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Cliff Richard forgives the BBC [split topic]

Started by im barry bethel, November 26, 2018, 09:03:46 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

im barry bethel

BREAKING NEWS...

Cliff forgives the bbc

Speaking on the BBC breakfast news Cliff has been talking about how the nonce libel trial nearly crushed him but as a Christian he has forgiven the BBC for the intrusion of his privacy, incidentally Cliff has got a new album out just in time for Christmas and let's hear a clip from it now

biggytitbo

All that money he won helps ease the pain too, no doubt.

Butchers Blind

Only a matter of time before he dies and that secret room is found giving up all the Cliff secrets.

biggytitbo

Yes, and the contents of that filing cabinet he has that is simply labeled 'vendettas'.


Quote from: im barry bethel on November 26, 2018, 09:03:46 AM
BREAKING NEWS...

Cliff forgives the bbc

Speaking on the BBC breakfast news Cliff has been talking about how the nonce libel trial nearly crushed him but as a Christian he has forgiven the BBC for the intrusion of his privacy, incidentally Cliff has got a new album out just in time for Christmas and let's hear a clip from it now

It's written in the Bible, Psalm 6:14: "If thine enemy pays thou a sum of £850,000 and provideth thou with free publicity for thy new album, thou shouldst forgive them their trespasses."

gilbertharding


Quote

Album of the week in The Guardian. Which makes you wonder if there were any other albums actually released that week.

QuoteThe rest chugs along pleasantly enough without ever threatening to set the world on fire

Sounds amazing.

Butchers Blind

Following his death, hopefully the Police will re-open their investigation in the Jill Dando murder and Cliff's involvement.

biggytitbo

By Cliff's involvement, you do of course mean his strenuous and relentless attempts to find the real killer in the 20 years since that tragic day.

I'm not saying they wouldn't find anything in the filing cabinet though.

Butchers Blind

Jill built up a friendship with Cliff due to her involvement with the Holiday programme.  Unfortunately Jill was witness to some of Cliff's more unsavoury character traits.  Cliff couldn't have this so had her taken out on the doorstep and pinned it on a Freddie Mercury impersonator.  Cliff despised and was secretly jealous of Freddie's out-there public lifestyle.

biggytitbo

I heard Jill was taken out because she'd discovered what Cliff had done to Princess Diana.

That is, Cliff took her out for a nice meal to apologise for buying Princess Diana a lovely new handbag as a birthday present, something that made Jill very jealous. This was years before the murder, which occurred on a day Cliff had a cast iron alibi.

BlodwynPig


biggytitbo

No one ever could explain why Cliff had an entry for 'Serbian hitman' in his filofax though.

gilbertharding

Quote from: Butchers Blind on November 26, 2018, 12:09:47 PM
...the Holiday programme.

Guaranteed to have at least 3 (Three) female nipples in every episode. Doesn't sound a lot, but for a Sunday tea time, on BBC1, in the late 1970s and early 1980s, it was practically hardcore pr0n. Only bromide effect of Cliff Michelmore prevented Mary Whitehouse from taking to the streets in protest.

imitationleather

Saw this thread and thought he was either dead or Yewtreed.

If I'd been given a million guesses I never would have landed upon "His new album has been given a lukewarm review by The Guardian."

biggytitbo

I don't know why Cliff Richard didn't take a leaf out of Sir Rolf Harris's book and fill his album with bitter diatribes about all the people who have wronged him - Cliff must have a list of enemies as thick as a hone book so it could even have been a double album.

Beagle 2

I'd like to see a 20ft high oil painting of Cliff Richard as Christ nailed to the cross, naked as the day he was born, an expression of exquisite release on his face.

I'd just like to see that.

shiftwork2

Unpleasant man, everything he says is a disguised boast.

Alright cheers

Quote from: Beagle 2 on November 26, 2018, 02:42:46 PM
I'd like to see a 20ft high oil painting of Cliff Richard as Christ nailed to the cross, naked as the day he was born, an expression of exquisite release on his face.

I'd just like to see that.

You'll have to settle for the media crucifixion that'll follow his death....

biggytitbo



thenoise

For me, it's not personal. I hate everyone called Cliff.

biggytitbo

Cliff has a team of men who travel everywhere with him in a truck full of powerful stage lights that they shine in his face whenever he is seen in public, so that people can't see that his face skin now has the consistency of bollocks.

steve98

Quote from: biggytitbo on November 26, 2018, 05:38:04 PM
The male Cilla.


Oddly, If you zoom-in on the knot in Cliff's tie here you can see an image of Cilla (Singing) (Least I can.)


Quote from: hedgehog90 on November 26, 2018, 05:57:21 PM





BlodwynPig

Quote from: steve98 on November 26, 2018, 08:12:17 PM

Oddly, If you zoom-in on the knot in Cliff's tie here you can see an image of Cilla (Singing) (Least I can.)

Bloody hell



biggytitbo


BlodwynPig


hedgehog90

If you crank up the contrast it reveals his true form: