Your unlikeliest celebrity sightings

[Absorb the anus burn]

Barry Took eating crisps on St. Martin's Lane.

Tom Conti dumping a filthy mattress in Kentish Town dump.

Frank Carson running to catch a tram in Blackpool.

Kevin Spacey sucking on a fag (not a euphemism) outside The Old Vic.

[batwings]

Nicolas Parsons walking out of a car showroom near Swansea, early 90s (not him, the year).

1980s newsreader, Fiona Armstrong, clad in jeans and long leather boots, walking down Somerton high street sometime in the late 1990s.

[NoSleep]

George (Brian Murphy) from George & Mildred and Man About The House coming up to London (Victoria) on a train from Kent. Danny La Rue & poodle getting off a train from Kent at Victoria station. Prince Harry at Dundee station (I missed this one actually, completely ignored him as I headed for the platform and was informed later; he apparently had bodyguards. There was some delay before the train finally left the station). Danny Peacock & Chris Langham waiting for a train in snowbound Euston one night. Mark Thomas on a London bus on Clapham Common. Surely all these people have diamond encrusted Rolls Royces; what are they doing on public transport?

[Cuellar]

Kevin Spacey sucking on a fag (not a euphemism) outside The Old Vic.

WHAT ARE THE CHANCES

I'm kidding. But not really.

[Cuntbeaks]

Jon Pertwee in a Chinese restaurant in Derby.

[Phoenix Lazarus]

Film director Michael Winner, in my school hall in 1986.  He was on the panel of Radio Four show Any Questions, which used our school as a venue.

[Brundle-Fly]

Pamela Anderson in a bikini on a footbridge. She was filming a scene of VIP and me and my then GF wandered into shot by accident. She was a lot more petite than I imagined, very smiley and quite beautiful.

[Noonling]

At a CaB meet several years ago Justin Edwards and Alex Macqueen (Ben and Julius from The Thick of It) happened to be in the same pub. I think someone cornered Justin Edwards for a CaB radio interview which I always felt a bit bad about as I think it was the start of his stag do...

[Buelligan]

Malcolm Rifkind, John Redgrave and John Selwyn-Gummer in a lift but it wasn't that unlikely as I was nearing the epicentre of the Death Star on that day.

[Head Gardener]

Some other B list celebs that just missed being mentioned in my first anecdote, Barry Norman - served him a drink of red wine in a bar,
in the same bar I was working, Rat Scabies had a rum and Coke, I actually poured his Coke over the rum - incredible but true and to cap it off,
he didn't have any ice. Honourable mentions to other super stars I have served drinks and crisps to should go to the bloke with the silly
really stupid haircut in Flock Of Seagulls, snooker player Ray Reardon (all in black, like a vampire or maybe just on his way to a tournament)
Pete Burns (very tall) Alan 'Fluff' Freeman (asked me out, said no yer ok) and some on the C list I can't think of at the moment.

[Jockice]

Russell Grant in the canteen at my old workplace.

El Hadji Diouf in a traffic jam on the M62. At one point we were next to each other for about five minutes. I didn't tell him I was a Celtic fan though, otherwise he'd have spat at me.

Craig Charles on an otherwise deserted lane in Sheffield city centre. I was going one way, he was going the other. We sort of nodded to each other despite never having met before. A couple of years later I was in a suburban pub and he walked past where I was sitting on the way to the toilet. Bloody stalker.

Lord Falconer in Budapest. I was on a sightseeing trip and he was getting shown round the same historic building as me. But not as part of the group I was in.

And some others.

[PlanktonSideburns]

Mr miagi at brecon jazz festival

Followed him around for ages, couldnt  bring myself to say anything

[Jockice]

Mr miagi at brecon jazz festival

Followed him around for ages, couldnt  bring myself to say anything

The short-sighted cartoon character?

[Twed]

The short-sighted cartoon character?

"followed him all the way up a construction site and on to a girder being carried by a crane that fortuitously bridged a gap that would otherwise have been fatal. He just wouldn't get out of his car though"

[pancreas]

Did I mention about the time I sang a Queen song to Brian May twice?

[MoonDust]

MoonDust has been particularly egregious in his proposals. Amir Khan from Bolton, in Bolton? Dublin resident Louis Walsh, in Dublin? James Nesbitt in Manchester, filming Cold Feet, which is famously filmed in Manchester? Buck up your game, sunshine.

Well I've seen a few American ones in London but apparently that don't count as it's London.

In my defence I've never seen Cold Feet so don't know anything about it. Though granted, should have done my research before posting. Can I try again?

[Jockice]

Russell Grant in the canteen at my old workplace.

Craig Charles on an otherwise deserted lane in Sheffield city centre. I was going one way, he was going the other. We sort of nodded to each other despite never having met before. A couple of years later I was in a suburban pub and he walked past where I was sitting on the way to the toilet. Bloody stalker.

Not all that far from this pub (The Stag for those of you who know Sheffield) there's another pub called The Cherry Tree. It's in the middle of a (reasonably middle class) suburb and in the few times I've been in there it has been practically empty. It's not the sort of boozer people go out of their way to visit.

So imagine my surprise when I bumped into an old friend of mine who lives not far from it and he told me that he'd been in there the previous night and had met, and I quote: "Joe Strummer, that bird from Catatonia and some bloke who used to be in Pulp.'' Yeah right mate I thought. Exactly how much did you have to drink last night?

None of the acts had performed locally and although Pulp are from Sheffield I couldn't think of any reason why the other two would be in town, so I did my investigative journalist bit and you know what, it turned out to be absolutely true. The ex-Pulp member (for a few months in the late 80s) was Antony Genn, who was the bloke who streaked across stage when Elastica played Glastonbury  and ended up joining them on tour. At the time of his Cherry Tree sighting he had started dating Cerys and had brought her up to Sheffield to meet his family. He was also working with Strummer at the time and went on to be a member of The Mescaleros. The former Clash man had just decided to pop up to Sheffield to get out of the studio for a few days. So there we go.

Incidentally, the last time I saw Antony (who I've known for years anyway) was a similar situation to my first meeting with Craig Charles - on an otherwise deserted road. I can't even remember why I was there but I got out of the car just as he came round the corner. It was a Sunday afternoon and there was literally no-one else around. Spooky.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Malcolm Rifkind, John Redgrave and John Selwyn-Gummer in a lift but it wasn't that unlikely as I was nearing the epicentre of the Death Star on that day.

You're making these up, aren't you, Buelligan ? It's a shame, I wanted the D. Bowie one to be true :(

[DrGreggles]

Did I mention about the time I sang a Queen song to Brian May twice?

Did they do a song called "You're A Cunt?"

[Enrico Palazzo]

Bill Oddie on Oxford Street taking an apple core out of his jacket pocket and throwing it on to the road.

[Noonling]

I saw Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ sat in an Audi on the side of the M40 back in 2011.

Two years later I saw him buy dandruff treatment in a pharmacist in Bolton.

[NoSleep]

Bill Oddie on Oxford Street taking an apple core out of his jacket pocket and throwing it on to the road.

Probably feeding the birds.

I saw Bill Oddie in the audience at a Return To Forever gig at the Rainbow (Finsbury Park Astoria).
Saw Howard Devoto in the audience at a Tackhead/Mark Stewart & The Maffia gig at the Astoria, Charing Cross Rd.
Liz Frazer in the bar at ULU avoiding Swans (I think she had come to see support band Tackhead/Mark Stewart & The Maffia as I had also done).
Several members of Henry Cow in attendance at an early gig of Hatfield & The North in Notre Dame Hall, Leicester Square. Dave Stewart (H&TN, not Eurythmics) was handling the box office at the theatre when I entered. Richard Sinclair had a nosebleed onstage and bled all over his bass.

Saw Rory Gallagher in Foyles, and saw Richard Sinclair in Foyles on another occasion.
Saw Shane McGowan in the bar of Blooms in Dublin, but that's far from unlikely.

[ColinPopshed]

Arthur Lowe in Marks & Spencer, Wolverhampton. This was a very long time ago, before he died.

This just made me laugh on the train, and I'm not even sure why.

[Cuellar]

I once saw Richard Aoyade...at the NATIONAL THEATRE!!! IMAGINE THAT.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Pete Burns (very tall)

I used to see Pete Burns quite often when I lived in Queens Park as he lived nearby, nearly always sat outside The Salusbury Pub nursing a soft drink. It then turned out he hadn't been paying his rent for ages, and owed his landlord £34,000 at the point he was evicted, and shortly afterwards he died, which was all rather sad.

[bollocks]

had a thumb war with the singer from franz ferdinand on my 18th birthday in a pub around shoreditch. he took it very seriously, was completely sober, and beat me easily

[biggytitbo]

had a thumb war with the singer from franz ferdinand on my 18th birthday in a pub around shoreditch. he took it very seriously, was completely sober, and beat me easily

6 years old he was.

[Cuntbeaks]

Jerry Sadowitz haggling over the price of some second hand DVDs in Missing Records, Glasgow.

Elaine C Smith browsing the reduced items in Waitrose.

Jeremy Vine walking past The Griffin pub in Glasgow. Probably on his way to the BBC studios.

[NoSleep]

Gordon Kennedy and Peter Baikie queueing up for jacket potatoes at Jackets in Clapham High Street (miss that place).

[Chollis]

Gordon Kennedy and Peter Baikie queueing up for jacket potatoes at Jackets in Clapham High Street (miss that place).

likely