Mad looking foliage

[Kryton]

The Screaming tree of Fredville Park, Nonington, Kent, England.
Known throughout aeons of time as 'The angry tree', 'Old Jack' or quite simply 'The Kentish crawler'.

Apparently it was tradition for several Earls to make love on the lawn with their wives, just out of reach of the tree, just to wind it up.

The council put a fence around it in 1999 but it was not enough. In 2014 several youths carved their names into the tree and spray painted the words 'ANGERY FUK TREE LOL' into the bark-like flesh of the monster, before escaping on some shitty miniature scooters. But not before one of the youngsters was lashesd off his vehicle and dragged into the roaring mouth by a branch-like leafy tendril.

In June 2018 an early morning jogger was plucked into its screaming maw prompting the Council to consider building a secondary fence around the thing.

[Sin Agog]

Who put Bella in the Wych Elm?

[Clatty McCutcheon]

You lean your bike against a tree, nip away for a few short decades, and come back to find that the great wooden git has eaten it (and its new growth has lifted your bike several feet off the ground).

[Clatty McCutcheon]

A stag-headed tree - doing an impression of Shoulders? Stomach!'s avatar? 

http://www.treeterms.co.uk/definitions/stag-head



A tree going bald - there's something CAB can identify with.  The tree's mental health and phimosis situation were unknown at the time of posting.

[Kryton]

You lean your bike against a tree, nip away for a few short decades, and come back to find that the great wooden git has eaten it (and its new growth has lifted your bike several feet off the ground).

I like how the tree adapted the handlebars into a kind of eyebrow.

[MuteBanana]

Where are these woods where nobody nicks a forgotten bike?

[Cerys]

Somewhere in Midsomer, probably.

[popcorn]

You lean your bike against a tree, nip away for a few short decades, and come back to find that the great wooden git has eaten it (and its new growth has lifted your bike several feet off the ground).

Bit of an urban myth: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/bicycle-tree/

[Clatty McCutcheon]

Bit of an urban myth: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/bicycle-tree/

Pah! Well, at least it remains a bit of a mystery how it got there.  I still think the tree enveloped at least part of it, even if the backstory is mostly bullshit.

There is a more low-key example much closer to home, in a wood at Brig o' Turk, about 20 miles west of Stirling.  The story is that the local blacksmith used to dump scrap in the woods and the tree grew around it. You can see handlebars and a saddle poking out in this photo.

[Buelligan]

I always liked this story.

[Brian Freeze]

On the subject of guns and trees - I haven't a photo but I was turning an oak newel post from American Oak from over there when I noticed a change in the shavings coming off. Another pass revealed a big brass jacketed bullet embedded in the tree. I'm not an arms expert so couldn't tell you about the bullet much but its high on the unusual things I've found at work list.

The post got scrapped as no interesting knots or figuring was deemed desirable by the customers (bollocks I reckon - it was the dicks in quality control) so I stashed it away for future use and didn't get chance to retrieve it when the firm went bust.

[a peepee tipi]

There's a picture of my pubic hair that's absolutely perfect for this thread. Unfortunately I can't find it, and now I'm worried where it's gone

[Buelligan]

On the subject of guns and trees - I haven't a photo but I was turning an oak newel post from American Oak from over there when I noticed a change in the shavings coming off. Another pass revealed a big brass jacketed bullet embedded in the tree. I'm not an arms expert so couldn't tell you about the bullet much but its high on the unusual things I've found at work list.

The post got scrapped as no interesting knots or figuring was deemed desirable by the customers (bollocks I reckon - it was the dicks in quality control) so I stashed it away for future use and didn't get chance to retrieve it when the firm went bust.

Oh that's an intriguing (and slightly disappointingly ended) story.  Odd too because (I'm sure someone will be along to correct me) but the brass shell casing still being there means the round wasn't fired, which makes it more strange that it was inside a tree.  It would be great to see it, know what the bullet was and even trace back how it got there.  I find this sort of thing utterly fascinating.

[Brian Freeze]

I know, if we'd been told they were going bust I could have had my hoard of scrap timber away and a photo would have been forthcoming.

It definitely had the look of being fired and had mushroomed slightly on impact. Reckon it was maybe 9mm in diameter and was in a decent lump of wood as we'd bought it rough sawn and were making a 6" by 6" post by laminating two boards together. If I'd put it on the other way round it'd probably have remained hidden.

[Spoon of Ploff]

This thing, every year:



   makes me think of a Krynoid

[Ambient Sheep]

Bit of an urban myth: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/bicycle-tree/

Before getting this far down the thread I Google image-searched the pic because I was curious about the backstory.  The first hit was this much nicer article that has more photos, a longer interview with the former owner, and some comments from a University of Washington biology professor explaining how it probably happened:

https://www.thevintagenews.com/2016/08/29/the-real-story-behind-a-boy-left-his-bike-chained-to-a-tree-when-he-went-away-to-war-in-1914/

(Despite the URL it does debunk the war story.)

[St_Eddie]

The Screaming tree of Fredville Park, Nonington, Kent, England.
Known throughout aeons of time as 'The angry tree', 'Old Jack' or quite simply 'The Kentish crawler'.

Apparently it was tradition for several Earls to make love on the lawn with their wives, just out of reach of the tree, just to wind it up.

The council put a fence around it in 1999 but it was not enough. In 2014 several youths carved their names into the tree and spray painted the words 'ANGERY FUK TREE LOL' into the bark-like flesh of the monster, before escaping on some shitty miniature scooters. But not before one of the youngsters was lashesd off his vehicle and dragged into the roaring mouth by a branch-like leafy tendril.

In June 2018 an early morning jogger was plucked into its screaming maw prompting the Council to consider building a secondary fence around the thing.

So that's what the tree from William Friedkin's The Guardian is up to these days.  Getting his jollies, by excreting sap, as he bitterly watches impromptu peep shows.  To be fair, as far as post-fame lives go, that's one of the better ones.

You lean your bike against a tree, nip away for a few short decades, and come back to find that the great wooden git has eaten it (and its new growth has lifted your bike several feet off the ground).

Which is more likely; your farfetched account of events, or the far more plausible scenario of this; inside that devious and ravenous tree, lays the skeletal remains of an 8 year old boy, jawbone still agape with his death pose of abject horror?

Bit of an urban myth: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/bicycle-tree/

That's what the greedy wooden bastard wants you to think, you gullible fool!

[Ferris]

Oh that's an intriguing (and slightly disappointingly ended) story.  Odd too because (I'm sure someone will be along to correct me) but the brass shell casing still being there means the round wasn't fired, which makes it more strange that it was inside a tree.  It would be great to see it, know what the bullet was and even trace back how it got there.  I find this sort of thing utterly fascinating.

Yup, but Brian Freeze is probably referring to the projectile which is usually copper-coated lead. I doubt it had the brass casing because (as you correctly point out) that would be very unlikely.

[St_Eddie]

This thing, every year:



   makes me think of a Krynoid

I was thinking No Name, in his monstrous form, from Spirited Away.

[Replies From View]

You lean your bike against a tree, nip away for a few short decades, and come back to find that the great wooden git has eaten it (and its new growth has lifted your bike several feet off the ground).

Pompeii Dogs  :(

[Spoon of Ploff]

I was thinking No Name, in his monstrous form, from Spirited Away.

ooooh shiii...



... you're right.

[St_Eddie]

ooooh shiii...



... you're right.

He's even carrying the little frog-man, in preparation of a French delicacy.

[gib]

This thing, every year:



   makes me think of a Krynoid

[Brian Freeze]

Yup, but Brian Freeze is probably referring to the projectile which is usually copper-coated lead. I doubt it had the brass casing because (as you correctly point out) that would be very unlikely.

Cheers for the clarification, that sounds about right. As I said, I'm no gun nut.
Or am I suggesting that you are.

[Brian Freeze]

This thing, every year:



   makes me think of a Krynoid

Is it a Virginia Creeper? They go quite red like that. My first thought was of a prancing horse but the No Name suggestion is bang on.

[Brian Freeze]

My own foliage thought was of the first time seeing a pond that had been monopolized  by Mare's Tail Fern. I'd never seen it (or noticed it) growing up and coming across it completley filling this dip in the clough in my mid twenties made me think of dinosaurs and the like. Turns out not to be too far off the mark given how long it's been knocking about.

It's a bit of a twat to have around but like lots of weeds, I admire their tenacity and survival techniques.

[St_Eddie]

It's a bit of a twat to have around but like lots of weeds, I admire their tenacity and survival techniques.

Coincidentally enough, that's my entry in the Who's Who of CaB.

[greenman]

[gib]

Beech?

[greenman]

Close but its actually a hillside, near Haresfield Beacon.