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Old Flash games

Started by the, December 05, 2018, 12:53:29 PM

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the

Earlier I was thinking about a little Flash game that someone in my office had in about 2000 (DEAD SOON) called Snowcraft. I think it was a promotional item for a US airline.

It was a cute little isometric game where you had to dispatch ever-increasing hoardes of kids in a snowball fight. Sweet and simple, like a cross between Cannon Fodder and Peanuts.

Approaching FESTIXMAS and all, I had a look online earlier and was delighted to find it was still knocking around.


Just wondered if you had any rose-tinted memories of Flash/Shockwave games/curios (usually the sort that you'd download/pass around and run from an .EXE, from when that was the sort of IT security gape that went reasonably unchecked).

I remember a neat crazy golf one and a little app with a dancing robot. But let's not talk about that one where you feel up the woman's knockers.

PlanktonSideburns

YES mate this is my kind of thread

Superfighters - silly little 8bit fight/shootemup with amazing controls and difficulty curve. Still available on new grounds

Rouge fable 2 - lovely little Rouge like, again great difficulty curve. Newgrounds

Will think of more later

Dex Sawash


madhair60


Cuellar

It came as a great surprise to find out, a few years ago, that the silly game where you throw snowballs at Glasgow tenement windows that I had enjoyed hugely as a child was voiced by Limmy, who I'd obviously never heard of at that point!

Norton Canes

Sad to say, the creation of this game was probably my greatest professional achievemnt

It won a national award


samadriel

Samorost!  Love that soundtrack, it's a neat little game.  The rest of that company's work is also impressive, some of it also in Flash.

Spend many a dull moment at work playing Miniclip Golf and Miniclip Pool. YetiSports was quite big for a while. Pengu Throw and Flamingo Drive being pretty memorable.

Saramost was fantastic.

surreal



madhair60

Flying Slime Volleyball, which was not actually Flash.

Spear Toss.

Seconds of Madness.

the

Why not talk about them instead of just listing them.

Norton Canes

Well, since you ask...

NHS North Yorkshire and York came to the agency I was contracted with at the time because they wanted a viral game to go along with their new 'safe sex' promotion. I was the agency's Flash developer so it fell to me to flesh out some drafts. Initially I had the idea of the player having to shoot AIDS virus bacteria as they were ejaculated into a woman's cervix but that concept was vetoed by the rather conservative management. Fearful that I might come up with an even more controversial approach they instructed me to play safe, so to speak, and work up something along the lines of the old 'track racer' arcade games where the player had to hammer a pair of buttons to make their athlete run faster. Fortunately I realised I could milk this idea for ribald comedy potential and embarked upon sourcing some images and coding up the core functions.

(At this point I should confirm the readers' worst suspicions and say that the game appears to be no longer online - if anyone does find it I'd be eternally grateful)



Nearly done! Note the five stars, meaning all condoms have been collected. No STDs here!


The game takes place over five levels or 'bases', the fifth level as you can see being The Bed. Previous 'bases' see our protagonists, Fanny and Jonny, involved in lecherous behaviour in such salacious locations as a back alley, a nightclub and a bus stop, before they ensconce themselves on a sofa. The characters' likenesses are taken from a series of stock photos in which the subjects are shown in a assortment of poses, meaning I could animate the action in a number of realistic ways. I was particularly pleased with the way their expressions change, becoming more excited as they reach sexual gratification. Play involves striking a 'left' and 'right' key as quickly as possible in order to pump a 'passion meter' up to 100%. In the final level the 100% mark represents Jonny's ejaculation. Once per level a condom will appear briefly and the player must hit a third key before it vanishes. Failure to do this will mean intercourse has not been completed safely and the game will immediately end, simulating the fact the the players have caught a sexually transmitted disease.

As you can see, response to the game was extremely positive, and I am proud to have whipped up some disgust from the more prudish participants. Thanks, councillor John Blackie! Without doubt the most pleasing response was the bestowal of a national award for the game's success. That's a national award. I am a national award winning game designer and have put that fact proudly on my CV ever since. And I would like to point out that the finished version of the game contains only graphic content and coding that was completed by myself alone - despite what my Cunt of an Ex-Boss, who tried to claim some of the glory just because he thought of doing it as a track racer clone, might say. He is a cunt.


Anyway thanks the, glad to have the opportunity to elucidate.

PlanktonSideburns

Couplea classic puns in that report

the

Quote from: Norton Canes on January 08, 2019, 05:26:48 PMAnyway thanks the, glad to have the opportunity to elucidate.

No problem G - if you can't spray it up the walls here, where can you?

Very impressive - but some questions:

1) Were you duty-bound to contact the stock photo models and inform them that you were going to publically make them electro-shag?

2) By what percentage was the use of Chinese Girl (1952) based on Bottom?

3) Can you remember the address/TLD/URL that the game was hosted at (as it may inform whether we can archivally dredge a copy up)?

Ferris

Quote from: madhair60 on January 08, 2019, 01:28:16 PM
Flying Slime Volleyball, which was not actually Flash.

Fucking absolutely yes. I was amazing at Slime Volleyball.

Twed

Just turning up here to brag that some of the Flash games I made were so very important that they even had TV commercials that as many as nine people would have seen:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNE21q_G3PY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19d0hSaFVCY < is that George Lowe? In my deepest wishes I hope so

PlanktonSideburns

wow i like the look of mountain maniac!

will dig that up for sure

PlanktonSideburns

mountain maniac is a beast! good work

Norton Canes

Quote from: the on January 09, 2019, 01:34:29 AM
No problem G - if you can't spray it up the walls here, where can you?

Very impressive - but some questions:

1) Were you duty-bound to contact the stock photo models and inform them that you were going to publically make them electro-shag?

Who knows? I just grabbed them off iStock or somesuch. I like to think they'd feel honoured to help the cause of sexual health in North Yorkshire and York. 

Quote
2) By what percentage was the use of Chinese Girl (1952) based on Bottom?

None percent. I suspect that, like the makers of Bottom, I thought it exuded an appropriate degree of seediness.

Quote
3) Can you remember the address/TLD/URL that the game was hosted at (as it may inform whether we can archivally dredge a copy up)?

Hang on, whut tha... how did I miss it? Just looked at www.yorsexualhealth.org.uk/fanny-and-jonny and it's still there! I think I must have used a non Flash-enabled browser. Shag away!

Warning: It gets harder on each level


(a popup appeared in IE asking me for a password, just cancel that obv)

Twed

Quote from: PlanktonSideburns on January 09, 2019, 10:14:56 AM
mountain maniac is a beast! good work
Thanks! I'm genuinely proud of it. I nearly killed myself trying to get it to feel right. It's really difficult to make a boulder floaty and yet weighty.

PlanktonSideburns

yea physics and mechanics are spot on here, - cant beat a well balanced flash game

Twed

Sausage Factory was a flawed pile of shit from the start though. It's fun if you can actually get four players on one keyboard though, but most of the fun there is derived from four people trying to use a keyboard and not really the game itself.

Twed

Quote from: Norton Canes on January 09, 2019, 10:23:38 AM
Hang on, whut tha... how did I miss it? Just looked at www.yorsexualhealth.org.uk/fanny-and-jonny and it's still there! I think I must have used a non Flash-enabled browser. Shag away!

Warning: It gets harder on each level
Daley Thompson's Super STD Test

boki

Quote from: Norton Canes on January 09, 2019, 10:23:38 AMWarning: It gets harder on each level

I bet it does, Canes, you dirty old bollocks.

the

Quote from: Norton Canes on January 09, 2019, 10:23:38 AMHang on, whut tha... how did I miss it? Just looked at www.yorsexualhealth.org.uk/fanny-and-jonny and it's still there! I think I must have used a non Flash-enabled browser. Shag away!

Wa-hey:

     

9.87 seconds ladies ;)

It is still in Flash form. Best times table doesn't work anymore though. (My total score was 49.22 seconds)

Impressive work Norton. I like the changes of facial expression on that last level.

dex

The interactive ones on stickdeath.com

Puppy throw

The ass hunter

Norton Canes

Oh, how could I forget: Orisinal. Gold standard of Flash games for me.

Picked one at random - Drifting Afternoon. Just beautiful. Blissfully good graphics, simple point-and-click gameplay. Probably slightly too fast, it's made me a bit dizzy, but I think that's down to my deteriorating eyesight...

PlanktonSideburns

fuck mountain maniac is HARD!

any gamplay tips?

Twed

Always make the biggest boulder, use lots of sideway motion at the bottom of the mountain to smash houses. The yeti should be avoided - its spawn points are random few fixed spots. Bosses are easy when you know the patterns. You shouldn't need to die of losing lives when you play competently, it should just be that you didn't get a high enough score the nth time through the levels.

Your rage meter fills by what you've smashed and is depleted by moving the boulder.