The Christmas Spirit Can Fuck Off

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

bgmnts didn't want to start a thread for this, so I will.

Christmas is a load of old bollocks, and I'll be working all over the Crimbo holiday. I hope the greater majority of you lot can say the same thing.

[pancreas]

What are you talking about. This is the time you get your Cha Cha heels under the Christmas tree.

[biggytitbo]

Just don't have one - it's cheaper and you won't have to have to endure a load of bad tv and crippling stomach pain.

[checkoutgirl]

Lisa, put down the keyboard. Step away from the computer. Take a walk. Hug a child who you are related to in an appropriate, platonic manner. Look at the birds in the trees. Smell the air. And relax.

Where's Buelligan? She's better at this stuff.

[checkoutgirl]

Oh and stop saying things can fuck off. It's tiresome and silly.

[Blue Jam]

I REALLY FEEL ALL THE MAGICAL CHRISTMAS SPIRIT

FLY

[bgmnts]

Checkoutgirl can fuck off.

[Cloud]

It's December so it's allowed into my life now, but currently the stress of trying to think what to buy people is completely drowning out any "spirit".  I'll get into it when it's all sorted (generally Xmas Eve)

[DrGreggles]

I get 3 'bonus' days off overs the festive period - Christmas Day, Boxing Day* and New Years Day.
On the former I will eat lots of food and on the latter I'll be hungover.
The rest can fuck off.

*on call, so not really a day off

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Checkoutgirl can fuck off.

*that stock footage of those old ladies clapping from 'Monty Python And His Flying Circus *

[checkoutgirl]

Checkoutgirl can fuck off.

A rude Cabber? Well I never!!

[kittens]

love christmas. go home for two weeks and loaf around wanking in your old bedroom, stuffed to the brim with food, vomiting every couple of hours to fit more lager on top of the enormous chunk of stodge inside your guts. the real physical and mental of pain of your stomach skin stretching to contain all the trash you've forced down your throat. watching shit tv and crying because you're so pissed. being given presents by people who care about you. it's nice. never understood people who don't like it. 'it's bad cos a lot of people like it, like with hitler'. a lot of people like it cos it's time off work and you get presents - that's nothing like hitler. it's the opposite of hitler yet people say they don't like it cos it is like hitler. how can the opposite of hitler be like hitler. tell me.

[checkoutgirl]

I'm going to take the three days after Crimbo off to complete the week off. I'm going to download the original Star Wars trilogy, buy a pepperoni Chicago Town pizza and some booze, kick, puff, doze, max, stim and turb. I know stim kills but it's Christmas so fuck it. I've already spend €80 on a real Christmas tree and €580 on a few nights in Budapest for someone's present.

And I'm not going to stop there Bellamy. I'm going over budget on my dad's Cris Kringle present and I'll get a hamper of food and drink for my mother. And if anyone has a problem with that they can go eat a yogurt.

[Attila]

I REALLY FEEL ALL THE MAGICAL CHRISTMAS SPIRIT

FLY

He'll freeze the diaaaamond money

{I just watched this -- again -- yesterday}

[biggytitbo]

Hitler actually invented Christmas though didn't he? Before 1933, Christmas was largely a little observed pagan festival where people would go into the woods and insert nuts and berries into their anuses to tide them over for the winter.


The original Santa was also Hitler dressed up, all the other Nazis knew it was him but they didn't say anything or they wouldn't get a present.

[bgmnts]

A rude Cabber? Well I never!!

To be fair i'm probably the nicest user here.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

To be fair i'm probably the nicest user here.

No you're not, you stupid cunt.

[Spoon of Ploff]

...time off work and you get presents - that's nothing like hitler...

[checkoutgirl]

Hitler actually invented Christmas

So he did one thing right. I've often thought people are a bit hard on Hitler.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Top Edwyn Collins lookalike checkoutgirl showing me the error of my ways by making jokes about Hitler, there. Festive Fuehrer Funnies!

[SteveDave]

I too despise Cmas. I don't mind the day itself and surprising loved ones with poorly thought out gifts (an Always Sunny dick towel for my wife...a toy piano for my son) but the whole build up to it can fuck off.

DJing is especially troublesome at this time as there's a non-stop line of pricks asking for "Fairytale Of New York" every 15 minutes. There are 4 good Christmas songs

1) Christmas Wrapping
2) Simply Having A Wonderful Christmastime
3) Another Rock N Roll Christmas
4) Millenium Prayer

[poodlefaker]

"Is a giant Toblerone, ja? You guys know mein weakness, aha-ha. Or perhaps zer yard of Jaffakuchen?"

[Cuellar]

I used to love Christmas, but now I'm not so sure!

Now it's all "Well we'll go to in-laws (x date) to (y date) then maybe we can come for a few days after/before, then we're going to see (z), then maybe for New Year's Eve we can be...."

SNOOZE. Fuck all this responsibility. Boring conversations with boring relatives day in day out, and booze can only deaden so much. And if you're driving (I always am), you can't even do that. Put me in a cave on a hill.

[Icehaven]

love christmas. go home for two weeks and loaf around wanking in your old bedroom, stuffed to the brim with food, vomiting every couple of hours to fit more lager on top of the enormous chunk of stodge inside your guts. the real physical and mental of pain of your stomach skin stretching to contain all the trash you've forced down your throat. watching shit tv and crying because you're so pissed. being given presents by people who care about you. it's nice. never understood people who don't like it.

Christmas is enjoyable right up to the point when you reach the age when the expectation to actually organise anything and/or buy a lot of presents starts to fall on you, so it's generally a whole different ball game once you're over about 30. Far less presents, way more pressure, and 'going home' stops being a given and starts becoming ''going to your partner's home'' or worse still, being the host yourself.

[Cuellar]

Bang on. It's rubbish.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Bang on. It's rubbish.

Not one of the Propellorheads' best, admittedly. That one with Shirley Bassey is loads better.

Bit o/t, that comment of yours, mate.

[checkoutgirl]

I'm 40 and my mam still cooks the dinner which is key. Christmas dinner can take days if not weeks to prepare and the whole thing is scoffed in about 15 minutes. That would break my heart having to prepare all that for just 15 minutes of eating. At least I don't have to do that yet. It all changes when you have your own childs so sterilisation looks like a good bet.

[Cuellar]

If I'm at my parents for Christmas, my brother and I cook the dinner. Which basically means whoever is the least hungover gets up and puts the turkey in the oven, then my brother gets stressed at everything, shouts a lot at mum/dad hovering on the sidelines, then shouts at me for some reason and I storm off, only agreeing to peel the potatoes and do the other veg if he isn't in the kitchen. That is one good thing about not going home at Christmas I suppose. That and my partner's mum is an excellent chef and her food is always absolutely delicious.

[kittens]

i have told my girlfriend i will never go to her parent's house at christmas. i will always go to my mum's house and get pissed and fat, even when she is too old and fucked up to live there. nothing will ruin my special day.

[Lemming]

Hate the event itself (and all the fucking ball-ache surrounding it) but really love winter, so it's a double edged sword.