sent it to fucking Boston or some shit.
Anyway, the important thing is that the woman looked like a hybrid of Reese Witherspoon, Julia Roberts and Blake Lively, whilst the main man one looked like David Boreanaz, Chris Jericho and Chris Evans. I think. Unless I'm confusing him with the one about the actor who moves in on some random woman's ranch over Christmas to learn how to ride a horse 'cos he's in a film about horses and knows so little about horses and is arrogant Hollywood man that he tries to feed one a cookie! I ask you!
