Author Topic: Advent calendars  (Read 2144 times)

im barry bethel

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Advent calendars
« on: December 03, 2018, 09:56:12 AM »
You're never too old, I've got a Quality Street and Malteasers on the go, one of the nippers has a Haribo, one wanted a Lindt chocolate one but that was a tenner so no chance. Last year my nurse had an Aldi perfume one and there's a load of beer/gin/cheese ones doing the rounds. Anyway whilst in the B&M shop I spotted all-sorts, seems every fucker and their wife is jumping on the piddly chocolate sales bandwagon












What sort of fucker is happy with a bloody Pringles advent calendar eh?


Edit: I have no idea why that last bit appears as a link as I struggle to remember how insert them like that

Edit edit: wtf?

king_tubby

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #1 on: December 03, 2018, 09:59:03 AM »
Star Wars Lego. There was a tiny Sarlacc pit yesterday.

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #2 on: December 03, 2018, 10:15:32 AM »


24 bags of pork crackling in 6 different flavours.

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #3 on: December 03, 2018, 10:18:04 AM »
I got a Pact Coffee one as an early present from the missus.
Up to the 9th already.

Captain Z

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #4 on: December 03, 2018, 10:23:13 AM »

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #5 on: December 03, 2018, 10:36:49 AM »
Absolutely pathetic even for a child, oooh a little chocolate grow up you eight year old waste

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #6 on: December 03, 2018, 10:41:13 AM »
Barry - how big would a beer advent calendar have to be to even be worth it? I'd want a pint each day, so it would have to nearly 14 litres of booze in a big cardboard slab.

Actually I'd like one with 24 tiny pubs in it, Vic & Bob style.

king_tubby

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #7 on: December 03, 2018, 10:41:25 AM »
That chocolate was put there by Jesus Himself.

icehaven

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #8 on: December 03, 2018, 10:46:12 AM »
I saw some quite nice looking chocolate ones in Aldi a few weeks ago so I might get one later if they still have any and they're discounted. Tune in tomorrow for the next thrilling instalment and find out if there were any left!!

SteveDave

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #9 on: December 03, 2018, 10:51:08 AM »
Everyone was given an advent calendar in work on Friday. As I'm not a child I simply ripped the back off it and ate the chocolate throughout the day. Take that the man.

Norton Canes

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #10 on: December 03, 2018, 10:55:21 AM »
Star Wars Lego. There was a tiny Sarlacc pit yesterday

This? Amazing what you can do with Lego.



Norton Canes

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #11 on: December 03, 2018, 10:58:59 AM »
Apologies for the spoiler but here's the Hoth gun emplacement from day 7:


king_tubby

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #12 on: December 03, 2018, 11:04:39 AM »
This? Amazing what you can do with Lego.




Aye, that's it. The sail barge was for Dec 1st, which I thought was a tad underwhelming.

ZoyzaSorris

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #13 on: December 03, 2018, 11:25:05 AM »
The Kid’s got a normal lego advent calendar (it is his borthday in dec as well so thought he deserved a treat). I havent got anything though because im an adult hurtling towards terrifying oblivion and little doors containing palm-oil derived chocolate wont cure this.

shiftwork2

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #14 on: December 03, 2018, 11:31:54 AM »
I saw one filled with gin miniatures the other day, it was about fifty quid.

Norton Canes

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #15 on: December 03, 2018, 11:37:31 AM »
Sin a cheese one. Presumably you have to hang it in the fridge.

Paul Calf

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #16 on: December 03, 2018, 11:40:27 AM »
I've got a Quality Street one. They're lovely this year, especially when you consider that they're designed in three colours.

You can fuck off with your cheese, gin and pork scratching bollocks.

Cuellar

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #17 on: December 03, 2018, 11:42:21 AM »
I just like the ones where there's a nice picture of a tree, or a little doggy with a christmas hat on, or a snowflake or something.

It's no wonder the world's gone to the dogs, reading this thread.

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #18 on: December 03, 2018, 11:48:21 AM »
They had Haribo ones in Tesco. Couldn't help myself as it contains some of the varieties that you can't normally get in the UK. Yesterday had a little bag of "Phantasia" which contains dinosaurs, various monsters, trolls, gnomes and such from European folklore and, in keeping with the Christian spirit of Christmas, Satan himself.

https://www.haribo.com/deDE/world/produkte/lieblingsprodukte/phantasia.html

BlodwynPig

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #19 on: December 03, 2018, 01:35:49 PM »


24 bags of pork crackling in 6 different flavours.

can you send me one?

alan nagsworth

  • i heard troubled breath
Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #20 on: December 03, 2018, 01:48:42 PM »
got a celeb love island one. each little window has got the spunk or fanny juice of one of the contestants inside and you get to have a sniff or a taste. well worth the £200, it's what xmas is all about, this stuff

icehaven

  • I will be in the bar, with my head on the bar
Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #21 on: December 03, 2018, 02:10:30 PM »
I've just remembered that the 7"vinyl single of Chris Rea's ''Winter Song''* came in an advent calendar sleeve and his face was under the 24.

*Not even ''Driving Home For Christmas''!!

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #22 on: December 03, 2018, 02:14:45 PM »
Advent calendars?!?

Hard Brexit's too good for you lot!

Blinder Data

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #23 on: December 03, 2018, 02:15:57 PM »
I've got a proper one from the future in-laws - no chocolate, just christianity. Jesus is our gift

You heathens make me sick

alan nagsworth

  • i heard troubled breath
Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #24 on: December 03, 2018, 02:29:49 PM »
Here, you know what would be a great idea for a posh advent calendar? An electronic game with the same principle as Operation, called Body of Christ.

They layout would be Jesus' naked body with 25 different bodily ailments. Every day you open a new one and try to fish out whatever delicious candy broken bone or tumour or clogged artery or whatever without touching the sides and setting off the buzzer, which would go "CHRIST!!" and the halo would flash.

Fuck me that's good isn't it? I should maybe send it off before one of you nicks it.

BlodwynPig

  • R.I.P. The Waxwork René
Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #25 on: December 03, 2018, 02:38:41 PM »
Here, you know what would be a great idea for a posh advent calendar? An electronic game with the same principle as Operation, called Body of Christ.

They layout would be Jesus' naked body with 25 different bodily ailments. Every day you open a new one and try to fish out whatever delicious candy broken bone or tumour or clogged artery or whatever without touching the sides and setting off the buzzer, which would go "CHRIST!!" and the halo would flash.

Fuck me that's good isn't it? I should maybe send it off before one of you nicks it.

https://insight.typepad.co.uk/insight/2008/01/the-body-of-chr.html

alan nagsworth

  • i heard troubled breath

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Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #27 on: December 03, 2018, 04:59:59 PM »
I wonder if there is an Advent Calendarse that is just window upon window of - you guessed it!! - arse.

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #28 on: December 03, 2018, 05:27:49 PM »
Picked up a smol horsie one for 29p from B&M, but I keep hoping to find discounted good ones (e.g. Thorntons) as well, as Kinnerton... well you get what you pay for.   But it seems they've all cottoned on that we've cottoned on to buying them reduced in December, so are leaving them full price for longer.... same happens at Easter...

Re: Advent calendars
« Reply #29 on: December 03, 2018, 05:36:19 PM »
Picked up a smol horsie one for 29p from B&M, but I keep hoping to find discounted good ones (e.g. Thorntons) as well, as Kinnerton... well you get what you pay for.   But it seems they've all cottoned on that we've cottoned on to buying them reduced in December, so are leaving them full price for longer.... same happens at Easter...

I can't imagine how much you'd have to hate yourself to subject yourself to a piece of Kinnerton chocolate every day for three weeks.

DESOLATION.